Post by Joe Everyman on Jul 3, 2010 13:41:26 GMT -6
What a shame, what a shame,
To judge a life that you can't change
The choir sings, the church bells ring
So, won't you give this man his wings?
What a shame to have to beg you to see
We're not all the same
What a shame
To judge a life that you can't change
The choir sings, the church bells ring
So, won't you give this man his wings?
What a shame to have to beg you to see
We're not all the same
What a shame
The scene opens up inside of the backyard of Joe Everyman's house. The backyard is highly decorated with Fourth of July decorations. Lawn chairs and tables are set up all across the patio, with a horse shoe pit and a volley ball court set up across the yard, and a rather large above ground pool sitting off in the corner as well. Maria Williams, her sister Amber and their mother, Heather are all sitting out in reclining lawn chairs, wearing bikinis of their respective colors. The patriotic sounds of Creedence Clearwater Revival are playing in the background.
Amber Williams: So, Aurora is finally asleep?
Maria Williams: Yes, finally. It took me about an hour, but she's finally sleeping. Hopefully for a while now...I needed time to relax.
Heather Williams: So Maria, how were you able to get rid of all of your baby weight?
Maria Williams: Excuse me?
Heather Williams: I mean, how were you able to lose all of the weight you gained?
Maria Williams: Mom, I didn't gain that much weight...
Heather Williams: But you gained enough. How did you do it?
Maria Williams: Well...I...
Amber Williams: She works out alot, remember that mom.
Heather Williams: Oh yeah, good point. Good thing too, you did well last week.
Maria Williams: Thanks mom. We tried our best, and that's all that counts.
Heather Williams: Exactly.
Amber Williams: So Maria, how do you feel Joe will do this week?
Maria Williams: Are you kidding me? He's going to go out there and do what he does best.
Heather Williams: Lose?
Maria Williams: No!! He's going to go out there and do what he's been doing for the past month and win...again. This binge he's been on lately is just what he needed. And he told me after my match this past week that he got alot of confidence from his win and my match as well. I wouldn't exactly say he's out of confidence, but these wins are doing him wonders.
Heather Williams: I can think of something you can do to keep his head focused more.
Maria Williams: What's that?
Heather tugs on her bikini top, referencing to Maria.
Maria Williams: Mom!
Amber Williams: Mother!!
Heather Williams: What?! It works and you know it!
Four in a row. For the first time in over two years, I have four wins in a row. For me, this is big. I know alot of people would just scoff at having 'only' four in a row, but for me, it's huge. I know everyone always says the same old tired things about me, but this is still an accomplishment for me. I do wish I could have beaten some better people. The Academy is just a group of limp dick f*ck ups. Before that Destructor and I beat Ron Gibson and Nathan Doe, which could fit into the Academy well because of their lack of ability. And during this whole thing, I got another big win over Lance Ry...er, I mean Stefan Rzany. But he just brushed the loss off like nothing special happened. What kind of cocky attitude is that? I have beaten the man in three straight singles matches, and I basically forced the man to go crazy and quit the company. If you ask me, it was pretty damn big. But I'll move off from that onto this week.
For my three opponents this week, I have one thing to ask...do I look like the stupidest person on the planet? I mean, really? The same old sayings, the same old jokes...again. Are people really running out of original things to say to me? "You have no heart, you're going to deadline us, you never step up to be better". Are...you...f*cking...kidding me?! I have only heard these things from like...everyone I've ever fought. But, I do have to say this. Thank you Destructor for not being a complete and total asshole this week. It's really nice having an opponent who isn't a complete tool for once. Seth Evans and Gabriel Karras are just jealous of people like us, so they have to be jerks to get over. I watched you last week and you did a damn good job. You pinned Seth Evans for god's sake! You did a great job kid! This week though, I won't be going easy on you just because I like you. In fact, I may have to work you over harder than the other two in the match.
Scotty Callaway, Joe's brother James and Maria's father, Roger, are all sitting on the couch in the living room, beers in hand. They have Wiimotes and steering wheels sitting on their laps. Scotty and Roger are chugging their beers. After they finish they slam them down onto the coffee table.
James Everyman: You guys suck at drinking Mario Kart.
Scotty Callaway: You try it after shotgunning four beers.
James Everyman: I don't need to...I never seem to lose.
Roger Williams: Come on boys, let's just do another!
The game starts, Roger playing as Bowser, James as Daisy and Scotty as Yoshi. The camera looks at the screen for a second before panning back around to the couch.
Scotty Callaway: Did you guys see Joe last week?
James Everyman: Of course I did, he dominated.
Roger Williams: Yeah, he really is doing well for himself. But I was more proud of my daughter. Even though she didn't pull out the win, they did good.
James Everyman: Yeah she did, but I really hope Joe wins this week too. He really needs to keep this strive goi...damn red shells!
Scotty laughs, as it was his shell.
Scotty Callaway: Everything I learned on this game was from a friend of mine online, Adam Cole.
James Everyman: Is that the guy you met on that online dating website?
Roger takes his eyes off the screen for a second and looks at Scotty with a weird look on his face.
