Post by Cyrus Daniels on Apr 9, 2009 12:23:32 GMT -6
Courtesy: newchampionshipwrestling.com
I am not used to this, Jason. There was a time when all Leonard expected of me was to do this once a week, to give nCw a dose of reality once a week, a spark of enlightenment if you will. But now, now this is my second column of the week, and I'm already feeling overworked.
It is a tough job being a wrestler isn't it? I realise now that I much prefer my job as a sports entertainment journalist, I haven't even stepped into a ring and I already know that I don't want to be a wrestler. I miss my six days of relative ease already, I miss just being a spectator in my comfortable little office with the water cooler and the half sprinkled doughnuts. I miss the days when my biggest concern was what to write in my column, now I have to worry not only about what I'm writing here, but also about my personal safety.
I had to check whether my health insurance was all in order, and thankfully it is, I even thought about a funeral service, how am I going to pay for it, Jason? They rip you off even on your way to the grave. I've never thought about my end before, I've never been forced to contemplate my demise, I've never had to confront my own mortality.
It certainly is an eye opening experience, isn't it Jason? The fear of the unknown scares me, all week I've been thinking about how all of this will end and my only conclusion is that it will not end well. I haven't slept well ever since I found out about this. My whole life unfolds before me in flashes, disjointed memories of pain and suffering. I wake up in cold sweats, tortured by as yet unrealised nightmares.
Help me, Jason. Help me. You're the only one who can now.
Irony sure is cruel, the tormenter becomes the tormented. I am reaping all that I have sown. And I am sorry, Jason. I am sorry. I am alone, I have always been alone. I have no one. No family to care for me. I am an only child, I have no wife, no child. No love.
I realise now how truly alone I am, my colleagues, my peers, men I considered friends. they laugh. They jeer. They tell me that this is what I deserve. They have turned their backs on me. They have abandonded me. But more than that, the most depressing thing in all of this is the one sobering realisation that my life has been wasted.
All I ever wanted Jason was a family. I wanted the whole marriage thing, I did. All I've ever wanted is to be accepted, but I've always been the outcast, I have always been the bully. The kid who would sit in the playground alone with a magnifying glass and watch all the tiny insignificant ants burn. I'd take pleasure in the power I wielded even then.
No girl wanted me, they thought I was far too brutish to be charming and so rejection after rejection forged the cold hard links of the chain that shackles me to my career. This is all I have. This is all I know. This is my wife and High Voltage is my child. The one son who will never abandon me, and I know you want to take all of this away from me, and why shouldn't you? I mean I tried to take everything from you, its only fair, its only...karma.
It is only because I am married to my job that I sought to do so well in it. It is only because I saw in you Jason, the son I never had and always wanted. I am not your father, how could I be? There will be no Star Wars moment at the end of our saga. No, I bet your father had abs you could bounce a quarter off too. I bet he had women throw themselves at him, left, right and centre just like you Jason.
Like father, like son.
First Kathy. Then Amber. Now Jade. I'm not totally ignorant to the fact that I'm not blessed with your looks, physique, or talent in the ring. I can't make Jaymie or Kelly blush at the sight of me, but all in all I'd say that I'm not in bad shape at all for a 39 year old, even if I'm not the best looking guy on the planet.
But it all makes sense now doesn't it? My loneliness consumes me so that I even addressed this situation as if it were a family dispute in my last 'promo', yes Jason, it may have been a dysfunctional family, but damn it, it was still family. My family. At least in my imagination.
Jason, I am a weasel, I'll admit that, and now I realise that a weasel can only weasel because it knows no better, but also there's only so long a weasel can weasel before it ultimately goes pop. I'm stepping into your world against my will this Saturday. I don't want to. I don't want to be popped in the mouth. I want to be saved, I want to back pedal, I want my old life back, the life where I was a successful businessman. I'm a corporate suit at heart, not a wrestler, please remember that through all the rage you feel Jason. Beat me if you must, if it appeases you, but please leave enough of my dignity intact so that I may return to my role behind the scenes. Remember, I'm just a man, that's all I'll ever be. I'm not a Superstar like you, I'll never be. I don't want to be. All I've ever wanted to be is a simple man who excels at his thankless job.
