Atreyu
Rookie
We'll wear our scars, like medals of hope
Posts: 15
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Post by Atreyu on Nov 17, 2009 15:56:04 GMT -6
Hey I know some of you still think I'm some crazy emo kid come to complain and moan but you couldn't be further from the truth Anywho, just posted my first roleplay for Mind Games. Can a fella get any feedback from his peers?
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Post by The Reverend James Bradley on Nov 17, 2009 16:37:01 GMT -6
i liked it, the speech flowed really well and i could really picture him saying it. the mood was good and i liked the talk of a "new era" that was cool i didn't understand the ending really, but i'm new so that's not surprising lol. looking at the RPs that Gabriel but up i think you could do with a little bit more length personally, but its a very solid foundation.
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Atreyu
Rookie
We'll wear our scars, like medals of hope
Posts: 15
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Post by Atreyu on Jan 7, 2010 6:21:35 GMT -6
New rp posted for Collision.
Can I get a little love!?
I'd really like some feedback on the character as well as the rp, the general character and the angle he's got working if you guys feel like it?
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Atreyu
Rookie
We'll wear our scars, like medals of hope
Posts: 15
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Post by Atreyu on Jan 15, 2010 8:25:58 GMT -6
Second Collision rp up, hope you guys enjoy.
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Atreyu
Rookie
We'll wear our scars, like medals of hope
Posts: 15
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Post by Atreyu on Jan 26, 2010 9:06:34 GMT -6
So lonely....
Will breakdance for feedback!
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Lord Dominicus
Junior Member
Resident Loser
More Evil than Rob Diamond Could Ever Hope to Be
Posts: 373
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Post by Lord Dominicus on Jan 26, 2010 10:36:15 GMT -6
Nelly's not generally one for swearing. But otherwise it's pretty good. You're starting to get that Spike/BK style going where things snowball in a fued until its ultra personal. But stylistically I'm mostly satisfied.
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Post by Shane Hunt on Jan 26, 2010 12:26:53 GMT -6
I liked it. I liked how you split the scenes up with what I imagine is Atreyu's thoughts which are running through his head.
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Atreyu
Rookie
We'll wear our scars, like medals of hope
Posts: 15
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Post by Atreyu on Jan 27, 2010 8:19:46 GMT -6
Sorry bout that Al, will make sure to never do it again.
thanks for the feedback guys.
Second rp is up if anyone wants to critique
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Post by Cliff Clinton on Jan 27, 2010 9:40:14 GMT -6
Nice rps man. I cant believe what Ragnal did! I would always mess with Brad and talk about having Steve get freaky with Freya and just when I think I got the opportunity...Atreyu moves in lol.
Anyways...you the man and you know it.
Good work bro.
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Lord Dominicus
Junior Member
Resident Loser
More Evil than Rob Diamond Could Ever Hope to Be
Posts: 373
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Post by Lord Dominicus on Feb 10, 2010 11:52:53 GMT -6
That RP kicked so much ass I don't even know where to start. I loved that Spike doesn't really know what's going on, I love that Nelly got to have one of his classic "break into the scene" routines that harkens back to his interview days, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE that you carried on the tradition that Nelly can't pronounce Atreyu's name. Pretty much perfect man.
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Post by disdonn on Mar 5, 2010 19:34:50 GMT -6
your rp was very angry. VERY VERY angry. I have a feeling we will be fighting one another eventually cuz of this You and Nelly are very...opposites.
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Post by chris on Mar 5, 2010 20:12:47 GMT -6
I'm not too familiar with the judging system here so don't take anything I say the wrong way. It's just that I'm used to a scoring system that gives a set number of points for each individual category in a RP. Dialogue, Description, Entertainment, Relevency ect. A lot that I thought didn't make sense myself but they were the rules and everyone tried to put as much into them as they could to get higher scores. I personally always thought a judge should rate a RP based on their honest opinion instead of scores. But that's me.
Now to be perfectly honest, this is MY kind of roleplay but if it came down to those categories, I'd have a couple flaws about it. What I loved was that Atreyu just goes balls out and holds nothing back lol. I also agree with Juliette Lee here too, there was a lot of anger in this roleplay. Now I really enjoyed reading Atreyu going out and trashing everyone but the only thing I disliked was that you left some things out that would've made it look almost like a real life promo. What I mean by that was there wasn't really any description, I don't know where it's taking place and there's no scenary or anything like that so I didn't really know how to invision it in my mind as I was reading it. I'm just used to those ones that have a lot of detail behind them. Besides that, it was a pretty well done promo and the trash talking was sweet. You did a great job in that department. I hope I don't get on this dude's bad side haha.
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Atreyu
Rookie
We'll wear our scars, like medals of hope
Posts: 15
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Post by Atreyu on Mar 8, 2010 3:49:38 GMT -6
Holy crap, didn't expect any feedback thanks alot guys.
And Epic, thank you for you're honest opinion!
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Atreyu
Rookie
We'll wear our scars, like medals of hope
Posts: 15
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Post by Atreyu on Mar 7, 2012 12:10:54 GMT -6
Wow reading over that makes me think i might actually be able to pull off this Atreyu dude again Any feedback for my latest roleplay? Probably the longest Atreyu rp, a lot of depth and **** to talk abut. Thanks.
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