Post by Steven Luke on Oct 23, 2010 1:24:00 GMT -6
We open back up on the Gun Show set. Venom is now sitting behind the desk drinking from a coffee mug. He sets the mug down and grabs a pile of index cards. He straightens them out on the desk in front of them before looking into the camera and smiling.
"Welcome back to the Gun Show. We don't have a guest this week so we're going to do something new. We're going start off with a new segment this week where we review the previous week."
"First on the list here is the tragic issue with Hugo Conway. No one really seems to know what is going on with the rookie as of yet. The young man jumped out of an air plane and did some extreme ironing...wait...who in the hell iron's extremely? Seriously people, what is the point of ironing a pair of pants while free falling from God only knows how high in the air? What kind of kick do people get out of ironing in mid air? Is it a better way to get creases in your pants? Someone out there in TV land please write me and explain this to me."
"Anyway, somehow this had nothing to do with his injury this week. It appears that Conway landed safely and then seemed to experience some sort of heart failure. The Conway camp has been quiet since the incident. I personally have watched the tape several times to try and get some insight on what may or may not be wrong with Conway and I am stumped. All I can think of is that it may be the curse of the Conway name. Don't be surprised is Hugo has to show up at Road to the Gold four has to show up in a wheel chair."
Venom tosses the first index card over his shoulder and continues on.
"We also continued the now huge rivalry between Falcon and Andrew Jacobsen when Zelda planted one on the young under achiever. Can anyone say Kelly, Adam, Awesome part two? I know I can and now these two will go head to head again this week at Road to the Gold and this time it seems that they are fighting for there princess. My only question is who is Bowser and who is Mario?"
"If I can figure that out It will make my decision a little later a little bit easier because everyone knows I pull for the underdog, AKA, the bad guy. These two have been doing a lot of talking back and forth though, and our next highlight is not as much a highlight as it is the lack of highlights. My other two opponents for the Road to the Gold pay per view extravaganza not only lost this past week, they lost on the web show."
Venom shrugs his shoulders.
"If that wasn't enough both men have been like Tibetan Monks this week, on a vow of silence. I have no clue where these guys' heads are because of that, but I don't even need to know. These two are on the downside of there respected careers and they have absolutely no chance against me anyway. They can go ahead and renew there vows of silence because speaking up about the situation at hand wont even come close to helping them."
Venom again tosses the index card over his shoulder and continues on.
"They really don't matter though. They actually counted as lack of headlines so lets get to the real headlines. This week we again get the 'Honor' of being able to see the NCW's hottest tag team compete in a match on the preshow. Knightington will be taking on whatever Evan Andrews and Brad Kane are calling themselves. That though is not the headline I'm concerned with this week. The headline I'm concerned with is that Knightington are still undefeated after months of teaming together and yet they are on the preshow while two rookies to this company get a shot at the Tag Team Championships."
"This is big new to me. If you're not going to give the Young Guns the rematch they rightfully deserve then you could at least give a title shot to the next best team in the form of Knightington. Instead the NCW brass gives us a duo of rookies to the NCW in a huge spot on one of the biggest pay per views of the year. If these Frank Sinatra loving rookies can pull this off not only will it be a huge upset on one of the years biggest pay per views but it will be a slap in the face to the boys in the tag division that have spent months trying to make this division relevant again."
"That though is not the biggest story of the week though. The biggest story of the week was obviously the Road to the Gold Tournament. Charlie Velez, my Brother in Law and pick to win, went one on one with the other man that ran through the tournament, Dave Holland. Me and Dave go way back, not quite as far as me and Charlie, but I am proud to say that he is our Road to the Gold tournament winner."
Venom raises his hand in defense.
"I know, I know, you all want to know whats wrong with me but I have much respect for Dave Holland even if he did beat Charlie to get this title shot. I am excited about his win. I am excited because for the NCW this was a win/win situation. Either Charlie Velez won and went on to rid the NCW of a joke of a Champion or Dave Holland won and went on to rid the NCW of a joke of a Champion. When this week comes to a close we will have a champion we can be proud of and you can take that to the bank."
Venom slams his hand down on the desk and then tosses all of the index cards up in the air and they rain down behind him.
