Post by Gib on Sept 3, 2010 21:59:16 GMT -6
(Scene opens to Serendipity, the famous dessert spot in New York City. When the camera travels inside, you see two unlikely people, Adam Knite, looking very nice wearing a polo shirt and a pair of khaki pants and his old buddy Gib who wears pants that are too tight, a brown leather vest with nothing under it and only a shiny sheriff’s badge adoring it and a cowboy hat. His massive body fills the chair that he sits in, you can tell that he has been hitting the weights taking his new job seriously)
Adam: Dude, why did you bring me here?
Gib: I ordered us two of those thousand dollar sundaes
Adam: A thousand dollar ice cream sundae? Where did you get the money for that? I know old man Fox isn’t paying you that much.
Gib: It is the fine money dude, I kick fine people, the office docks their check and gives me the money, I spend the money. It is like the directions on the shampoo bottle dude, wash, rinse and repeat.
Adam: Only you. What is this ice cream all about?
Gib: I don’t know, but for a thousand bucks they better bring it out in a ****ing garbage can!
(almost on cue about four people emerge with the sundaes. The sundaes are not brought to them in a garbage can but instead in a crystal glass, the ice cream is gold and a golden sugar flower adorns the top, they present the sundaes to them and Adam looks impressed, Gib however looks confused)
Gib: Where is the rest?
Waiter: This is it, the golden sundae, twenty four carat gold flakes are sprinkled on top and it is made with the finest Tahitian vanilla beans.
Gib: Gold? This better be good.
Waiter: Oh, you will love it.
(Gib takes a sip of the coffee on his table, he instantly spits it out, the waiter looks confused)
Gib: What is this crap?
Waiter: The finest free trade coffee in the world.
Gib: I like taster’s choice instant coffee better
(The waiter looks appalled and Adam snickers, Gib picks the flower off the top of the sundae)
Gib: Who puts a flower on a ****ing ice cream sundae.
Adam: Actually, it tastes pretty good.
(Adam is enjoying the ice cream, Gib finally takes a spoonful before picking the dish up and slamming it on the ground)
Gib: Let’s get out of here, this stuff sucks. There has to be a Friendly’s around, I can get a Jim dandy for like six bucks and there is bananas in that!
(Adam laughs as Gib slaps several hundred dollar bills on the table. The waiter comes over looking appalled)
Gib: If you ever try to feed me a Golden Oppulence sundae again, I am going to slap you in the face with my pecker and give you a golden shower
(Gib storms out, and Adam follows apologizing for him)
(Scene reopens to a patio bar, the two are having a beer. Adam normally doesn't drink, but he is enjoying some time with his good friend.)
Adam: Dude, what was that all about, I know you are an angry old bastard, but even you went a little overboard in there.
Gib: Yeah, I have a lot of **** on my mind.
Adam: Like…
Gib: this letter…
(He pulls a crumbled letter from his pocket)
Gib: This lady sent me this letter, saying she was pregnant, saying she wanted nothing to do with me, but this woman she screwed like a racehorse, but I am a good man, I let her alone. She wanted to raise the child with her husband.
Adam: Dude, you have another kid?
Gib: Yeah, somewhere out there.
Adam: Scary…
(Gib slides the letter over to Adam as he stares at the beer bottle in his hand, looking unusually somber.)
Adam: So is this where you've been this whole time you were gone? Searching for this other kid.
Gib: Yeah, I had to find him or her, to just see how they were.
(Adam starts to read the letter and he gets to the bottom and something grabs his attention.)
Adam: Sincerely “Mary”?
Gib: Yeah, “Mary Coleman” I remember that name, she was amazing Adam.
(Adam's jaw drops and he looks really confused now.)
Adam: That's weird... my mom's name was Mary... Mary Coleman, her maiden name.
Gib: Hmm, what a coincidence...
Adam: Where did you met her?
Gib: Dallas…
(Adam’s face turns red and he swallows slowly)
Adam: I was raised in Dallas, Dude.. are you my father?
(Gib sits, thinking for quite awhile, he hand set against his head he finally responds)
Gib: No, you are too ugly or that, and I got this letter nineteen years ago, I know you are a young buck but you aren’t that young…
Adam: Yeah, good point, I'm about to be 29, so your kid would have to be born about ten years after.......
