Post by Markus E. Reeves on Oct 30, 2011 1:35:32 GMT -6
The scene opens up on a sunny day in New York City. Mark Evil and Matt Jackson are outside enjoying a beer and the sound of yelling and chanting can be heard from below the balcony that Mark and Matt sit on.
Matt Jackson: How long have they been here?
Mark Evil: A few days. It really pissed them off when you ignore them. We all know that they are just here to get attention. Just like Bates' is "gay" to get people to think he is still relevant which he isn't.
Matt Jackson: I'm surprised they aren't trying to knock down your door for what you said about Bates.
Mark Evil: Come on Matt. This is Bates were talking about. He is about as relevant to the gay community as Frankie Munez is to the acting community. It's not like I went out and made fun of Lady Gaga for having a penis or bashing her for her support of gays. Now if I did that I would find it perfectly acceptable for them to knock down my door and destroy me but seriously this is Bates. On the list of gay wrestlers and celebrities and there ranking in the gay community he ranks down somewhere around the bottom of that ranking list.
Matt Jackson: Are you worried about facing him this week?
Mark Evil: Sure I am. The guy used to be a pretty good wrestler so he could try and surprise me by returning to his former self...just in much gayer packaging.
Matt Jackson: Speaking of gay packaging did you see his hair in that last promo?
Mark Evil: Yeah. Not only was it creepy looking but honestly who does there hair to workout?
Matt Jackson: No one who really cares about working out. I'm sure he was doing other things in that dimly lit gym before the cameras got there.
Mark Evil: I'm sure he was. He was probably working his arms out another way.
Mark and Matt both have a laugh and realize it has gone silent down below. Both men look over the railing and see the protesters sitting down eating lunch. The protesters look up and see Jackson and Evil looking back at them and they stand up and start throwing there lunch at the two men on the balcony. Evil and Jackson duck to avoid getting hit.
Mark Evil: Why the hell are you protesting me? You guys are in the right state now but Xander doesn't live here. He lives near Lake Ontario.
Guy: No, were in the right place now. You made fun of Bates.
Mark Evil: So..... I don't see the big deal of making fun of someone who is faking being gay to get attention.
Guy: He isn't faking it. Being gay isn't a choice its just who we are.
Mark Evil: Except when it comes to Bates who was married and had kids.
Guy: He was living a lie and now he is who he is. Hey...you are Matt Jackson aren't you supposed to be down here with us?
Matt Jackson: What?
Guy: You are totally gay and one of us.
Matt Jackson responds in a defensive tone
Matt Jackson: THAT WAS JUST A RUMOR! I LIKE TITTIES
The scene fades to black and the scene fades back in with Mark Evil in his living room. Mark is sitting on his black leather sofa and his TV is off
The first thing I'm going to address Bates is your use of big words. You make a big deal about using them and that anyone who doesn't use big words are inferior compared to you. I'm going to strongly disagree because while I watched your promo's from a few weeks ago against Xander I couldn't help but notice that while you were using big words you seemed to be using those words when they were completely unnecessary. If you took the meaning of the large word and put it into the sentence the sentence would make no sense. The next point about it also is why would people need to use big words when conducting a promo for wrestling. If I remember correctly wrestling is a barbaric sport contested between two warriors who's intent is to destroy the other combatant. This isn't a chess match between two nerds. Words are just words unless you decide to man up and back them up.
Yeah I was probably wrong in stereotyping gay people as people that wear pink and like Glee. I was wrong but not nearly as wrong as you were. You decided to take stereotyping to the racist angle. I mean not all Mexican's do lawn work and I'm actually pretty shocked that you didn't say that "if I was black I would eat fried chicken and drink purple beverages."
Hell, I'm surprised you didn't. I guess I didn't realize that when you said that you were no longer going to lie to everyone about your sexual orientation that it would also reveal a deep seeded racism. I wonder what else we could uncover if we dig deep enough into your brain. I'm sure we could find all sorts of wonderful stuff like that you molest children or are secretly Canadian.
You also said that I didn't live by the rules that society has told us to live by. To get a job, go to college, get married and have kids. I guess you haven't seen any of my promos for lets just say the last year. You would realize that I have a job since I'm wrestling you this week, I was married until a few months ago, I have three kids and I am a college graduate. Maybe you just didn't seem to care about these little facts because you don't want to come to terms with the fact maybe I'm more successful than you are. You pretty much made all the stereotype jokes that I didn't except that all the people from India are doing all the IT jobs now. Oh wait you decided to neglect that one because they took your job away from you. Maybe that's because they are better at that job than you were. I'm not going to assume that because that's the stereotype I'm just going to assume that because right now some guy in India is doing your old job better than you could. Just like this week I'm going to do your job better than you can and I'm going to defeat you this week whether I have weapons to use or not.
