|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Jun 10, 2009 20:12:08 GMT -6
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Jun 10, 2009 20:18:59 GMT -6
Also, I wasn't sure on how free the usage of staff members were, so I took the chance.
|
|
|
Post by adm on Jun 10, 2009 20:20:07 GMT -6
It was interesting, a good bit of CD to introduce the character and just a little about the match and how you know nobody here.
My only real criticism is that you think of the default gray bg for the boards when coloring...the pink was kinda hard on my eyes. It's just one of those things to double-check before posting.
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Jun 13, 2009 4:33:25 GMT -6
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Jun 18, 2009 17:22:51 GMT -6
|
|
|
Post by Keybo Shabaz on Jun 18, 2009 17:54:20 GMT -6
I honestly love where this character is headed. Sort of an apathetic loner who has been out of touch for a while. The character development is progressing nicely, not all at once, but not leaving me with tons of questions.
Only criticism I have is that there's really no semblance of a wrestling promo. CD is fantastic, but that's only half. It doesn't have to be super long, a quick jib or two, but something.. please? pretty please?
|
|
|
Post by adm on Jun 18, 2009 18:31:10 GMT -6
I agree, it's the same story with Shaddix's return promo...all CD no "meat" It's best to do a mix of CD and promo. But overall, great CD and you seem to have a good style that fits the char.
Just do a little match-based Promo...that's all we ask, sir. A paragraph or two per rp should be more than enough in most situations without an active feud.
|
|
|
Post by Chris Brock on Jun 18, 2009 19:26:03 GMT -6
I like your style of Rp that you do, it's very flowing and very dramatic. I do agree that you need to speak a little more about your opponents. One of the best Promo styles that I enjoy writting are during a drive to the next city. they give you time really get into whatever it is that you want.
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Jun 18, 2009 19:27:08 GMT -6
Thanks guys. Appreciate the feedback. Yeah, I figured I'd get called out on that. I slowly start gearing my roleplays towards my matches when I begin to get a better grasp on things. I'll try to focus a bit more on that for my second roleplay this week. Thanks.
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Jun 26, 2009 23:56:59 GMT -6
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Jul 11, 2009 2:13:16 GMT -6
|
|
|
Post by Keybo Shabaz on Jul 11, 2009 5:08:57 GMT -6
You continue to amaze and impress. You've found the line where you can have multiple part rps without a certain piece running on too long.
Nice work.
|
|
|
Post by adm on Jul 11, 2009 9:28:24 GMT -6
I saw some grammar errors, nothing too big or massive, one here, one there...usually just a word missing like "A" or "Be" or "the", stuff you sometimes don't realize when you type and if you miss it in the re-reading/coding it just stays there.
It was a pretty good rp, th ough I slightly disagree with Mark/Keybo, the 1st and 2nd parts could have been shortened for efficiency just a tad, a few sentences here and there and it may have worked just a little better.
the good news is you're still one of the best new guys here...and one of the few of the original crop that are still here. Good Job...keep improving and you'll see good things in the future.
|
|
|
Post by Spike Kane on Jul 24, 2009 4:48:45 GMT -6
Your latest roleplay I found very interesting. It's hard nowadays to capture me for an entire roleplay, I've read far too many in my time and sometimes things just tend to repeat. However with your character there is something fresh about him, and his relationship with his sister reminds me a little of my own character (pre- the Brad Kane storyline)
Very solid roleplay Cam, I think you cane xpect big things around here if you keep it up.
|
|
|
Post by Cliff Clinton on Jul 24, 2009 12:45:15 GMT -6
WOOO!
Cam please don't leave me again. I need those corvis rps too LIVE!!!!!!
|
|
Daredevil
Rookie
The Death Defying Daredevil!!!
Posts: 71
|
Post by Daredevil on Jul 30, 2009 11:47:29 GMT -6
I must say man that RP was wicked and was just glued to it I'm hoping to get another up tonight if I can but tomorrow at the latest good work and good luck...not that you need it.
|
|
Daredevil
Rookie
The Death Defying Daredevil!!!
Posts: 71
|
Post by Daredevil on Aug 8, 2009 13:59:50 GMT -6
That was a great RP man.....look forward to reading more of ya RP's as like them alot.
|
|
|
Post by Cameron Corvis on Sept 11, 2009 4:02:03 GMT -6
I don't ask for it much. But feedback please on my last rp. Thanks!
|
|