Post by Ricky Johnson on Oct 29, 2011 17:26:43 GMT -6
I always wondered if I was capable of hating anyone.
Hate is a really strong word we use for very trivial things, you know? We hate certain foods, certain sports teams, bugs, anything under the sun that we just don’t like…we say hate.
I didn’t think I would ever really hate anybody. I’ve meet a large number of people over the years and I’ve never felt hatred for any of them. Sure, there were some douche bags every now and again, that’s life. You just deal with those people and move on. Maybe you punch them in the nose or something, but you get over it. Maybe someone gets on your last nerve, maybe they’re good at pushing buttons, maybe they’re just assholes. But do you hate that person?
An old mentor of mine gave me a scenario about hate: Picture the person you supposedly hate. Now picture yourself and that person in the same place, and they are lying in a heap before you.
You have caused it. They lay on the ground broken, bleeding, all the damage was caused by you. And you look down, and in your hands is a weapon. A gun, a knife, whatever.
And now, you have a choice to make: Do you hate this person enough to end their life? Is your hatred so strong that you would KILL that person?
My answer was always “No.”
When he asked why not, I said that people cannot help who they are. It’s in their blood. And if I hated a person enough to beat them that badly, I would be satisfied with the result. I would feel like I proved a point.
He always chuckled. “But even if you feel you proved a point, would that person understand? what would stop them from continuing to make your life miserable, or whatever it was that made you hate them?”
“Nothing.”
“Then why not kill them Why take chances?”
“Because I am not a monster. And no matter who they are, they are human beings.”
The conversation always ended there. He would say that I did not hate.
But not that I was incapable.
Even still, I wondered if I even could.
Thank you Jim. For answering that question for me.
Ricky - This is delicious Mrs. Jamison
Robin – Please, Ricky, you can call me Robin. You’re part of the family.
Ricky - Okay.
Robin – So, have you found out what you’re having sweetheart?
Roxi - I just know it’s twins. It’s still too early to tell.
John – Twins. Two strong boys would be wonderful.
Roxi - Why not girls, Daddy?
John – Girls are difficult to raise, Roxi.
Ricky - YES! I told you.
John – Told her what?
Ricky - Girls are more difficult to raise.
Robin – Well, no need to get all excited, I know that I’ll be happy no matter what. Right, dear?
John – Yes, dear.
...
John – So Rick, you’re taking all the precautions right?
Ricky - Absolutely.
Roxi - I go to the doctor more frequently now. Have to get periodic ultrasounds.
John – That’s good, you take care of my daughter, you hear?
Ricky - No problem.
John – [Whispering] Because if you don’t…I’ll hunt you down. Comprede’
Ricky - Loud and clear.
John – [Whispering] Good
Robin – What are you boys talking about?
John – How wonderful this ham is dear.
Ricky - [muttering] Why me?
I think I was pretty close to discovering why you don’t like me. As I said, you want to be me. You want your name on everyone’s mind. You want to be “evolutionary” or whatever buzz word you think sounds cool. You want the people to love you, to respect you. You want to be great. Sadly, as you prove time and time again, you are none of those things.
Recently, you said that you would not even want to challenge Xander if he defeated Steve Awesome this Sunday. Nope, not you, huh Jim? You want to be nowhere near the world title after Sunday.
You are a coward.
How can you expect to be anything that you want to be, by cowering like a bitch when the challenge arises? But I forget that’s always been you. The chicken-hawk who loves war but won’t jump in himself. The arm-chair quarterback who swears up and down that he could play better. Yes, that sounds like you. Fits you like a glove, I’d say.
But that’s not me. That’s the biggest difference between you and I. I fight. I have been a war for a long time now, and I’m not going to be intimidated out of a fight regardless of who the champion is. I will not stop until the world championship is around my waist, a goal I will accomplish before I’m done.
A goal I should have already accomplished.
Now you can listen to me, and tell the people that you don’t care what they think, nor what I said. And guess what? That’s load a bull**** too. You do care. You’ve been trying to get these people on your side all this week. Telling everyone that you are the future. That you are so much better. And…you actually have the BALLS to say that I am a failure. And that you beat me before.
Wow man. Revisionist history ho!
I’m a failure? Compared to who? I’ve won more titles here than anyone. And yes, that anyone include you, Jim.
I beat you before, in your debut match no less. And to think I had high hopes for you at one point.
Well, never said I was perfect.
Whew. And here I thought I wouldn’t have anything to talk about with you.
John – Rick, been watch the NCW lately, good work by you. You gonna be ready for this Zane character?
Ricky - Absolutely.
Roxi - Ricky’s always ready.