I found it funny that you said that you would rather being going for the National Championship or the X Championship. So what you are telling me is that you would rather be going for the National Championship, a title that has been held by Joe Everyman three times. The fact that Joe has held that title three times means that it is pretty much a **** title in your eyes since you think that Joe Everyman has held the title that many times. You basically want to go for a title that no one cares about because Joe is pretty much the most famous National Champion ever and he sucks. Speaking of Joe Everyman, I noticed that you were talking about Joe a lot this week. Makes me think that maybe you have the hots for him. I mean you both are single now so why not take a shot at him. He is down on his luck and you could help get him back up.
Mark laughs
Did you see what I did there Bates? My guess is that you did because you are soooooooo intelligent.
Mark says the previous line with a heavy layer of sarcasm
You also said that you want to go for the X Championship. You basically want to try and relive you glory as a hardcore wrestler by winning the watered down, bastardized version of the Xtreme title. I guess it fits you perfectly. A watered down title for a watered down and washed up version of yourself Bates. I guess I'm not surprised. You will probably take any short cut you can just so that you can regain some of your former glory. Me, however, I'm going for being things in my life. I want to be world champion. I want to finally make something of myself and make my family proud of myself. Bates I'm going to beat you badly this week. I don't have much time left in the ring so I need to make them count and you are just a stepping stone on my way to the title.
The scene fades out and back into Mark Evil standing in front of a house. Two kegs sit beside him and two woman stand beside him dressed as Spartan woman. Mark is dressed as King Leonidas from 300. The two woman climb up onto his shoulders and he picks up a keg in in each hand and walks toward the party and into the backyard where the party has already begun.
Mark Evil: SPARTANS, PREPARE TO PARTY!!!
Mark sets the two kegs down and the two woman climb down. Mark hands them some money and tells them to get lost. Gib walks up to Mark.
Gib: Nice to see you could make it Mark since you are such a busy guy these days.
Mark Evil: It's nice to be here. Hell of a party you got going on here.
Gib: It is quite the party. Nice to see these guys outside the ring.
Mark Evil: Yeah, I saw this guys dressed like Yoshi walking around early. I wonder who that was?
Gib: I know exactly who that is. Someone who wasn't invited to this party. I'm liking what you are doing. I hope to see some good things from.
Mark Evil: Thanks. That means a lot coming from you. Where do you want me to put these kegs?
Gib: Just put them by the rest of the booze.
Mark picks up the kegs and carries them over to what can only be described as the greatest collection of booze the world has ever seen
Mark Evil: And I am home!
The scene fades to black
Matt Jackson: How long have they been here?
Mark Evil: A few days. It really pissed them off when you ignore them. We all know that they are just here to get attention. Just like Bates' is "gay" to get people to think he is still relevant which he isn't.
Matt Jackson: I'm surprised they aren't trying to knock down your door for what you said about Bates.
Mark Evil: Come on Matt. This is Bates were talking about. He is about as relevant to the gay community as Frankie Munez is to the acting community. It's not like I went out and made fun of Lady Gaga for having a penis or bashing her for her support of gays. Now if I did that I would find it perfectly acceptable for them to knock down my door and destroy me but seriously this is Bates. On the list of gay wrestlers and celebrities and there ranking in the gay community he ranks down somewhere around the bottom of that ranking list.
Matt Jackson: Are you worried about facing him this week?
Mark Evil: Sure I am. The guy used to be a pretty good wrestler so he could try and surprise me by returning to his former self...just in much gayer packaging.
Matt Jackson: Speaking of gay packaging did you see his hair in that last promo?
Mark Evil: Yeah. Not only was it creepy looking but honestly who does there hair to workout?
Matt Jackson: No one who really cares about working out. I'm sure he was doing other things in that dimly lit gym before the cameras got there.
Mark Evil: I'm sure he was. He was probably working his arms out another way.
Mark and Matt both have a laugh and realize it has gone silent down below. Both men look over the railing and see the protesters sitting down eating lunch. The protesters look up and see Jackson and Evil looking back at them and they stand up and start throwing there lunch at the two men on the balcony. Evil and Jackson duck to avoid getting hit.
Mark Evil: Why the hell are you protesting me? You guys are in the right state now but Xander doesn't live here. He lives near Lake Ontario.
Guy: No, were in the right place now. You made fun of Bates.
Mark Evil: So..... I don't see the big deal of making fun of someone who is faking being gay to get attention.
Guy: He isn't faking it. Being gay isn't a choice its just who we are.
Mark Evil: Except when it comes to Bates who was married and had kids.
Guy: He was living a lie and now he is who he is. Hey...you are Matt Jackson aren't you supposed to be down here with us?
Matt Jackson: What?
Guy: You are totally gay and one of us.
