Post by Mike Honcho on Sept 27, 2008 16:09:37 GMT -6
The scene opens with a camera crew riding in Mike Honcho’s newer car. It’s a ’97 Honda Civic. Being that it’s a small car, all the men in it are very cramped and the crew becomes vexed at the Honcho idea to do a promo in his tiny car.
Cameraman: Can we get this going? I can taste my nuts I’m so cramped in here!
Mike: Sure, I’ll start right now. I bet some of you are wondering what I’m doing? I’m proving a point. I don’t even have to be completely focused to beat this Tommy “The Cat’’ dude. He is just a little man that is going to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. I’ve got something to prove! I’ve got to show that I’m not just a dummy, that I’m a main eventer. I will take on anybody on the roster and will either win or come very close to the victory. It doesn’t matter who it is, I’ll take them on. And…
That’s when a police vehicle behind Mike turns on it’s lights and siren. Mike mouths a dirty word and pulls over. The officer is noticeable short, about 5’5 but is a little on the heavy side. He walks up to the driver and asks for his identification.
Honcho: Is there something wrong, sir?
Cop: May I see your registration? Hurry up meow.
(With a confused smirk on his face) Mike: Yeah, here you go, sir.
Officer: Meow, any idea how fast you were going?
Mike: Are you replacing now with meow and you have a bet with somebody to see how many times you can do that? I think that’s pretty funny.
Cop: (upset now) Am I saying, “meow”? “Meow”? What do I look like to you? Do I look like a cat to you? Do you have any idea how much trouble you’re in meow?
The crew in the car, along with Honcho, begin to chuckle. The short Policeman gets an angry look and takes off his glasses and gets in Mikes face.
Officer: STOP THAT LAUGHING RIGHT MEOW!
Now the men in the car are biting their tongues to stop laughing and Mike is about to pass out from holding his breath to keep from laughing.
Cop: Meow tell me how fast you were going.
Mike(with a grin): I don’t know… Why don’t you tell me meow before I guess wrong. Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Everybody in the car burst out in laughter and the officer completely loses his cool.
Cop: Everybody out of the car right meow!
The hysterical laughter roars out of car as the men start to climb out. The cop gets as close has he can to Honcho’s face.
Cop: You think you’re so funny don’t you Mr. Honcho. You do realize that I do not have a camera in my cruiser and I can do what I want to you and nobody will ever question what I say happened. You still want to dance big boy?
MH: Are you asking me out on a date? Meow I don’t date guys. Ha!
The officer has heard enough and pulls out his taser and shocks Mike to the ground. As Honcho lays on the ground shaking, the officer starts to wiggle his hips and taught Honcho.
Cop: Do I look like a cat meow? I’m all nimble and quick. Am I hairy enough for you? Huh? Oh you can’t talk meow because… YOU GOT TASED!
Mike (grunting in a lot of pain): Did Tommy The Cat tell you to do this? Did he pay you?
Officer: Are you saying I can be bought? Are you saying I can be corrupted? Meow, I don’t think you’re in a position to accuse me of anything. Do you want to cooperate with me meow, or am I going to have to tase you again? Choose Meow.
MH: You go to hell and you d AHHHH!
The cop leans down and tases Honcho again. Smoke starts to rise from his skin and he continues to scream in pain.
Honcho: DON’T TASE ME BRO! PLEASE DON’T TASE ME, BRO! I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING… DON’T TASE ME BRO!
The cop leans down to tase Honcho again but radio chatter stops him before he makes contact.
Dispatcher: Attention all units, attention all units. We have a 187 at 325 North Main. Possible hostage situation, shots fired. All available units please respond over.
Officer: You’re lucky Honcho. I got to take this. Oh, by the way… (leans down and tases Mike one last time) Tommy The Cat did pay me to do all that. Have a nice day NOW.
The cop starts to walk to his cruiser and then runs back to the motionless Honcho and yells “MEOW!" before running to the cruiser and finally drives off.
Mike rolls over to look at the cameraman.
MH: Did you get all of that?
Cameraman: Yeah, I guess he didn’t even notice that I was recording. He was so focused on you he didn’t see us… You should sue man.
Honcho: I might. But for now I just want to hang on to it. I might need to black mail a cop into messing with somebody.
