Post by "Mr. Showtime" Johnny Holliday on Oct 27, 2010 23:59:46 GMT -6
Ladies and gentlemen (and Ander Carvetti) of nCW:
First and foremost, I'd like to say that I'm NOT being pressed to write this by anyone, but I felt the need to get it out there for the sake of getting it out there. I didn't exactly want to make things public at first. I wanted to keep things private between AK and I...but, honestly, nCw...as I've seen, is actually a community, and it isn't a bunch of pricks like a few former e-feds I've been in (and since I know they're continuing to 'monitor' Jesse [Carvetti] and I, I'd like to let them know that they're pricks and nCw's talent and OOC community is 10 times better than anything they could have). In essence, I feel everyone deserves an explanation.
First and foremost, I'd like to issue an apology to all of you...most notably to Sam (Joe Everyman) and Freakke (...erm, whatever your real name is). When Jesse and I joined, we seemed to have picked you two out as bothersome. At the same time, we were being harassed (well, we viewed it as harassment) by others. Sure, with the whole new guys and harassment, I get it. Things got out of hand, and I'm quick to jump the gun and assume the negative or hostile things are going on. That is my bad, and I apologize. I still don't know where Brad Kane stands OOC, but that's for him to let me know.
Generally, I was putting up a daily disclaimer: don't take things I say seriously because I joke around. I joke around a lot, and for the most part, I can be pretty easy-going about it. I do take it too far some times, so please, if I do, let me know.
As for the 'new guy' thing. Character-wise, my character won't understand/accept the 'new guy working at the bottom' thing. That's his persona. It's not mine. I get it. I'm one of the new people to the e-fed, and of course I'm going to have to earn it. Johnny Holliday is a trash-talking guy with an ego. If you want any sort of real life comparison, you need to look no further than The Rock (for his charisma/attitude), Stone Cold Steve Austin (in terms of toughness and short fuse for anger), and Shawn Michaels (again, for charisma and attitude...mostly DX-esque). The whole Rat Pack plan is simply to be much like the 2006-on version of DX, having fun, making pranks, and stuff. I went the wrong direction in the beginning, so I'm steering the character onto the right path for it. I just ask for some time and to bear with it. Those of you who have had your characters respond in RP's - you've responded perfectly. It's fantastic. I honestly think that it is fantastic that I turned to many heads so fast.
I forget who made the comment in the chatbox about Jesse and I (Deez, Black Jesus, or Steve...I really don't remember), in saying that "These new guys are really going to have to make us work". Honestly, whoever said it - thank you. No bull****, no fringes...nothing. Thank you, because that is quite honestly one of the greatest compliments I've had about my writing in a LONG time. I really felt as of late that I've been lackluster, sucking, and...not really 'wow'ing anybody. Then, Jesse and I were placed in for the tag-title matchup (which shocked me). I then thought...either we're both doing something right, Jesse's carrying me, or this was because there's no viable tag-team that could challenge.
I'll be honest - I think what I write is ****. Then again, you are your own harshest critic, so I'll never think what I write is 'fantastic'.
...
Anyways.
Speaking of time, and such...
Recently (and by recently, I mean this past Tuesday) one of my Grandmothers suffered a massive heart attack. She required three stents in three major arteries, and needed to be transferred to a different ICU in Florida because she has an infection in her heart. The transfer was because the ICU she was at did not have the equipment to handle the situation.
Also, recently, people I have either just met or known for a little bit have been dying, and they're around my age. I'm 23, and most recently, someone died at the age of 25. While their deaths have not brought about sadness in me, it's simply drained me. Personally, I have no deep-rooted hidden feelings about death. It's happened all around me my entire life. To use the term 'dropping like flies' would be an almost adequate analogy, if I didn't have the lingering feeling it was inappropriate to describe the loss of human life. Nonetheless, I just seem to have no emotion to it. It's kind of 'stone facing' it. Not sadness, not upset...but I am indeed drained.
