Post by "Bad Luck" Chuck on Nov 19, 2009 4:55:47 GMT -6
How Chuck Got His Luck. Pt 1.
As told by Chuck Luckerson.
It was a day like any other day and I was just walking around minding my own business yet always fearful of my life.
The scene shows Chuck walking down a sidewalk. Suddenly a flaming arrow whizzes passed his head and the look on his face changes from comfortable to slightly nervous. He takes a couple more steps and suddenly a bolt of lightning strikes the ground two feet from where he was. He looks visibly frightened as he starts to run through the park.
I have no idea why this happens to me. But it’s sort of like a metaphor you know? Whatever life throws at you, you just gotta keep going. No matter what it is.
Suddenly a large Gorilla juggling chainsaws leaps out from the bushes. Chuck screams bloody murder and takes off running the other way.
Okay….that was just ridiculous.
Chuck sprints through the park, narrowly missing the Buick. Leaping over open sewer. Limboing underneath the plate of glass being carried by two workers, and barely manages to not get trampled by the parade of Marlon Brando look-a-likes.
Pretty intense right? But when you live life like I do…you learn how to avoid things like this. Whatever happens to me, I can dodge.
Chuck stops to catch his breath and wipe the beads of sweat forming on his brow. He looks back at the obstacles he overcame and a sense of pride comes over him. That is, until he’s nailed in the head by a flying baby and collapses onto the pavement.
Honestly….who throws a baby?
The scene fades and re-opens and Chuck finds himself waking up inside a strange cave he's never been in.
And I've been in a lot of caves.
Chuck gets to his feet and dusts himself off and looks around. There standing in front of him was a midget in a leprechaun suit.
"Holy Crap it's Hornswoggle!"
The midget rolls his eyes.
"Why do people instantly reach for that comparison? My name is freaking Roy!"
Hmmmm.....dude dresses nice for living in a cave.
"Where am I?"
Roy the Midget smiles.
"Your in my cave. And today is your lucky day!"
To be continued……
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The scene opens up on the outskirts of a house party. Every window has light coming from it and the music is so loud you can hear Jay-Z rapping from three blocks away. This is the party of the year and if your not invited….well you suck. The place is packed and yet more and more people file in. A car pulls up and three leggy females step out of it, giggling and looking in there pocket mirrors to make sure they are looking good.
Girl 1: Oh my Gaw…he is so sexy! I hope he likes my lipstick.
Girl 2: Like totally...if I see him I might rape him!
Girl 3: Oh my Gaw! Your such a slut! But like..Id totally rape him too. He he.
The girls giggle and walk into the house, camera right behind them, checking out there asses before they get lost in the sea of people drinking and having fun. The camera somehow pushes his way through the mass of drunkards and eventually finds who he was looking for. The host of the party, the man of the hour. None other than…….”Bad Luck” Chuck?”
“Yeah…I’d be surprised too.”
Chuck smiles into the camera as a bunch of chicks caress his somehow ripped chest. A couple drunk guys walk up and tell him how totally kick ass his party is and ask him if he wants to do a beer bong. Chuck respectfully declines and they walk away.
“I know what your thinking…..just a few weeks ago I was Chuck the loser. Nobody liked me, I couldn’t afford to eat and I couldn’t win a match to save my life. And now I’m sitting here throwing the party of the century, I’m winning matches and I get a shot at possibly facing the Xtreme Champion. This just does not make SENSE!”
He shakes his head, a small laugh shoots out of his mouth.
“I seriously can’t believe it. I get a shot at a shot at the Xtreme Championship. Against a clown and two guys in masks. Were going to be beating the crap out of each other for that golden opportunity. Mr. Mysterio is a monstrosity. He says wrong place wrong time but seriously when is there ever a right place right time to face the guy? He gets a hard on for hurting people, if I would have faced him two weeks ago he probably would have crushed me. He would have smeared me into the mat and that would be that. But not this time. Not now. This week is Chucks time to shine. See Mysterio is big, dumb and slow. His pain threshold may be high and he may do a lot of damage but I fully intend on running circles around the big lug. But lucky for me, I don’t even have to pin him to win the match. I just have to avoid him and focus on the other two guys in the match.
“Freakke The Clown and Blackheart. Lucky for me, these guys hate each other. They wanna destroy each other due to some crazy incident that happened to them back in the day. Freakke is quick and Blackheart is strong but I’m Chuck Luckerson. I have lady luck on my side now boys, and that’s bad news for you three. See your all focused on killing one another, while I’m just focused on winning the match. And I will win it, because my luck has finally changed…..
Chuck flips his mullet out of his face.
“….and yours has just run out.”
Suddenly a mysterious fog starts to float into the room. A few of the party guests start to cough before Chuck finally notices what’s happening. He looks down at the fog forming at his feet and he sighs.
“Dang it! I thought I said Mysterios fog wasn’t invited to my party!”