As the electrocuted Honcho staggers to his feet, the officers speeds by and yells “MEOW” out the window as he speeds by. The scene fades with the guys climbing back into the car.
Cameraman: Can we get this going? I can taste my nuts I’m so cramped in here!
Mike: Sure, I’ll start right now. I bet some of you are wondering what I’m doing? I’m proving a point. I don’t even have to be completely focused to beat this Tommy “The Cat’’ dude. He is just a little man that is going to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. I’ve got something to prove! I’ve got to show that I’m not just a dummy, that I’m a main eventer. I will take on anybody on the roster and will either win or come very close to the victory. It doesn’t matter who it is, I’ll take them on. And…
That’s when a police vehicle behind Mike turns on it’s lights and siren. Mike mouths a dirty word and pulls over. The officer is noticeable short, about 5’5 but is a little on the heavy side. He walks up to the driver and asks for his identification.
Honcho: Is there something wrong, sir?
Cop: May I see your registration? Hurry up meow.
(With a confused smirk on his face) Mike: Yeah, here you go, sir.
Officer: Meow, any idea how fast you were going?
Mike: Are you replacing now with meow and you have a bet with somebody to see how many times you can do that? I think that’s pretty funny.
Cop: (upset now) Am I saying, “meow”? “Meow”? What do I look like to you? Do I look like a cat to you? Do you have any idea how much trouble you’re in meow?
The crew in the car, along with Honcho, begin to chuckle. The short Policeman gets an angry look and takes off his glasses and gets in Mikes face.
Officer: STOP THAT LAUGHING RIGHT MEOW!
Now the men in the car are biting their tongues to stop laughing and Mike is about to pass out from holding his breath to keep from laughing.
Cop: Meow tell me how fast you were going.
Mike(with a grin): I don’t know… Why don’t you tell me meow before I guess wrong. Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Everybody in the car burst out in laughter and the officer completely loses his cool.
Cop: Everybody out of the car right meow!
The hysterical laughter roars out of car as the men start to climb out. The cop gets as close has he can to Honcho’s face.
Cop: You think you’re so funny don’t you Mr. Honcho. You do realize that I do not have a camera in my cruiser and I can do what I want to you and nobody will ever question what I say happened. You still want to dance big boy?
MH: Are you asking me out on a date? Meow I don’t date guys. Ha!
The officer has heard enough and pulls out his taser and shocks Mike to the ground. As Honcho lays on the ground shaking, the officer starts to wiggle his hips and taught Honcho.
Cop: Do I look like a cat meow? I’m all nimble and quick. Am I hairy enough for you? Huh? Oh you can’t talk meow because… YOU GOT TASED!
Mike (grunting in a lot of pain): Did Tommy The Cat tell you to do this? Did he pay you?
Officer: Are you saying I can be bought? Are you saying I can be corrupted? Meow, I don’t think you’re in a position to accuse me of anything. Do you want to cooperate with me meow, or am I going to have to tase you again? Choose Meow.
MH: You go to hell and you d AHHHH!
The cop leans down and tases Honcho again. Smoke starts to rise from his skin and he continues to scream in pain.
Honcho: DON’T TASE ME BRO! PLEASE DON’T TASE ME, BRO! I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING… DON’T TASE ME BRO!
The cop leans down to tase Honcho again but radio chatter stops him before he makes contact.
Dispatcher: Attention all units, attention all units. We have a 187 at 325 North Main. Possible hostage situation, shots fired. All available units please respond over.
Officer: You’re lucky Honcho. I got to take this. Oh, by the way… (leans down and tases Mike one last time) Tommy The Cat did pay me to do all that. Have a nice day NOW.
The cop starts to walk to his cruiser and then runs back to the motionless Honcho and yells “MEOW!" before running to the cruiser and finally drives off.
Mike rolls over to look at the cameraman.
MH: Did you get all of that?
Cameraman: Yeah, I guess he didn’t even notice that I was recording. He was so focused on you he didn’t see us… You should sue man.
Honcho: I might. But for now I just want to hang on to it. I might need to black mail a cop into messing with somebody.
As the electrocuted Honcho staggers to his feet, the officers speeds by and yells “MEOW” out the window as he speeds by. The scene fades with the guys climbing back into the car.