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Post by Shane Hunt on Dec 4, 2009 20:24:11 GMT -6
Read my RPs and tell me the varying ways I suck lol. Don't comment on my sexuality, as we all know what I like...
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Post by adm on Dec 5, 2009 20:50:14 GMT -6
Your firs roleplay: Most could have gone in the Developmental board, the whole call about getting a match, setting up character, could have been done there.
However, the 1st and 2nd rps, after that...pretty good, could shorten a few lines here, a few lines there. I liked that you used Wikipedia and other sources to "look up" opponents. Being a new guy in a fed, you never SEE people do the research, just assume. This makes it a bit funny, yet natural. I mean...we wiki everything, why not our opponents?
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Post by Maniac on Dec 6, 2009 17:53:36 GMT -6
The only advice I'd have is some of the descriptions ran on a little long, a little too descriptive. He hands her money and she hands him change is all we really need to know. Other than that, love ya.
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Post by Shane Hunt on Dec 6, 2009 18:04:37 GMT -6
Cheers for the feedback. I tend to get really into describing stuff, and do overdo it at times. Wiki is something I use every single time, so I decided my wrestler could use it too.
I'm working on making what my wrestler says flow better, because sometimes I feel it reads a bit robotic. When I read through my RPs now, I read the spoken parts out loud to hear what they sound like when I say them, and adjust accordingly.
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