Post by Kelly Fox on Nov 28, 2007 18:47:11 GMT -6
That's right fans it's Wednesday and that means it's time for another rousing addition of "THE FOX REPORT" That's right the only "real" place to get all your news, highlights, and bold predictions. With my incredible writing talent, I'll keep you on the edge of your seat drolling, and it won't be because you just suffered a major stroke, unlike what happens after watching "News Worthy".
Recap
This week lets start out by going over what happened at Collision last week. Firstly, it was a complete sham me and Adam losing that match, we were boned and screwed, that's right both. My dad comes out and starts throwing his weight around and cost us that match with dirty tactics. Of course that no talent trailer monkey Richard Marciano had to take full advantage. How about this TXO, next time be a man and win your battles fair and esquare.. k? Thanks.
Also we got to see Davey Ortega force himself upon Christian Kane, practically taking his virginity, with the brutal assault he took. Kane was on the run early in that match screaming for his mommy. Good stuff, as always.
The biggest story that came from collision however is that fact that Seth Drabble comes to the ring without a partner, apparently ready to face the World Champion and X-Division champion in a handicap match. When things started looking bleak it is Trent Helms that came to his rescue, in an amazing match that followed Drabble was able to roll up the Spike Kane and pick up the biggest win of his career. Drabble looked to be on the road to super stardom with that victory however something serious happened immediately after the match...
With the steroid scandal that has been rocking the foundation of the MLB over recent years the nCw upon creation immediately implemented a zero tolerance policy against performance enhancing drugs. In this policy it states that wrestlers susceptible to random drug tests at any time. Seth Drabble was administered a drug test immediately following the victory over Spike Kane and tested positive for anabolic steroids. Therefore in a few short hours he goes from a potential main event spot in the company to the unemployment line. It's a sad day in nCw when somebody with such a bright future throws it all away, however he broke the rules and knew what he was doing therefore the nCw has no remorse in cutting him.
Finally, Lance Ryan last week finally wised up and dumped the rest of those NWS losers and kept the cream of the crop, Joe Everyman. Stole a member away from the Empire, and added the young up and comer Veritgo Dirtmurder. The smartest move Ryan ever did was to distance himself from those NWS guys I must say, espcially Sack of S*** Phillip Burns.
Well that's all I have to say about last week, so how about we move on to the match previews. Both shows look to be great this week and I'm very excited.
Match Previews
Suspense:
Blitz vs. Tankelad
A guy with a stupid name against a guy with a name nobody can pronounce. Wow this should be entertaining that is until Tankelad gets hungry and decides to try and eat Blitz's left arm.
Winner: Tankelad, because it's hard to win a fight when somebody is eating your arm.
Vincent Romero vs. War Train
Romero is a freak of nature. I've seen him wrestle in Colo and he can flat out tear through somebody. War Train is also very talented and could easily pull off this win if Romero isn't careful.
Winner: War Train could pull it off but I'm going with Romero because he's just a tad bit more of a freak.
Jason Norton vs. Syringe
Who cares.
Winner: I don't know who will win, but I can tell you who will lose... the fans. This is going to be one sleeper of a match.
Boppo and Karnage{AoV} vs. Jake Kane and Big L {Double Trouble}
The AoV versus Double Trouble. DT is young and inexperienced so I'm going to have to say the AoV has the upper hand.
Winner: The AoV.... book it.
Collision:
Sexy Jason vs. Chris Cruise
Jason and Cruise had some harsh words for each other on Suspense last week, and now they will come face to face.
Winner: Sexy Jason, because Cruise is too blinded with rage to keep his head on straight for the match.
The Ace vs. Richard Marciano
The Ace takes on "The Xtreme-cheater One" Richard Marciano. The Ace likes to hit people with sledge hammers and Marciano just plain likes to play cheap, who will win this battle of the cheaters?
Winner: The Ace, because he's a better dirty player then TXO.
Punisher vs. Phillip Burns vs. Christian Kane Vs Steve Awesome
A four way match featuring two boring twats and to nCw Superstars.... should be very interesting. The question here is will Punisher and Awesome's charisma be able to carry Burns and C. Kane?
Winner: I'll have to go with Punisher because I know the most about him and his talents. Awesome looks great, but he isn't a Punisher not just yet.
Spike Kane, Reckless Jack, and Davey Ortega vs. Vertigo Dirtmurder, Lance Ryan, and Joe Everyman w/ John Anthony at ringside
The backstabbing douche bags are teaming with "The Dude" against Lance Ryan's new stable Insurrection Inc. So that makes the World Champion, X-Division Champion, and Xtreme Champion taking on the former world champion, former Xtreme champion and some guy. Should be a great match.
Winner: It's hard to pick against all that shiny gold.
Jack Manson and Ricky Johnson vs. The Brothers Holland
Wow, this is going to be an epic match, could be the match of the year right here. 3 former/current National champions in the ring at one time, with the tag team gold on the line! Interesting note this is the first time Milo and Ricky Johnson will be in the ring together since Ricky walked away with Milo's National title.
Winner: Hard decision here. I'm going to say this match will somehow end in a draw, therefore the Holland's retain their gold straps.
Weekly Awards
Wrestler of the Week: Jack Manson
Promoer of the Week: Davey Ortega
Match of the Week: Davey Ortega vs. Christian Kane
Quote of the Week: "Listen I'm not doing this because I like you because quiet frankly I couldn't give to s**** if you was in jail getting the good old treatment in the showers." - Christian Kane
New Weekly Award
That's right fans, from now on there will be a new weekly award. It should add some extra spice because nobody is going to want it. I call it the......
Drabble award for ineptitude or the Dafi (pronounced daffy). Given to the most boneheaded wrestler of the week.
So here it is, this weeks DAFI award winner is
Weekly DAFI: Seth Drabble
Big suprise huh? I'm such a master of suspense.
In Closing
Thanks for reading another addition of the spectacular Fox Report everybody. This week is going to be full of action and I can't wait, make sure to tune in and check it out. This is Kelly Fox saying peace, and News Worthy sucks.