"That my friends was this weeks headlines. It was a big week leading up to an even bigger Pay per view this weekend. We will be right back after this short break with this weeks predictions and a recap of how I did last week."
Fade to commercial.
"Welcome back to the Gun Show. We don't have a guest this week so we're going to do something new. We're going start off with a new segment this week where we review the previous week."
"First on the list here is the tragic issue with Hugo Conway. No one really seems to know what is going on with the rookie as of yet. The young man jumped out of an air plane and did some extreme ironing...wait...who in the hell iron's extremely? Seriously people, what is the point of ironing a pair of pants while free falling from God only knows how high in the air? What kind of kick do people get out of ironing in mid air? Is it a better way to get creases in your pants? Someone out there in TV land please write me and explain this to me."
"Anyway, somehow this had nothing to do with his injury this week. It appears that Conway landed safely and then seemed to experience some sort of heart failure. The Conway camp has been quiet since the incident. I personally have watched the tape several times to try and get some insight on what may or may not be wrong with Conway and I am stumped. All I can think of is that it may be the curse of the Conway name. Don't be surprised is Hugo has to show up at Road to the Gold four has to show up in a wheel chair."
Venom tosses the first index card over his shoulder and continues on.
"We also continued the now huge rivalry between Falcon and Andrew Jacobsen when Zelda planted one on the young under achiever. Can anyone say Kelly, Adam, Awesome part two? I know I can and now these two will go head to head again this week at Road to the Gold and this time it seems that they are fighting for there princess. My only question is who is Bowser and who is Mario?"
"If I can figure that out It will make my decision a little later a little bit easier because everyone knows I pull for the underdog, AKA, the bad guy. These two have been doing a lot of talking back and forth though, and our next highlight is not as much a highlight as it is the lack of highlights. My other two opponents for the Road to the Gold pay per view extravaganza not only lost this past week, they lost on the web show."
Venom shrugs his shoulders.
"If that wasn't enough both men have been like Tibetan Monks this week, on a vow of silence. I have no clue where these guys' heads are because of that, but I don't even need to know. These two are on the downside of there respected careers and they have absolutely no chance against me anyway. They can go ahead and renew there vows of silence because speaking up about the situation at hand wont even come close to helping them."
Venom again tosses the index card over his shoulder and continues on.
"They really don't matter though. They actually counted as lack of headlines so lets get to the real headlines. This week we again get the 'Honor' of being able to see the NCW's hottest tag team compete in a match on the preshow. Knightington will be taking on whatever Evan Andrews and Brad Kane are calling themselves. That though is not the headline I'm concerned with this week. The headline I'm concerned with is that Knightington are still undefeated after months of teaming together and yet they are on the preshow while two rookies to this company get a shot at the Tag Team Championships."
"This is big new to me. If you're not going to give the Young Guns the rematch they rightfully deserve then you could at least give a title shot to the next best team in the form of Knightington. Instead the NCW brass gives us a duo of rookies to the NCW in a huge spot on one of the biggest pay per views of the year. If these Frank Sinatra loving rookies can pull this off not only will it be a huge upset on one of the years biggest pay per views but it will be a slap in the face to the boys in the tag division that have spent months trying to make this division relevant again."
"That though is not the biggest story of the week though. The biggest story of the week was obviously the Road to the Gold Tournament. Charlie Velez, my Brother in Law and pick to win, went one on one with the other man that ran through the tournament, Dave Holland. Me and Dave go way back, not quite as far as me and Charlie, but I am proud to say that he is our Road to the Gold tournament winner."
Venom raises his hand in defense.
"I know, I know, you all want to know whats wrong with me but I have much respect for Dave Holland even if he did beat Charlie to get this title shot. I am excited about his win. I am excited because for the NCW this was a win/win situation. Either Charlie Velez won and went on to rid the NCW of a joke of a Champion or Dave Holland won and went on to rid the NCW of a joke of a Champion. When this week comes to a close we will have a champion we can be proud of and you can take that to the bank."
Venom slams his hand down on the desk and then tosses all of the index cards up in the air and they rain down behind him.
"That my friends was this weeks headlines. It was a big week leading up to an even bigger Pay per view this weekend. We will be right back after this short break with this weeks predictions and a recap of how I did last week."
Fade to commercial.