Chuck grabs a vacuum and mutters under his breath as the scene fades.
As told by Chuck Luckerson.
It was a day like any other day and I was just walking around minding my own business yet always fearful of my life.
The scene shows Chuck walking down a sidewalk. Suddenly a flaming arrow whizzes passed his head and the look on his face changes from comfortable to slightly nervous. He takes a couple more steps and suddenly a bolt of lightning strikes the ground two feet from where he was. He looks visibly frightened as he starts to run through the park.
I have no idea why this happens to me. But it’s sort of like a metaphor you know? Whatever life throws at you, you just gotta keep going. No matter what it is.
Suddenly a large Gorilla juggling chainsaws leaps out from the bushes. Chuck screams bloody murder and takes off running the other way.
Okay….that was just ridiculous.
Chuck sprints through the park, narrowly missing the Buick. Leaping over open sewer. Limboing underneath the plate of glass being carried by two workers, and barely manages to not get trampled by the parade of Marlon Brando look-a-likes.
Pretty intense right? But when you live life like I do…you learn how to avoid things like this. Whatever happens to me, I can dodge.
Chuck stops to catch his breath and wipe the beads of sweat forming on his brow. He looks back at the obstacles he overcame and a sense of pride comes over him. That is, until he’s nailed in the head by a flying baby and collapses onto the pavement.
Honestly….who throws a baby?
The scene fades and re-opens and Chuck finds himself waking up inside a strange cave he's never been in.
And I've been in a lot of caves.
Chuck gets to his feet and dusts himself off and looks around. There standing in front of him was a midget in a leprechaun suit.
"Holy Crap it's Hornswoggle!"
The midget rolls his eyes.
"Why do people instantly reach for that comparison? My name is freaking Roy!"
Hmmmm.....dude dresses nice for living in a cave.
"Where am I?"
Roy the Midget smiles.
"Your in my cave. And today is your lucky day!"
To be continued……
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The scene opens up on the outskirts of a house party. Every window has light coming from it and the music is so loud you can hear Jay-Z rapping from three blocks away. This is the party of the year and if your not invited….well you suck. The place is packed and yet more and more people file in. A car pulls up and three leggy females step out of it, giggling and looking in there pocket mirrors to make sure they are looking good.
Girl 1: Oh my Gaw…he is so sexy! I hope he likes my lipstick.
Girl 2: Like totally...if I see him I might rape him!
Girl 3: Oh my Gaw! Your such a slut! But like..Id totally rape him too. He he.
The girls giggle and walk into the house, camera right behind them, checking out there asses before they get lost in the sea of people drinking and having fun. The camera somehow pushes his way through the mass of drunkards and eventually finds who he was looking for. The host of the party, the man of the hour. None other than…….”Bad Luck” Chuck?”
“Yeah…I’d be surprised too.”
Chuck smiles into the camera as a bunch of chicks caress his somehow ripped chest. A couple drunk guys walk up and tell him how totally kick ass his party is and ask him if he wants to do a beer bong. Chuck respectfully declines and they walk away.
“I know what your thinking…..just a few weeks ago I was Chuck the loser. Nobody liked me, I couldn’t afford to eat and I couldn’t win a match to save my life. And now I’m sitting here throwing the party of the century, I’m winning matches and I get a shot at possibly facing the Xtreme Champion. This just does not make SENSE!”
He shakes his head, a small laugh shoots out of his mouth.
“I seriously can’t believe it. I get a shot at a shot at the Xtreme Championship. Against a clown and two guys in masks. Were going to be beating the crap out of each other for that golden opportunity. Mr. Mysterio is a monstrosity. He says wrong place wrong time but seriously when is there ever a right place right time to face the guy? He gets a hard on for hurting people, if I would have faced him two weeks ago he probably would have crushed me. He would have smeared me into the mat and that would be that. But not this time. Not now. This week is Chucks time to shine. See Mysterio is big, dumb and slow. His pain threshold may be high and he may do a lot of damage but I fully intend on running circles around the big lug. But lucky for me, I don’t even have to pin him to win the match. I just have to avoid him and focus on the other two guys in the match.
“Freakke The Clown and Blackheart. Lucky for me, these guys hate each other. They wanna destroy each other due to some crazy incident that happened to them back in the day. Freakke is quick and Blackheart is strong but I’m Chuck Luckerson. I have lady luck on my side now boys, and that’s bad news for you three. See your all focused on killing one another, while I’m just focused on winning the match. And I will win it, because my luck has finally changed…..
Chuck flips his mullet out of his face.
“….and yours has just run out.”
Suddenly a mysterious fog starts to float into the room. A few of the party guests start to cough before Chuck finally notices what’s happening. He looks down at the fog forming at his feet and he sighs.
“Dang it! I thought I said Mysterios fog wasn’t invited to my party!”
Chuck grabs a vacuum and mutters under his breath as the scene fades.