Save me Jason. Save me because nobody else will.
There is no sense of malice or ill intent behind the pride I feel for you Jason, all of what I said was true, a truth I cannot deny in my time of need. You may have been the black sheep of the family I never had son, but I'm still proud of you, I always will be. Even this Saturday as I look up at you from the canvas through bloodied eyes and see your hand raised, I will be proud of you, Jason.
I am sorry that my jealousy clouded my judgment, maybe I should have just let you be happy with Amber, instead of forcing you to be as miserable as I am, but you know what they say - misery loves company. In my mind, I was only trying to help you better yourself. I'm sorry that I tried to help you, you never asked that of me, and why would you? Nobody ever wants anything from Damien Sparks. Not when they can go to Brent, Chris, Kelly or even Leonard as you did. I'm sorry for just doing my job.
Lesson lived. Lesson learned. I'll never try to help anyone but myself anymore. I'm not expecting you to forget the trails I just put your career through, all I can ask for is your forgiveness. Please tell me I deserve that much at least.
I will never again try to encourage competition from you through reverse psychology, like I did when I said you didn't deserve your spot in that number one contender's match before Sovereign. I will never again inspire competition from you through negative reaction as I did when I hit you in the head with a chair.
Let's just shake hands and let bygones be bygones, I wish it could be that simple, but I know it never will be. You have a point to prove, you have a chair shot to get even for and you have the ladies to impress at my expense. More than that, you have a job to do. You have your sense of pride. You will do what needs to be done this Saturday. You will kick my ass all around the ring and you will probably knock me unconscious. You will do all this because you know you have a job to do, and I'd be a hypocrite if I were to criticise you for it. In the end, something will be proven. People will see something in Jason that they have never seen before.
A ruthlessness.
A determination.
A drive to get the job done at any cost.
A sense of pride over popularity.
A desire to be the best at what you do.
Like father, like son.
nCw High Voltage
April 9th, 2009
Second Trauma Edition
April 9th, 2009
Second Trauma Edition
Like Father. Like Son.
Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed within this column are strictly those of the President of the nCw Competition Committee, Damien Sparks and are not necessarily shared by New Championship Wrestling or Fate Entertainment
I am not used to this, Jason. There was a time when all Leonard expected of me was to do this once a week, to give nCw a dose of reality once a week, a spark of enlightenment if you will. But now, now this is my second column of the week, and I'm already feeling overworked.
It is a tough job being a wrestler isn't it? I realise now that I much prefer my job as a sports entertainment journalist, I haven't even stepped into a ring and I already know that I don't want to be a wrestler. I miss my six days of relative ease already, I miss just being a spectator in my comfortable little office with the water cooler and the half sprinkled doughnuts. I miss the days when my biggest concern was what to write in my column, now I have to worry not only about what I'm writing here, but also about my personal safety.
I had to check whether my health insurance was all in order, and thankfully it is, I even thought about a funeral service, how am I going to pay for it, Jason? They rip you off even on your way to the grave. I've never thought about my end before, I've never been forced to contemplate my demise, I've never had to confront my own mortality.
It certainly is an eye opening experience, isn't it Jason? The fear of the unknown scares me, all week I've been thinking about how all of this will end and my only conclusion is that it will not end well. I haven't slept well ever since I found out about this. My whole life unfolds before me in flashes, disjointed memories of pain and suffering. I wake up in cold sweats, tortured by as yet unrealised nightmares.
Help me, Jason. Help me. You're the only one who can now.
Irony sure is cruel, the tormenter becomes the tormented. I am reaping all that I have sown. And I am sorry, Jason. I am sorry. I am alone, I have always been alone. I have no one. No family to care for me. I am an only child, I have no wife, no child. No love.
I realise now how truly alone I am, my colleagues, my peers, men I considered friends. they laugh. They jeer. They tell me that this is what I deserve. They have turned their backs on me. They have abandonded me. But more than that, the most depressing thing in all of this is the one sobering realisation that my life has been wasted.