(A look of realization crosses Adam’s face… His eyes bug out of his head and his jaw almost hits the ground. Gib looks at him confused now.)
Adam: You son of a bitch!
(Adam stands and walks out of the patio, Gib confused stands and follows)
Gib: What man?
(Gib continues to pursue Adam as the scene fades)
Adam: Dude, why did you bring me here?
Gib: I ordered us two of those thousand dollar sundaes
Adam: A thousand dollar ice cream sundae? Where did you get the money for that? I know old man Fox isn’t paying you that much.
Gib: It is the fine money dude, I kick fine people, the office docks their check and gives me the money, I spend the money. It is like the directions on the shampoo bottle dude, wash, rinse and repeat.
Adam: Only you. What is this ice cream all about?
Gib: I don’t know, but for a thousand bucks they better bring it out in a ****ing garbage can!
(almost on cue about four people emerge with the sundaes. The sundaes are not brought to them in a garbage can but instead in a crystal glass, the ice cream is gold and a golden sugar flower adorns the top, they present the sundaes to them and Adam looks impressed, Gib however looks confused)
Gib: Where is the rest?
Waiter: This is it, the golden sundae, twenty four carat gold flakes are sprinkled on top and it is made with the finest Tahitian vanilla beans.
Gib: Gold? This better be good.
Waiter: Oh, you will love it.
(Gib takes a sip of the coffee on his table, he instantly spits it out, the waiter looks confused)
Gib: What is this crap?
Waiter: The finest free trade coffee in the world.
Gib: I like taster’s choice instant coffee better
(The waiter looks appalled and Adam snickers, Gib picks the flower off the top of the sundae)
Gib: Who puts a flower on a ****ing ice cream sundae.
Adam: Actually, it tastes pretty good.
(Adam is enjoying the ice cream, Gib finally takes a spoonful before picking the dish up and slamming it on the ground)
Gib: Let’s get out of here, this stuff sucks. There has to be a Friendly’s around, I can get a Jim dandy for like six bucks and there is bananas in that!
(Adam laughs as Gib slaps several hundred dollar bills on the table. The waiter comes over looking appalled)
Gib: If you ever try to feed me a Golden Oppulence sundae again, I am going to slap you in the face with my pecker and give you a golden shower
(Gib storms out, and Adam follows apologizing for him)
(Scene reopens to a patio bar, the two are having a beer. Adam normally doesn't drink, but he is enjoying some time with his good friend.)
Adam: Dude, what was that all about, I know you are an angry old bastard, but even you went a little overboard in there.
Gib: Yeah, I have a lot of **** on my mind.
Adam: Like…
Gib: this letter…
(He pulls a crumbled letter from his pocket)
Gib: This lady sent me this letter, saying she was pregnant, saying she wanted nothing to do with me, but this woman she screwed like a racehorse, but I am a good man, I let her alone. She wanted to raise the child with her husband.
Adam: Dude, you have another kid?
Gib: Yeah, somewhere out there.
Adam: Scary…
(Gib slides the letter over to Adam as he stares at the beer bottle in his hand, looking unusually somber.)
Adam: So is this where you've been this whole time you were gone? Searching for this other kid.
Gib: Yeah, I had to find him or her, to just see how they were.
(Adam starts to read the letter and he gets to the bottom and something grabs his attention.)
Adam: Sincerely “Mary”?
Gib: Yeah, “Mary Coleman” I remember that name, she was amazing Adam.
(Adam's jaw drops and he looks really confused now.)
Adam: That's weird... my mom's name was Mary... Mary Coleman, her maiden name.
Gib: Hmm, what a coincidence...
Adam: Where did you met her?
Gib: Dallas…
(Adam’s face turns red and he swallows slowly)
Adam: I was raised in Dallas, Dude.. are you my father?
(Gib sits, thinking for quite awhile, he hand set against his head he finally responds)
Gib: No, you are too ugly or that, and I got this letter nineteen years ago, I know you are a young buck but you aren’t that young…
Adam: Yeah, good point, I'm about to be 29, so your kid would have to be born about ten years after.......
(A look of realization crosses Adam’s face… His eyes bug out of his head and his jaw almost hits the ground. Gib looks at him confused now.)
Adam: You son of a bitch!
(Adam stands and walks out of the patio, Gib confused stands and follows)
Gib: What man?
(Gib continues to pursue Adam as the scene fades)