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Post by Jimmy Zane on Oct 30, 2007 21:17:40 GMT -6
A blind man interviews for a job as a quality controller at the local wood mill. The manager calls the blind man into his office and asks him how he expected to do this job since he was blind. The blind man replied he would do it by smell. The manager decides to test him and places a piece of wood in front of him. The manager asks, "What is it without touching it?" The blind man replies, "That�s a good piece of fir." "Correct,� says the manager, �now try this one." "That�s a bad piece of willow," says the blind man. "Correct," answers the manager.
With that, the manager decides to play a trick on the blind man. He get his secretary to lift up her dress and put her crotch in the blind mans face. "I'm confused,� says the blind man, �Can you turn it around?" The secretary turns around and puts her ass in his face. The blind man says, "Oh, you�re trying to fool me! But I know exactly what kind of wood that is. It�s the **** house door off a tuna boat!"
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Post by Jimmy Zane on Oct 30, 2007 21:27:23 GMT -6
and one more before I go to bed!!! A kindergarten teacher one day is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely" to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. The first student raised his hand and said "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said, "Well, that isn't entirely correct, because sometimes it's gray and cloudy". Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher again replies "If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct either." Another student raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher looked at him and said "No...But that isn't really a question you want to ask in class discussion." So the student replies, "Then I definitely **** my pants." ;D   |
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Post by Jimmy Zane on Oct 30, 2007 21:30:05 GMT -6
OK, came across this one......had to post before heading off to bed!!
Dirty Little Matt is sitting in the back of math class, obviously not paying any attention, when the teacher calls his name.
"Yeah teach?" he replies.
"If there are three ducks on a fence and you shoot one of them with a shotgun, how many are left?" asks the teacher.
Matt answers "Well, teach, if I shoot one of them with a shotgun, the loud noise is gonna make them all fly off."
"No, Matt, there will be two left if you shoot one with a shotgun, but I like the way you're thinking." the teacher responds.
"Well, teach, I've got a question for you... There are 3 women that come out of an ice-cream parlor, one is biting her ice-cream cone, one is licking it, and one is sucking on it. Which one is married?"
The teacher, a little taken back by the question answers, "Well, uh, gee Matt, I guess the one that's sucking on the ice cream."
Matt replies "No teach, the one that has the wedding ring on her finger, but I like the way you're thinking!"
HA HA HA HA THATS SMURFING SMURF!!
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Post by Bannedingo on Oct 30, 2007 23:00:38 GMT -6
a guy walks up to another guy..and kicks him right in the nads..the end
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Post by recklessjack on Oct 30, 2007 23:02:55 GMT -6
What was his motive for the nad kicking? Did he steal his woman? Perhaps his car?
Hmm... I'll give this joke a lot of thought and get back to you in the morning.
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Post by boppodclown on Oct 31, 2007 12:38:49 GMT -6
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
That Punisher.....HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
WHAT A CARD! HA HA HA HA HA HA
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Christian Kane
Full Member
Well Personally I'd like to slay the dragon
Posts: 548
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Post by Christian Kane on Nov 2, 2007 19:44:18 GMT -6
Knock Knock......The end
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