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Post by Steve Awesome on Feb 14, 2008 10:48:27 GMT -6
Xavier walks away counting his money when all of a sudden he hears a familiar sound.
"THRILLER!!!!!!!!"
Suddenly the dead Steve Awesome reanimates and bites Xavier in the shoulder.
Awesome: Hmm.....tastes like Barbeque sauce. Weird.
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 10:58:13 GMT -6
*removes awesome's head (or destroys his brain, only way to kill a 80's zombie) and pins, then the ref who has been seemingly following us all day counts* 1..2..3
*Vertigo takes awesome's jetpack and flys to the moon*
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Post by Lance "The Icon" Ryan on Feb 14, 2008 11:01:11 GMT -6
*Lance drives out to area 51 in the desert and finds the "fake moon" that they used during the cold war to make people believe that Americans landed on the moon.
Vertigo - How the hell did you find me?
Lance - Quite easy, ain't no way you went to the real moon. Sorry I have to do this bro...
*Grabs the American Flag and breaks it over the back of Vertigo. Vertigo falls and Lance covers him for the 1.2.3 and runs off with the Belt.
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Post by Jimmy Zane on Feb 14, 2008 11:26:33 GMT -6
Punisher walks in with an alien buddy, who uses an outerspace shrink ray on Lance making him 1 foot tall. Punisher puts a boot on him and holds him down as the ref counts...1....2.......3......
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 11:30:53 GMT -6
*immediately smacks pun in the back of the head with another chair (i get them on clearance) and pins, the alien puts on a ref shirt and counts 1..2..3*
*Vertigo looks for a ride and sees dude love in his van calling him over, Vert jumps in and they speed off*
Vertigo: why'd you help me out?
Dude: OOWWW Cuz' Us Hardcore Brothers Gotta Stick Together!
*on the way they run over Joe wile blasting stayin' alive*
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Post by Lance "The Icon" Ryan on Feb 14, 2008 11:48:40 GMT -6
**Dude Love turns and looks at Vertigo, and Vert gets a little unsettled. Dude Love pulls over and takes off his costume revealing that he is actually Lance Ryan.**
Dude: What? You never guessed that Lance Ryan was just another face of foley?
**Lance Foley slaps on the mandible claw until Vert is choking then covers him. The passenger door opens and a referee makes the count...1...2...3!
**Lance kicks Vert out of the van and drives off.
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 12:06:18 GMT -6
son of a.. CHUCK!!
*Chuck Norris flys out from the clouds and rips Lance Foley out of the car then beats the holy s**t out of him then gently places him in front of Vertigo, Vert pins and Chuck counts 1..2..3. Vertigo and Chuck walk away from the scene*
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Post by Lance "The Icon" Ryan on Feb 14, 2008 13:23:20 GMT -6
*this is the ultimate showdown...of ultimate destiny*
and the fight raged on for a century many lives were claimed, but eventually the champion stood, the rest saw their better: Mr. Rogers in a bloodstained sweater
*Mr Rogers takes a cheesegrater to the face of Vertigo and kicks him down a flight of stairs. Lance comes from out of nowhere and he goes for the pin. Mr Rogers takes off his famous sweater and is wearing a ref shirt. he makes the count 1..2..3.
*Lance goes off to celebrate in the Neighborhood of Make Believe
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Post by Jimmy Zane on Feb 14, 2008 14:21:11 GMT -6
The Punisher jumps off the Trolley in Mr Rogers Neighborhood, kicking Lance in the head. Out of nowhere, Captain Kangaroo and Mr Peppermint spring into action, beating both Lance and Mr Rogers down.
Mr Rogers gets the upperhand on Mr Peppermint by hitting him with his seriously gay sneaker!! Mr. Peppermint's puppet Bear, Muffin, jumps on the scene, and bites Mr. Roger's ankle. ROGERS GOES DOWN!!
Captain Kangaroo calls out Mr Green Jeans, and they hit a couple of double team moves on Lance Ryan, laying him out on the street. Punisher jumps on Ryan. Mr Green jeans pulls off his shirt to expose a green and white striped refs shirt. He makes the count...1.....2......3......