John – Is that right? Is he ready to be a father.?
Ricky - Well…
Robin – I don’t you were ready either dear.
John – Nonsense. I was ready.
Robin – Every man has to grow into fatherhood Ricky. Don’t let Mr. pride over there fool you. He was as nervous as could be.
Ricky - Well, that at least makes me feel a little better.
John – Rick, you gotta be ready for those long, sleepless nights. I mean, one baby is tough enough, but two? Can you make that kind of commitment?
Ricky - I will. But I have 8 months to prepare, I think I'll be okay. We'll be okay. I love your daughter, my wife, very much. There's a few things like Jimmy Zane that I have to take care of first, but once my children are here...I will be there for them.
I have come to understand something very important this week, Jim.
I HATE you.
Yes. You are the sole reason that I realized that I am capable of hatred.
Everything you do, everything you say, irritates me to no end.
Just the mere fact that you breathe? It really upsets me.
The idea that you think you’re so intelligent and witty and clever? It bugs me.
Yes, you can go ahead and pat yourself on the back Jim. You’ve gotten to me. You’re in my head. You’re under my skin. I’m pretty much seeing red every time I think about you. It’s just that bad.
And I’m not the only one. Do you know how many texts, and tweets I’ve gotten in the past week, letting me know that they want you destroyed?
Just so they don’t have to kill themselves by watching anymore Jimmy Zane segments?
You can prevent suicides, Jim! Think of it.
But you already knew that right? Everyone hates you. And you’re so cool because you don’t care, right? It doesn’t bother you, right? You’ll happily take on the role of the bad guy because you’re so holier than thou that you’ll rise above it right?
Ha. You make me laugh all the time Jim. Never a dull moment with you.
But all that Hate, soak that all in.
I want you to fully realize what your in for. You are in for a long night. But I’m not totally heartless, you know.
I’m giving serious consideration to beating you into unconsciousness, and then letting you pin me because I don’t want the National title. It’ll be the nicest thing I ever do for you, minus that one time where I carried you in a tag match to a victory.
…
Nah, never mind. I’m just going to beat you like a dusty rug and call it a day. The National title shot could be a bargining chip down the road. It’s better in my hands that it would ever be in yours.
Yes, I cannot allow you to have anything even remotely resembling success. I just can’t. I hate you that much.
So much, that in your case…
I will look you square in the eyes, and let the last thing you see be my smiling face.
Then… I pull the trigger.
Hate is a really strong word we use for very trivial things, you know? We hate certain foods, certain sports teams, bugs, anything under the sun that we just don’t like…we say hate.
I didn’t think I would ever really hate anybody. I’ve meet a large number of people over the years and I’ve never felt hatred for any of them. Sure, there were some douche bags every now and again, that’s life. You just deal with those people and move on. Maybe you punch them in the nose or something, but you get over it. Maybe someone gets on your last nerve, maybe they’re good at pushing buttons, maybe they’re just assholes. But do you hate that person?
An old mentor of mine gave me a scenario about hate: Picture the person you supposedly hate. Now picture yourself and that person in the same place, and they are lying in a heap before you.
You have caused it. They lay on the ground broken, bleeding, all the damage was caused by you. And you look down, and in your hands is a weapon. A gun, a knife, whatever.
And now, you have a choice to make: Do you hate this person enough to end their life? Is your hatred so strong that you would KILL that person?
My answer was always “No.”
When he asked why not, I said that people cannot help who they are. It’s in their blood. And if I hated a person enough to beat them that badly, I would be satisfied with the result. I would feel like I proved a point.
He always chuckled. “But even if you feel you proved a point, would that person understand? what would stop them from continuing to make your life miserable, or whatever it was that made you hate them?”
“Nothing.”
“Then why not kill them Why take chances?”
“Because I am not a monster. And no matter who they are, they are human beings.”
The conversation always ended there. He would say that I did not hate.
But not that I was incapable.
Even still, I wondered if I even could.
Thank you Jim. For answering that question for me.
Ricky - This is delicious Mrs. Jamison
Robin – Please, Ricky, you can call me Robin. You’re part of the family.
Ricky - Okay.
Robin – So, have you found out what you’re having sweetheart?
Roxi - I just know it’s twins. It’s still too early to tell.
John – Twins. Two strong boys would be wonderful.
Roxi - Why not girls, Daddy?
John – Girls are difficult to raise, Roxi.
Ricky - YES! I told you.
John – Told her what?
Ricky - Girls are more difficult to raise.
Robin – Well, no need to get all excited, I know that I’ll be happy no matter what. Right, dear?
John – Yes, dear.
...
John – So Rick, you’re taking all the precautions right?