And (lucky you guys), I am someone who "suffers" from manic depression and anxiety issues. I will not blame this on my actions out of character. I have fully functional cognitive thought, and as such, am responsible for my reactions. I've no right to take it (my anger, anxiety, etc.) out on anyone. This is the first time I'm "coming out" with it on such a public scale. I'm not looking for sympathy or anything of the sort, I thought that I'd try saying it here before I begin admitting it to friends in real life and things. Baby steps to cope, if you will.
There is absolutely a lot that is going on in my life, and I very briefly spoke to Adam about retirement, effective immediately. Then again, in doing so, this would end an upcoming feud with a tag-team that I would very much like to work with, as well as ending ties with Jesse as my tag-partner and achieving the final goal of my e-fedding 'career' - getting the tag-belts with my best friend from a different state. As those who frequent the chatbox know,
I've known Jesse since 2003, and this is the first time we've actually been a tag-team. In the past, in character, we've just been best friends as singles wrestlers. At the same time I met Jesse, I also met Drew Helms (Trent Helms here in nCw) and Adam Knite, though I didn't speak to Adam much then. There was also a Diamond Dave, though I don't know if he was in IWF with us then.
So, there really isn't a way for me to retire without disappointing people. Plus, as Adam and I discussed...honestly, nobody ever stays retired. I'm sure if I retired Johnny Holliday after 12 years of using him, I'd come up with some new character, get bored, then bring back Holliday.
I've considered the notion of asking for time off, but I couldn't give a definitive time frame, and as such, would be unreasonable and unfair.
It leaves me with the option to try and 'do what I can' in RP's. This would mean essentially half-assing things. That's not fair for the judges to read, the bookers to even book me, or my opponents because I'm not giving them a challenge they deserve (though I'm sure people would welcome easy wins, right?).
I started e-fedding way back when it was simply e-mailing, in November of 1998. I was 11 years old. Chat rooms were around, but nobody was using them prominently. I was NOTHING like how I write now, obviously. X-Net wrestling used to be around before RoughKut and ranked both sites and individual e-fedders on their weekly & monthly list. I took tremendous pride in being named one of the absolute best. I take pride in bringing it to the table and, if I can, help those who are looking to continually develop their character.
I don't know what it is that everyone likes so much about my RP's, but the most common thread seems to be the solid character development. Yes, I've got an answer for essentially everything Holliday does. What he likes to eat, drink, watch on TV, read, favorite movies, where he went to school, blahblahblahblahblah. That sort of intricate details takes YEARS to come up with, and it generally ends up being an offshoot of your own personality in real life. I question authority, I enjoy the spotlight, and I enjoy being charismatic. At the same time, what I say out loud may not always be what I'm thinking (much like things Holliday says out loud may not be what he thinks in the italic font).
I'm trying to figure out how to get things to work while coping with everything that is going on, adjusting to a job that I start on November 9th (which will be a 45-hour/week minimum), and attempting to find the drive/will to write.
Having the energy drained out of me puts me in a place, mentally, that I don't want to write. I have ideas, but those are reserved for a side character that I don't want to bring in. My two main issues are time and the will to write.
I don't want to retire, nor do I want to be unfair to anyone I've agreed to do a storyline with or have an opponent. I'm booked against DDK this week, and to say "I quit" (which I was planning to just post a two-word RP this week saying that) would be unfair to him - especially if he had begun working on a piece.
With that said, I'm asking nCw to limit me in terms of matches for the time being, just until I can get everything sorted out. Everyone in life has things going on - some more than others. "Mr. Showtime" Johnny Holliday has established a great foundation in nCw already (even if his Win/Loss record doesn't say so), and I don't feel like just ending it. I knew going in that the weekly show basis was going to kick my ass when I joined and found a full-time job, but I'll figure it out.
I'm not asking to not be booked. I'm asking like...well, for the time being, maybe I write segments for Holliday for the show, so things continue, and if I have the ability to RP for matches, I will. I don't know if it would be deemed annoying to ask me every week if I want a match or not, especially if a storyline is going to go in motion.