Punisher grabs the belt, and walks through Mr Roger's Neighborhood with Captain Kangaroo, Mr Green Jeans, Mr Peppermint and Muffin. PIMPIN!!!
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Post by JackHammer on Feb 14, 2008 15:12:29 GMT -6
Just then a 2008 Top Kick comes flying in running over Captain Kangaroo, Mr Green Jeans, Mr Peppermint and Muffin. The Punisher turns around as the driver's side door slammes into Punisher's face. JackHammer jumps out of the truck and pins the Punisher. Ref counts 1...2..3.
JackHammer grabs the belt and jumps back into the truck, speeding away.
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Post by Jimmy Zane on Feb 14, 2008 15:22:59 GMT -6
JackHammer gets down the block when he is suddenly rammed into by a huge 18 wheeler. Inside the 18 Wheeler is.......
HR PUFFENSTUFF!!!!
HR PUFFENSTUFF gets out and begins to beat JackHammer with FLUTIE!!! They yell and scream when out of nowhere, the Banana Splits speed up with their gokarts and take turns running over JackHammer. The last one has the Punisher on board who leaps off, covering Jackhammer as HR PUFFENSTUFF dawns the ref shirt and makes the count. 1....2......3
now i'm a 5time.....5time.....5time.....5time......5time...HARDCORE CHAMPION!!
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 15:26:48 GMT -6
*and he runs right into Goku smashing the car and sending Hammer flying. Goku walks over to hammer and pins him. Vertigo throws on a ref shirt and counts 1..2..3. Goku teleports to Namek*
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Post by JackHammer on Feb 14, 2008 17:05:47 GMT -6
JackHammer kicks Punisher in the head. JackHammer then grabs Goku by the throat and nails him with the Earth Tremble. JackHammer drags Punisher over and pins both Goku and the Punisher. The ref counts 1....2..3
JackHammer grabs the belt and runs off.
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Post by Joe Everyman on Feb 14, 2008 17:18:56 GMT -6
*Joe Everyman walks out of Trent Helms out, with an odd aura around him. He then looks over at Jack Hammer and then fires a Final Flash his way, blowing him up DBZ style, so his body remains. Joe runs over and covers. 1...2...3!*
Joe Everyman: Thank you Trent!
*Joe runs off into the distance*
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 17:29:41 GMT -6
you have learned well Joe-San. But Not Well Enough. Trent Taught Me First, And I Shall' Honor Him.
KA-MEEE-HAAAAA-MEEE-HAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*shoots a kamehameha through Joe's stomach and pins, 1..2..3, then superglues the belt to my chest and runs away*
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Post by Joe Everyman on Feb 14, 2008 17:37:14 GMT -6
*Joe stands up and looks down*
Joe Everyman: f**ker!
*He then grabs a Washington Redskins jersey (I hate the Redskins, but Joe is from DC) and puts it on, covering the hole. He then grabs an M16 and shots Vertigo in the back. He runs over the covers. 1...2...3!*
Joe Everyman: Hmm...
*Runs over the Dave Hollands car and grabs a Crowbar*
Joe Everyman: And yet he told me he didn't kill Gordan.
*Joe runs over and rips off the belt and runs off with it and the crowbar*
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 17:38:59 GMT -6
*Joe turns the corner and runs right into Vertigo who's holding a butcher knife, after a few stabs Vertigo takes the belt and puts it down his pants where no one would dare reach and walks away*
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Post by Joe Everyman on Feb 14, 2008 17:44:14 GMT -6
*Joe, being god-modded, stands back up and looks around*
Joe Everyman: You know, you never pinned me!
*Joe then pays a hooker...lets say...Paris Hilton to get the belt. She does, kicks Vertigo in the nuts, cleans off the belt, and hands it back to Joe. Joe then runs off again*
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 18:11:50 GMT -6
two can play at this game! up down left right B A Start! *gets +30 lives and stabs Joe then pins him Paris counts, 1..2...3*
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Post by Joe Everyman on Feb 14, 2008 19:57:55 GMT -6
*Scotty Callaway comes running in out of nowhere with a halbard in hand, and swings down, hitting Vertigo right across the spine. He covers. 1...2...3!*
Scotty Callaway: Whoo!
