Post by Mike Honcho on Sept 27, 2008 14:41:51 GMT -6
The scene opens with Mike standing in front of a NCW drop down banner with a very confident grin on his face.
Mike: Hey guys! What’s up? I bet some of you guys are wondering where I was last week.
An unseen wrestler walks behind the camera and loudly states, “No, we weren’t…”
Honcho: Hey man, you go to hell and you die! Yeah, keep on walking hard @$$! Anyways, like what I was saying, last week I was suspended for flipping off fans, punching a homeless man, and tea bagging a blind man’s drink. As I think back to that fateful day, I wish I had known the blind man was drinking hot coffee before I put my stuff in it. But what’s done is done. I lost my cool for a moment and I took it out on the people who makes all this happen. So I’d like to apologize to the fans. I’m sorry you are all white trash and don’t know a good thing when you see it. You piece of crap fans are holding me back from going to the top. When you boo me, you boo America! And when you boo America, the Fox family doesn’t like that. So I’m not getting any respect or title shots around here and it’s because of you idiot fans. I looked at the card and I see Jack Hammond getting a title shot. I remember getting run over by a car a few days before our match and I still won. I’m not dissing Hammond; he’s a great man and an even better wrestler… (Mike becomes completely irate and starts yelling) BUT I BEAT HIM! HE LOST TO ME, ONE TWO THREE! NOW, I’M PUT ON THE PRE-SHOW?!?! I’M GONING TO GET RESPECT FORM HERE ON OUT! YOU WAIT AND SEE! YOU WILL BOW TO ME AND THEN YOUR KIDS WILL BOW TO ME!
After taking a few deep breathes, he calms himself down.
MH: It all starts with you; Mr. (long pause) who do I fight again?
An off camera News whispers: Tommy The Cat!
The camera starts to pan to get a shot of the still healing News but the very vain man stifled the cameraman’s attempt and scolds him for trying.
Mike: Tommy The Cat? Who the hell is that?
News: (whispering) He’s new and thinks he’s a cat. Hints “The Cat” in his name. That’s all I could find on the guy, so keep going!
Honcho: How? I mean, I do the disrespecting thing that was pretty powerful and then I’m supposed to talk about this guy? He thinks he’s a cat! Come on, this is what I’m talking about. After I get done with this joke of a match, I’ll be in the back waiting for my best friend, Phil Burns, to win his match. Then me and him can go party!
At that moment, Phil Burns happens to be walking by the chain link fence that separates the parking garage from where the promo was being cut.
Burns: You’re not my friend, you meatloaf cooking homo!
After hearing that, Mike runs over to the fence and place his face as far into the tiny holes as he can. The News takes off jogging in the other direction.
MH: Hey Burning! You’re my best friend! Hey, I love you!
Burning: What?!?
Honcho: Nothing! I’ll talk to you later! By the way, who was that pretty lady in your flash back I saw?
That’s when Burns runs to the fence and kicks it causing it to “rattle” Honcho. The scene fades with Honcho chasing after Phil on foot as Burns drives off.
Mike: Hey guys! What’s up? I bet some of you guys are wondering where I was last week.
An unseen wrestler walks behind the camera and loudly states, “No, we weren’t…”
Honcho: Hey man, you go to hell and you die! Yeah, keep on walking hard @$$! Anyways, like what I was saying, last week I was suspended for flipping off fans, punching a homeless man, and tea bagging a blind man’s drink. As I think back to that fateful day, I wish I had known the blind man was drinking hot coffee before I put my stuff in it. But what’s done is done. I lost my cool for a moment and I took it out on the people who makes all this happen. So I’d like to apologize to the fans. I’m sorry you are all white trash and don’t know a good thing when you see it. You piece of crap fans are holding me back from going to the top. When you boo me, you boo America! And when you boo America, the Fox family doesn’t like that. So I’m not getting any respect or title shots around here and it’s because of you idiot fans. I looked at the card and I see Jack Hammond getting a title shot. I remember getting run over by a car a few days before our match and I still won. I’m not dissing Hammond; he’s a great man and an even better wrestler… (Mike becomes completely irate and starts yelling) BUT I BEAT HIM! HE LOST TO ME, ONE TWO THREE! NOW, I’M PUT ON THE PRE-SHOW?!?! I’M GONING TO GET RESPECT FORM HERE ON OUT! YOU WAIT AND SEE! YOU WILL BOW TO ME AND THEN YOUR KIDS WILL BOW TO ME!
After taking a few deep breathes, he calms himself down.
MH: It all starts with you; Mr. (long pause) who do I fight again?
An off camera News whispers: Tommy The Cat!
The camera starts to pan to get a shot of the still healing News but the very vain man stifled the cameraman’s attempt and scolds him for trying.
Mike: Tommy The Cat? Who the hell is that?
News: (whispering) He’s new and thinks he’s a cat. Hints “The Cat” in his name. That’s all I could find on the guy, so keep going!
Honcho: How? I mean, I do the disrespecting thing that was pretty powerful and then I’m supposed to talk about this guy? He thinks he’s a cat! Come on, this is what I’m talking about. After I get done with this joke of a match, I’ll be in the back waiting for my best friend, Phil Burns, to win his match. Then me and him can go party!
At that moment, Phil Burns happens to be walking by the chain link fence that separates the parking garage from where the promo was being cut.
Burns: You’re not my friend, you meatloaf cooking homo!
After hearing that, Mike runs over to the fence and place his face as far into the tiny holes as he can. The News takes off jogging in the other direction.
MH: Hey Burning! You’re my best friend! Hey, I love you!
Burning: What?!?
Honcho: Nothing! I’ll talk to you later! By the way, who was that pretty lady in your flash back I saw?
That’s when Burns runs to the fence and kicks it causing it to “rattle” Honcho. The scene fades with Honcho chasing after Phil on foot as Burns drives off.