So, staff, if you've got an idea on how to handle this while not completely killing off what I've started with Holliday, shoot me an idea. I'd love to hear it and try to make it work.
My goal is to have Holliday become tag-champs in the future with Carvetti. I also share the same goal to have Holliday become World Champ eventually (though, I think that's everyone's ultimate goal, no?).
DDK - I'm not going to no-show, and I'll give you a challenge. I don't like being booked and then no-showing. It's not fair to you. Don't worry about that.
Yeah, I'm going through a lot, but we're human beings. We survive. Adapt. move on. I guess, pardon my possible absenteeism from time-to-time as I try to adapt to these major situations, and Alex Jones - we'll work that storyline out, I promise.
---
With all sincerity,
J.P. Salazar (hey...my manager's name is Jon Salazar...gee, I wonder where the name came from...?)
First and foremost, I'd like to say that I'm NOT being pressed to write this by anyone, but I felt the need to get it out there for the sake of getting it out there. I didn't exactly want to make things public at first. I wanted to keep things private between AK and I...but, honestly, nCw...as I've seen, is actually a community, and it isn't a bunch of pricks like a few former e-feds I've been in (and since I know they're continuing to 'monitor' Jesse [Carvetti] and I, I'd like to let them know that they're pricks and nCw's talent and OOC community is 10 times better than anything they could have). In essence, I feel everyone deserves an explanation.
First and foremost, I'd like to issue an apology to all of you...most notably to Sam (Joe Everyman) and Freakke (...erm, whatever your real name is). When Jesse and I joined, we seemed to have picked you two out as bothersome. At the same time, we were being harassed (well, we viewed it as harassment) by others. Sure, with the whole new guys and harassment, I get it. Things got out of hand, and I'm quick to jump the gun and assume the negative or hostile things are going on. That is my bad, and I apologize. I still don't know where Brad Kane stands OOC, but that's for him to let me know.
Generally, I was putting up a daily disclaimer: don't take things I say seriously because I joke around. I joke around a lot, and for the most part, I can be pretty easy-going about it. I do take it too far some times, so please, if I do, let me know.
As for the 'new guy' thing. Character-wise, my character won't understand/accept the 'new guy working at the bottom' thing. That's his persona. It's not mine. I get it. I'm one of the new people to the e-fed, and of course I'm going to have to earn it. Johnny Holliday is a trash-talking guy with an ego. If you want any sort of real life comparison, you need to look no further than The Rock (for his charisma/attitude), Stone Cold Steve Austin (in terms of toughness and short fuse for anger), and Shawn Michaels (again, for charisma and attitude...mostly DX-esque). The whole Rat Pack plan is simply to be much like the 2006-on version of DX, having fun, making pranks, and stuff. I went the wrong direction in the beginning, so I'm steering the character onto the right path for it. I just ask for some time and to bear with it. Those of you who have had your characters respond in RP's - you've responded perfectly. It's fantastic. I honestly think that it is fantastic that I turned to many heads so fast.
I forget who made the comment in the chatbox about Jesse and I (Deez, Black Jesus, or Steve...I really don't remember), in saying that "These new guys are really going to have to make us work". Honestly, whoever said it - thank you. No bull****, no fringes...nothing. Thank you, because that is quite honestly one of the greatest compliments I've had about my writing in a LONG time. I really felt as of late that I've been lackluster, sucking, and...not really 'wow'ing anybody. Then, Jesse and I were placed in for the tag-title matchup (which shocked me). I then thought...either we're both doing something right, Jesse's carrying me, or this was because there's no viable tag-team that could challenge.
I'll be honest - I think what I write is ****. Then again, you are your own harshest critic, so I'll never think what I write is 'fantastic'.
...
Anyways.
Speaking of time, and such...