Ricky - Absolutely.
Roxi - I go to the doctor more frequently now. Have to get periodic ultrasounds.
John – That’s good, you take care of my daughter, you hear?
Ricky - No problem.
John – [Whispering] Because if you don’t…I’ll hunt you down. Comprede’
Ricky - Loud and clear.
John – [Whispering] Good
Robin – What are you boys talking about?
John – How wonderful this ham is dear.
Ricky - [muttering] Why me?
I think I was pretty close to discovering why you don’t like me. As I said, you want to be me. You want your name on everyone’s mind. You want to be “evolutionary” or whatever buzz word you think sounds cool. You want the people to love you, to respect you. You want to be great. Sadly, as you prove time and time again, you are none of those things.
Recently, you said that you would not even want to challenge Xander if he defeated Steve Awesome this Sunday. Nope, not you, huh Jim? You want to be nowhere near the world title after Sunday.
You are a coward.
How can you expect to be anything that you want to be, by cowering like a bitch when the challenge arises? But I forget that’s always been you. The chicken-hawk who loves war but won’t jump in himself. The arm-chair quarterback who swears up and down that he could play better. Yes, that sounds like you. Fits you like a glove, I’d say.
But that’s not me. That’s the biggest difference between you and I. I fight. I have been a war for a long time now, and I’m not going to be intimidated out of a fight regardless of who the champion is. I will not stop until the world championship is around my waist, a goal I will accomplish before I’m done.
A goal I should have already accomplished.
Now you can listen to me, and tell the people that you don’t care what they think, nor what I said. And guess what? That’s load a bull**** too. You do care. You’ve been trying to get these people on your side all this week. Telling everyone that you are the future. That you are so much better. And…you actually have the BALLS to say that I am a failure. And that you beat me before.
Wow man. Revisionist history ho!
I’m a failure? Compared to who? I’ve won more titles here than anyone. And yes, that anyone include you, Jim.
I beat you before, in your debut match no less. And to think I had high hopes for you at one point.
Well, never said I was perfect.
Whew. And here I thought I wouldn’t have anything to talk about with you.
John – Rick, been watch the NCW lately, good work by you. You gonna be ready for this Zane character?
Ricky - Absolutely.
Roxi - Ricky’s always ready.
John – Is that right? Is he ready to be a father.?
Ricky - Well…
Robin – I don’t you were ready either dear.
John – Nonsense. I was ready.
Robin – Every man has to grow into fatherhood Ricky. Don’t let Mr. pride over there fool you. He was as nervous as could be.
Ricky - Well, that at least makes me feel a little better.
John – Rick, you gotta be ready for those long, sleepless nights. I mean, one baby is tough enough, but two? Can you make that kind of commitment?
Ricky - I will. But I have 8 months to prepare, I think I'll be okay. We'll be okay. I love your daughter, my wife, very much. There's a few things like Jimmy Zane that I have to take care of first, but once my children are here...I will be there for them.
I have come to understand something very important this week, Jim.
I HATE you.
Yes. You are the sole reason that I realized that I am capable of hatred.
Everything you do, everything you say, irritates me to no end.
Just the mere fact that you breathe? It really upsets me.
The idea that you think you’re so intelligent and witty and clever? It bugs me.
Yes, you can go ahead and pat yourself on the back Jim. You’ve gotten to me. You’re in my head. You’re under my skin. I’m pretty much seeing red every time I think about you. It’s just that bad.
And I’m not the only one. Do you know how many texts, and tweets I’ve gotten in the past week, letting me know that they want you destroyed?
Just so they don’t have to kill themselves by watching anymore Jimmy Zane segments?
You can prevent suicides, Jim! Think of it.
But you already knew that right? Everyone hates you. And you’re so cool because you don’t care, right? It doesn’t bother you, right? You’ll happily take on the role of the bad guy because you’re so holier than thou that you’ll rise above it right?
Ha. You make me laugh all the time Jim. Never a dull moment with you.
But all that Hate, soak that all in.
I want you to fully realize what your in for. You are in for a long night. But I’m not totally heartless, you know.
I’m giving serious consideration to beating you into unconsciousness, and then letting you pin me because I don’t want the National title. It’ll be the nicest thing I ever do for you, minus that one time where I carried you in a tag match to a victory.
…
Nah, never mind. I’m just going to beat you like a dusty rug and call it a day. The National title shot could be a bargining chip down the road. It’s better in my hands that it would ever be in yours.
Yes, I cannot allow you to have anything even remotely resembling success. I just can’t. I hate you that much.
So much, that in your case…
I will look you square in the eyes, and let the last thing you see be my smiling face.
Then… I pull the trigger.