Scotty Callaway: Shut up James! That was an accident and you know it! And no, just a guy I know. He used to kick my ass at this game, but I was able to get pretty good at it.
Roger fires a bounced green shell and nails Scotty's cart with it.
Scotty Callaway: Son of a bitch...
James is able to cross the finish line first, with Roger in second and Scotty in third. James reaches down and hands Roger and Scotty another beer. Scotty throws his controller across the room and storms off.
Scotty Callaway: I hate this f*cking game...
Roger and James just shrug it off. They both crack open a beer.
James Everyman: For Joe?
Roger Williams: For Joe!
They clang their beers together and start to drink they again. Scotty then peeks in and snags another beer.
Scotty Callaway: I'm going to need this. I need to call that bastard Adam and give him what's what!
Seth Evans, what exactly is your claim to fame here in nCw? I know you have a slight bit of success in the company that shant be named. But here, you haven't been too impressive. We have beaten roughly the exact same people. That's really the only similarity we share. I have beaten Hall of Famers. You have beaten general managers. I have beaten World Champions, you have beaten up clowns. I have dethroned greats, I have crushed dreams, I have destroyed eras...you can't seem to grasp the fact that the X-Division Championship will never hang over your shoulder. Sure, you can keep trying, but it seems like Freakke has your number. You and him have been fighting it out since you joined nCw. And it seems like he is always able to get the upper hand on you.
You said this week that you are willing to do anything and everything to win in this company. And what happened last week? You lose, and low and behold, I won! And yet, you still come out this week saying how much better you are than me. Is that really true? Or are you being a dick for the sake of being a dick? Either way, it won't really phase me. I fight people like you every single week. I know how to counter everything you say, and everything you do in the ring. However, I won't compare you to the Academy. That would be very mean...to them. I haven't seen a more pathetic wrestler than you in a long time. I don't like you. I have never liked you. And out match this week is on the Fourth of July for god's sake. Do you really think I will allow a Canadian to win this week? Hell no! I would rather blow my left hand off with a bottle rocket than see a Canadian get any glory on OUR day!
I know you have your silly 'Canada Day' at some point this week. What exactly is that? Where you make bacon balls and cover each other in maple syrup? It sounds fun and all, but I would rather grill and drink and have a blast on our nation's biggest holiday. We have a saying here in America. If you won't wave out flag, get the f*ck back to your own damn country...or something like that. Nothing would make me happier this week than to make you eat all of your words this week. You aren't impressive to any of us. So please, do us all a favor and go back to Canada and resume being a mountie or whatever the hell you do for a living outside of this company. Maybe this time you'll choke on a piece of bacon.
Gabriel Karras, I have to hand it to you though, at least you are using our first amendment well. We have a freedom of religion in this country, and you are using it well. There is only one problem. You are so *** damn annoying with it, it makes me want to kick your teeth in. I really have no problem with you Gabriel, but you are just so annoying, I have to hate you. You're like the JBL of nCw. You can preach all you want. But, when you say that the Lord above is ashamed of me, well, that just opens a new door of pain. I am not the more religious man in the world, nothing compared to you, but I take offense to something like that. You have no right to pass around anybodies word, let along God's. So, please do us all a favor and cut the crap this week. And from now on for that matter.
God is going to have to come down here and stop these mother f*cking bullets for you to have any chance this week. Maybe now, after you finally quit nCw for being a failure, you can go back to doing your old job...touching little boys.
I am on a winning streak for the first time in a while. I just can't go and spoil it, can I? I am going to win my fifth straight and go into Picture Perfect with a HUGE load of confidence and determination. I am undefeated at Picture Perfect, so I can chalk on another win there. None of you can stop me on my path to becoming something great. The National Championship, the Tag Team Championships, the nCw World Championships...all of those would look great around my waist. Seth, Gabriel and even little Exclamation Point...none of you will ever be in my league. None of you will ever be able to compete at the level I am at right now. You three can keep trying and keep clawing up, but all of you will eventually fall. I have told the millions of nCw fans. I have told the countless that have fallen at my feet. I have told every man, woman and child in this world of ours to not question my heart. And I will show all of you why you should never question my heart, or the heart of America. I am the heart of America! I will fight for everyone American who has ever had a dream. I will fight for every foreigner who moved here to start anew. I will fight for everyone I have ever loved. I will fight for life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness![/b]
While the storm clouds gather far across the sea,
Let us swear allegiance to a land that's free,
Let us all be grateful for a land so fair,
As we raise our voices in a solemn prayer.
God Bless America,
Land that I love.
Stand beside her, and guide her
Through the night with a light from above.
From the mountains, to the prairies,
To the oceans, white with foam
God bless America, My home sweet home.
Let us swear allegiance to a land that's free,
Let us all be grateful for a land so fair,
As we raise our voices in a solemn prayer.
God Bless America,
Land that I love.
Stand beside her, and guide her
Through the night with a light from above.
From the mountains, to the prairies,
To the oceans, white with foam
God bless America, My home sweet home.