Post by Chris Phere on Oct 30, 2008 20:08:59 GMT -6
<*>Matt Martin is seen rubbing his leg with a very discomforting look on his face as he walks over to Chris in what seems to be a hotel room of some kind. Phere is reading a book about 80’s music as he looks up and has a strange look on his face.<*>
Matthew Martin- Hey Chris, what a great show you and Gib did the other night. The fans really liked it, and everyone around us was very impressed.
Chris Phere- Nah, they were just impressed Bon Jovi was actually there.
Matthew Martin- No, I heard a few good comments about you. Can’t say much about Gib, but he tried his best. What are you reading?
Chris Phere- I figured I would read up on more music of the 80’s for maybe a future performance. I got asked back to the place and I’m trying to find a good one to do next time.
<*>Matt starts to massage his leg even harder now as Chris looks at him with a confused look on his face.<*>
Chris Phere- Hey, what’s exactly going on with you? Why do you keep grabbing at your leg?
Matthew Martin- Well, what’s that saying Jimmy Zane always says?
Chris Phere- You mean, “when in doubt, pull out”? Or maybe it is, “if she squeals like a pig, then she’s probably a pig”?
Matthew Martin- No, it is his catch phrase he always says at the end of his promos….
Chris Phere- Ohhh…you mean, “Something Wicked this way Comes”?
Matthew Martin- Yeah, but mine is *pulls pants out and looks down them* “Something Wicked this way BURNS”!
<*>There is a strange silence as Chris is still confused, then all of a sudden his eyes get huge and he stands up and starts to pace.<*>
Chris Phere- Matt, who did you leave the bar with last night?
Matthew Martin- Umm, the same girl that dedicated that song to Jack Hammer!
Chris Phere- YOU SICK FREAK!!! Jack Hammer’s daughter was in that bar last night and you left with her???
Matthew Martin- NO! I left with Vanessa!
Chris Phere- Oh my goodness, well, grab your stuff..we are going to the health clinic!
Matthew Martin- This is so embarrassing….
<*>1 HOUR AND 7 MINUTES LATER<*>
<*>Chris Phere pulls up outside of the local health clinic as he and Matt Martin both enter the building. Chris checks him in as Matt fills out some paper work. After several minutes of waiting, they are finally called to the back where the nurse meets them and explains everything to him about what they are going to do.<*>
Nurse- Sir, I need to know exactly your symptoms before we take the sample.
Matthew Martin- I have just had a lot of burning, some swelling, and some puss coming out of my penis.
Nurse- When did this happen?
Matthew Martin- A few hours after I had sex last night, strange how it works so quickly.
Nurse- And who was your sexual partner?
Matthew Martin- Her name is Vanessa, she’s got some kind of a connection with Jack Hammer of the nCw.
Nurse- Alright sir, we are going to need to take a sample from your penis right now.
Matthew Martin- Uhh, excuse me?
Chris Phere- So whip it out for her big daddy…HA! Come on man, it is really quick and you won’t even know it happened. I will step outside the door while she does this.
<*>Chris leaves Matt and steps outside the door. Matt looks around and is swabbed by the nurse, there is a very strange look on Matt’s face as he pulls up his pants quickly and the nurse calls Chris back into the room. Chris walks in as he’s got a very big smile on his face. The nurse speaks after she puts the sample safely away.<*>
Nurse- Sir, it sounds like you have Chlamydia.
<*>Chris snickers a little bit as Matt jerks his head around and looks at Chris telling him to shut up. Then he looks at the nurse and the look on his face is PRICELESS!<*>
Matthew Martin- I can’t believe that stupid bitch would do this to me!
Chris Phere- Oh, come on man, she probably doesn’t even realize she’s got it. She got desperate and slept with some male whore or something, it isn’t anything that can’t be cured.
Matthew Martin- But it is the principle of the whole thing, the bitch should have known.
Chris Phere- Well, just goes to show that Jack Hammer has a lot more to worry about than his daughter loving him again. And also tells us why he does GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME!
Matthew Martin- I guess that’s true, come on, let’s get out of here. You have a Russian Chain match to prepare for against Jack Ass!
<*>Matt and Chris both start to laugh as the scene fades.<*>