All I ever wanted Jason was a family. I wanted the whole marriage thing, I did. All I've ever wanted is to be accepted, but I've always been the outcast, I have always been the bully. The kid who would sit in the playground alone with a magnifying glass and watch all the tiny insignificant ants burn. I'd take pleasure in the power I wielded even then.
No girl wanted me, they thought I was far too brutish to be charming and so rejection after rejection forged the cold hard links of the chain that shackles me to my career. This is all I have. This is all I know. This is my wife and High Voltage is my child. The one son who will never abandon me, and I know you want to take all of this away from me, and why shouldn't you? I mean I tried to take everything from you, its only fair, its only...karma.
It is only because I am married to my job that I sought to do so well in it. It is only because I saw in you Jason, the son I never had and always wanted. I am not your father, how could I be? There will be no Star Wars moment at the end of our saga. No, I bet your father had abs you could bounce a quarter off too. I bet he had women throw themselves at him, left, right and centre just like you Jason.
Like father, like son.
First Kathy. Then Amber. Now Jade. I'm not totally ignorant to the fact that I'm not blessed with your looks, physique, or talent in the ring. I can't make Jaymie or Kelly blush at the sight of me, but all in all I'd say that I'm not in bad shape at all for a 39 year old, even if I'm not the best looking guy on the planet.
But it all makes sense now doesn't it? My loneliness consumes me so that I even addressed this situation as if it were a family dispute in my last 'promo', yes Jason, it may have been a dysfunctional family, but damn it, it was still family. My family. At least in my imagination.
Jason, I am a weasel, I'll admit that, and now I realise that a weasel can only weasel because it knows no better, but also there's only so long a weasel can weasel before it ultimately goes pop. I'm stepping into your world against my will this Saturday. I don't want to. I don't want to be popped in the mouth. I want to be saved, I want to back pedal, I want my old life back, the life where I was a successful businessman. I'm a corporate suit at heart, not a wrestler, please remember that through all the rage you feel Jason. Beat me if you must, if it appeases you, but please leave enough of my dignity intact so that I may return to my role behind the scenes. Remember, I'm just a man, that's all I'll ever be. I'm not a Superstar like you, I'll never be. I don't want to be. All I've ever wanted to be is a simple man who excels at his thankless job.
Save me Jason. Save me because nobody else will.
There is no sense of malice or ill intent behind the pride I feel for you Jason, all of what I said was true, a truth I cannot deny in my time of need. You may have been the black sheep of the family I never had son, but I'm still proud of you, I always will be. Even this Saturday as I look up at you from the canvas through bloodied eyes and see your hand raised, I will be proud of you, Jason.
I am sorry that my jealousy clouded my judgment, maybe I should have just let you be happy with Amber, instead of forcing you to be as miserable as I am, but you know what they say - misery loves company. In my mind, I was only trying to help you better yourself. I'm sorry that I tried to help you, you never asked that of me, and why would you? Nobody ever wants anything from Damien Sparks. Not when they can go to Brent, Chris, Kelly or even Leonard as you did. I'm sorry for just doing my job.
Lesson lived. Lesson learned. I'll never try to help anyone but myself anymore. I'm not expecting you to forget the trails I just put your career through, all I can ask for is your forgiveness. Please tell me I deserve that much at least.
I will never again try to encourage competition from you through reverse psychology, like I did when I said you didn't deserve your spot in that number one contender's match before Sovereign. I will never again inspire competition from you through negative reaction as I did when I hit you in the head with a chair.
Let's just shake hands and let bygones be bygones, I wish it could be that simple, but I know it never will be. You have a point to prove, you have a chair shot to get even for and you have the ladies to impress at my expense. More than that, you have a job to do. You have your sense of pride. You will do what needs to be done this Saturday. You will kick my ass all around the ring and you will probably knock me unconscious. You will do all this because you know you have a job to do, and I'd be a hypocrite if I were to criticise you for it. In the end, something will be proven. People will see something in Jason that they have never seen before.
A ruthlessness.
A determination.
A drive to get the job done at any cost.
A sense of pride over popularity.
A desire to be the best at what you do.
Like father, like son.