*Scotty runs off, leaving Joe bleeding on the ground*
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 22:06:53 GMT -6
*gets up and woners why the **** Joe is bleeding as Kurt Cobain is re-encarnated and smashes a guitar over the head of Scotty and pins him. Vertigo sees the pin and runs his ass off to count 1..2..3. Vertigo raises Kurt's arm and they jump into a car and speed off twoard Seattle*
Vertigo: how the hell did you come back
Kurt: the power of the time machine.
Vertigo: so you never died!?
Kurt: no Courtney killed me, but you came back in 2073 and saved me sending me back to now.
Vertigo: sounds like something i'd do. alright well.. lets get the **** out.
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Post by Joe Everyman on Feb 14, 2008 22:20:40 GMT -6
*Joe and Scotty try to run after the car, but are too slow. Suddenly, a huge ****in' explosion engulfs the car. We hear a ref count. 1...2...3. Joe and Scotty both look confused. Then, out of the smoke, John Cena runs past them with the Hardcore title in hand*
Joe Everyman: Dear god...
Scotty Callaway: Well, we're ****ed!
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 22:38:35 GMT -6
*Kurt and Vertigo are still sitting in the leather seat looking confused as hell. Vertigo is still holding the steering wheel and Kurt is smokeing a cigarette. they look at eachother*
Vertigo: what the **** just happened?
Kurt: some wigger stole my belt!
Vertigo: just a second..
*Vertigo puts his hand on Kurt's shouldre and pulls out a chaos emerald*
Vertigo: CHAOS CONTROL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*they disappear and re-appear infront of Cena. Vertigo slaps Cena to the ground and Kurt puts out the cigarette is his eye and pins him. Vert counts 1..2..3.. Vertigo and Kurt jack Cena's car and speed off running over Joe and Scotty continueing on their way to Seattle*
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Post by Xavier Williams on Feb 14, 2008 23:10:37 GMT -6
*uses Devil Bringer to tear Vert, Kurt,, Scotty, Joe, John, ands some asian a new one, then liberates their heads from their bodies, and steals their wallets*
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 14, 2008 23:31:36 GMT -6
*god mods Vertigo and Kurt back to life and they keep driveing*
Kurt: did you smell mexican for a second?
Vertigo: yeah, weird..
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Post by JackHammer on Feb 15, 2008 0:12:06 GMT -6
JackHammer crashes a cement truck into the vechile. JackHammer slides through the windshield. He pulls Kurt and Vertigo out stomping the **** out of them. He pins them both. Ref counts 1...2..3
Winner of the hardcore title for the 3rd time. JackHammer
JackHammer grabs the belt and runs off.
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Post by Markus E. Reeves on Feb 15, 2008 0:12:59 GMT -6
*Mark Evil appears in the backseat of the car and bashes VD and Kurt's heads together knocking them out*
Mark Evil: Life sucks VD
*Mark jumps out of the car as it crashes into a wall and explodes. Mark pulls a ref out of the car and Mark covers VD and Kurt's mangled bodies
1...2....3!
Here is your winner and new nCw Hardcore Champion and the owner of VD and Kurt's souls. Mark Evil!
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Post by JackHammer on Feb 15, 2008 0:38:35 GMT -6
Too bad already beat them Mark *laughs then shoves 500 lb woman onto Mark Evil*
JackHammer grabs the belt and jumps onto a motorcycle and takes off.
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Post by Markus E. Reeves on Feb 15, 2008 0:50:25 GMT -6
*shoots an RPG at Jackhammer and pins and him*
1...2...3!
Mark Evil wins again
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Post by Bannedingo on Feb 15, 2008 2:20:57 GMT -6
*revives kurt and looks around*
Kurt: Seattle is 10 miles from here..
Vertigo: lets go then.
*Kurt and Vert walk down the road twoard Seattle*
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