Matt Jackson responds in a defensive tone
Matt Jackson: THAT WAS JUST A RUMOR! I LIKE TITTIES
The scene fades to black and the scene fades back in with Mark Evil in his living room. Mark is sitting on his black leather sofa and his TV is off
The first thing I'm going to address Bates is your use of big words. You make a big deal about using them and that anyone who doesn't use big words are inferior compared to you. I'm going to strongly disagree because while I watched your promo's from a few weeks ago against Xander I couldn't help but notice that while you were using big words you seemed to be using those words when they were completely unnecessary. If you took the meaning of the large word and put it into the sentence the sentence would make no sense. The next point about it also is why would people need to use big words when conducting a promo for wrestling. If I remember correctly wrestling is a barbaric sport contested between two warriors who's intent is to destroy the other combatant. This isn't a chess match between two nerds. Words are just words unless you decide to man up and back them up.
Yeah I was probably wrong in stereotyping gay people as people that wear pink and like Glee. I was wrong but not nearly as wrong as you were. You decided to take stereotyping to the racist angle. I mean not all Mexican's do lawn work and I'm actually pretty shocked that you didn't say that "if I was black I would eat fried chicken and drink purple beverages."
Hell, I'm surprised you didn't. I guess I didn't realize that when you said that you were no longer going to lie to everyone about your sexual orientation that it would also reveal a deep seeded racism. I wonder what else we could uncover if we dig deep enough into your brain. I'm sure we could find all sorts of wonderful stuff like that you molest children or are secretly Canadian.
You also said that I didn't live by the rules that society has told us to live by. To get a job, go to college, get married and have kids. I guess you haven't seen any of my promos for lets just say the last year. You would realize that I have a job since I'm wrestling you this week, I was married until a few months ago, I have three kids and I am a college graduate. Maybe you just didn't seem to care about these little facts because you don't want to come to terms with the fact maybe I'm more successful than you are. You pretty much made all the stereotype jokes that I didn't except that all the people from India are doing all the IT jobs now. Oh wait you decided to neglect that one because they took your job away from you. Maybe that's because they are better at that job than you were. I'm not going to assume that because that's the stereotype I'm just going to assume that because right now some guy in India is doing your old job better than you could. Just like this week I'm going to do your job better than you can and I'm going to defeat you this week whether I have weapons to use or not.
I found it funny that you said that you would rather being going for the National Championship or the X Championship. So what you are telling me is that you would rather be going for the National Championship, a title that has been held by Joe Everyman three times. The fact that Joe has held that title three times means that it is pretty much a **** title in your eyes since you think that Joe Everyman has held the title that many times. You basically want to go for a title that no one cares about because Joe is pretty much the most famous National Champion ever and he sucks. Speaking of Joe Everyman, I noticed that you were talking about Joe a lot this week. Makes me think that maybe you have the hots for him. I mean you both are single now so why not take a shot at him. He is down on his luck and you could help get him back up.
Mark laughs
Did you see what I did there Bates? My guess is that you did because you are soooooooo intelligent.
Mark says the previous line with a heavy layer of sarcasm
You also said that you want to go for the X Championship. You basically want to try and relive you glory as a hardcore wrestler by winning the watered down, bastardized version of the Xtreme title. I guess it fits you perfectly. A watered down title for a watered down and washed up version of yourself Bates. I guess I'm not surprised. You will probably take any short cut you can just so that you can regain some of your former glory. Me, however, I'm going for being things in my life. I want to be world champion. I want to finally make something of myself and make my family proud of myself. Bates I'm going to beat you badly this week. I don't have much time left in the ring so I need to make them count and you are just a stepping stone on my way to the title.
The scene fades out and back into Mark Evil standing in front of a house. Two kegs sit beside him and two woman stand beside him dressed as Spartan woman. Mark is dressed as King Leonidas from 300. The two woman climb up onto his shoulders and he picks up a keg in in each hand and walks toward the party and into the backyard where the party has already begun.
Mark Evil: SPARTANS, PREPARE TO PARTY!!!
Mark sets the two kegs down and the two woman climb down. Mark hands them some money and tells them to get lost. Gib walks up to Mark.
Gib: Nice to see you could make it Mark since you are such a busy guy these days.
Mark Evil: It's nice to be here. Hell of a party you got going on here.
Gib: It is quite the party. Nice to see these guys outside the ring.
Mark Evil: Yeah, I saw this guys dressed like Yoshi walking around early. I wonder who that was?
Gib: I know exactly who that is. Someone who wasn't invited to this party. I'm liking what you are doing. I hope to see some good things from.
Mark Evil: Thanks. That means a lot coming from you. Where do you want me to put these kegs?
Gib: Just put them by the rest of the booze.
Mark picks up the kegs and carries them over to what can only be described as the greatest collection of booze the world has ever seen
Mark Evil: And I am home!
The scene fades to black
