Post by Recklessly Happy on Feb 8, 2010 18:40:08 GMT -6
( We slowly fade in on a darkened room. There is a glare coming from off in the right hand corner. We make our way over there to see the glow of a computer screen. Muffled voices and what sounds like clashing swords and fire can be heard as we get closer. )
Load up on hp and magic, we're going to need it.
( The camera looks down on a scruffy looking Mr. Happy, seated in front of Nelly Angel's computer surrounded by small piles of doritos, soda cans and dozens of wrappers. There is also what looks like a jar of pee next to the chair. )
Happy: NO BILLY! Don't run right at the dragon. Crap guys, we're gotta bail Billy out we're going to need his magic force fields to defeat the mage.
( WTF? Whatever. Happy's eyes are locked on the screen as Randy Angel walks up behind him. )
Randy: Happy.... Happy?.... DUDE!
( Nothing. )
Randy: THE CAMERA IS HERE!!!!!
( Happy jumps a little because Randy said it in bold type this time. )
Happy: Uh huh....
Randy: You've got to cut a promo.
Happy: Uh huh... just leave it by the jar....
( Randy looks down. )
Randy: Is that lemonade?
Happy:.... Uh huh.....
( He shrugs and picks up the jar. )
Randy: Dude, you've seriously got to stop playing WoW and cut this promo, you've got a match this week.
( Happy just keeps clicking away. Randy shakes his head and walks off camera with the jar. Like 30 seconds go by and he comes back in with a sawed off double barrel shot gun straight from Mr. Happy's "Army of Darkness" collection. )
Randy: I'd cover your ears.
BANG!
( Randy totally blew away the monitor. Happy shots awake and flies to his feet, the chair falling over. )
Happy: WHAT THE HECK!?
Randy: Dude, you have a match.
Happy: Huh?
Randy: A match, you have one, this Friday.
Happy: Silly, nCw doesn't have a friday show, unless... Are we in XHF again?
( Sigh. )
Randy: Have you really been playing that game this long? nCw started up a Friday show called Suspense and your on it. Your fighting some new kid named Jason Evans, looks pretty impressive too.
Happy: Really?
Randy: Yeah, so cut this here promo so we can go torment Nelly.
Happy: Allright.... Uhhhh.... What do I say?
Randy: What do you usually say?
Happy: Wanna smurf?
( Randy pimp smacks Happy. )
Randy: WRONG!
Happy: That really hurt.
Randy: Yeah well, Jason told me to give that to you.
Happy: He did?
Randy: Yup, and he also said your mother is a dirty whore who likes to sleep with goats.
Happy: How did he know?
Randy:... He also said your mother is sleeping with... ROB DIAMOND!
( Mr. Happy knocks Randy Angel out with a right hand. )
Happy: I'LL KILL YOU JASON EVANS!!! MY MOMMY HAS WAY MORE CLASS THAN THAT!!!! NO ONE SPREADS DIRTY RUMORS ABOUT BERTHA ANGELA HAPPY!!!! YOU GO THAT!!! YOUR DEAD!!!! DEAD!!!!! BOLD FRIGGIN TYPE!!!!!! BOLD!!!!!!! TYPE!!!!!!!!
( Randy climbs back up using the table, holding his jaw. )
Randy: Yeouch.... Lets go bug Nelly.
Happy: Sweet.
( Randy picks up the jar again and takes a big swig, swishes it around and suddenly his eyes light up. )
Happy: Hey Randy, you see my jar of pee?
( Fade to Black. )
Load up on hp and magic, we're going to need it.
( The camera looks down on a scruffy looking Mr. Happy, seated in front of Nelly Angel's computer surrounded by small piles of doritos, soda cans and dozens of wrappers. There is also what looks like a jar of pee next to the chair. )
Happy: NO BILLY! Don't run right at the dragon. Crap guys, we're gotta bail Billy out we're going to need his magic force fields to defeat the mage.
( WTF? Whatever. Happy's eyes are locked on the screen as Randy Angel walks up behind him. )
Randy: Happy.... Happy?.... DUDE!
( Nothing. )
Randy: THE CAMERA IS HERE!!!!!
( Happy jumps a little because Randy said it in bold type this time. )
Happy: Uh huh....
Randy: You've got to cut a promo.
Happy: Uh huh... just leave it by the jar....
( Randy looks down. )
Randy: Is that lemonade?
Happy:.... Uh huh.....
( He shrugs and picks up the jar. )
Randy: Dude, you've seriously got to stop playing WoW and cut this promo, you've got a match this week.
( Happy just keeps clicking away. Randy shakes his head and walks off camera with the jar. Like 30 seconds go by and he comes back in with a sawed off double barrel shot gun straight from Mr. Happy's "Army of Darkness" collection. )
Randy: I'd cover your ears.
BANG!
( Randy totally blew away the monitor. Happy shots awake and flies to his feet, the chair falling over. )
Happy: WHAT THE HECK!?
Randy: Dude, you have a match.
Happy: Huh?
Randy: A match, you have one, this Friday.
Happy: Silly, nCw doesn't have a friday show, unless... Are we in XHF again?
( Sigh. )
Randy: Have you really been playing that game this long? nCw started up a Friday show called Suspense and your on it. Your fighting some new kid named Jason Evans, looks pretty impressive too.
Happy: Really?
Randy: Yeah, so cut this here promo so we can go torment Nelly.
Happy: Allright.... Uhhhh.... What do I say?
Randy: What do you usually say?
Happy: Wanna smurf?
( Randy pimp smacks Happy. )
Randy: WRONG!
Happy: That really hurt.
Randy: Yeah well, Jason told me to give that to you.
Happy: He did?
Randy: Yup, and he also said your mother is a dirty whore who likes to sleep with goats.
Happy: How did he know?
Randy:... He also said your mother is sleeping with... ROB DIAMOND!
( Mr. Happy knocks Randy Angel out with a right hand. )
Happy: I'LL KILL YOU JASON EVANS!!! MY MOMMY HAS WAY MORE CLASS THAN THAT!!!! NO ONE SPREADS DIRTY RUMORS ABOUT BERTHA ANGELA HAPPY!!!! YOU GO THAT!!! YOUR DEAD!!!! DEAD!!!!! BOLD FRIGGIN TYPE!!!!!! BOLD!!!!!!! TYPE!!!!!!!!
( Randy climbs back up using the table, holding his jaw. )
Randy: Yeouch.... Lets go bug Nelly.
Happy: Sweet.
( Randy picks up the jar again and takes a big swig, swishes it around and suddenly his eyes light up. )
Happy: Hey Randy, you see my jar of pee?
( Fade to Black. )