Recently (and by recently, I mean this past Tuesday) one of my Grandmothers suffered a massive heart attack. She required three stents in three major arteries, and needed to be transferred to a different ICU in Florida because she has an infection in her heart. The transfer was because the ICU she was at did not have the equipment to handle the situation.
Also, recently, people I have either just met or known for a little bit have been dying, and they're around my age. I'm 23, and most recently, someone died at the age of 25. While their deaths have not brought about sadness in me, it's simply drained me. Personally, I have no deep-rooted hidden feelings about death. It's happened all around me my entire life. To use the term 'dropping like flies' would be an almost adequate analogy, if I didn't have the lingering feeling it was inappropriate to describe the loss of human life. Nonetheless, I just seem to have no emotion to it. It's kind of 'stone facing' it. Not sadness, not upset...but I am indeed drained.
And (lucky you guys), I am someone who "suffers" from manic depression and anxiety issues. I will not blame this on my actions out of character. I have fully functional cognitive thought, and as such, am responsible for my reactions. I've no right to take it (my anger, anxiety, etc.) out on anyone. This is the first time I'm "coming out" with it on such a public scale. I'm not looking for sympathy or anything of the sort, I thought that I'd try saying it here before I begin admitting it to friends in real life and things. Baby steps to cope, if you will.
There is absolutely a lot that is going on in my life, and I very briefly spoke to Adam about retirement, effective immediately. Then again, in doing so, this would end an upcoming feud with a tag-team that I would very much like to work with, as well as ending ties with Jesse as my tag-partner and achieving the final goal of my e-fedding 'career' - getting the tag-belts with my best friend from a different state. As those who frequent the chatbox know,
I've known Jesse since 2003, and this is the first time we've actually been a tag-team. In the past, in character, we've just been best friends as singles wrestlers. At the same time I met Jesse, I also met Drew Helms (Trent Helms here in nCw) and Adam Knite, though I didn't speak to Adam much then. There was also a Diamond Dave, though I don't know if he was in IWF with us then.
So, there really isn't a way for me to retire without disappointing people. Plus, as Adam and I discussed...honestly, nobody ever stays retired. I'm sure if I retired Johnny Holliday after 12 years of using him, I'd come up with some new character, get bored, then bring back Holliday.
I've considered the notion of asking for time off, but I couldn't give a definitive time frame, and as such, would be unreasonable and unfair.
It leaves me with the option to try and 'do what I can' in RP's. This would mean essentially half-assing things. That's not fair for the judges to read, the bookers to even book me, or my opponents because I'm not giving them a challenge they deserve (though I'm sure people would welcome easy wins, right?).
I started e-fedding way back when it was simply e-mailing, in November of 1998. I was 11 years old. Chat rooms were around, but nobody was using them prominently. I was NOTHING like how I write now, obviously. X-Net wrestling used to be around before RoughKut and ranked both sites and individual e-fedders on their weekly & monthly list. I took tremendous pride in being named one of the absolute best. I take pride in bringing it to the table and, if I can, help those who are looking to continually develop their character.
I don't know what it is that everyone likes so much about my RP's, but the most common thread seems to be the solid character development. Yes, I've got an answer for essentially everything Holliday does. What he likes to eat, drink, watch on TV, read, favorite movies, where he went to school, blahblahblahblahblah. That sort of intricate details takes YEARS to come up with, and it generally ends up being an offshoot of your own personality in real life. I question authority, I enjoy the spotlight, and I enjoy being charismatic. At the same time, what I say out loud may not always be what I'm thinking (much like things Holliday says out loud may not be what he thinks in the italic font).
I'm trying to figure out how to get things to work while coping with everything that is going on, adjusting to a job that I start on November 9th (which will be a 45-hour/week minimum), and attempting to find the drive/will to write.
Having the energy drained out of me puts me in a place, mentally, that I don't want to write. I have ideas, but those are reserved for a side character that I don't want to bring in. My two main issues are time and the will to write.
I don't want to retire, nor do I want to be unfair to anyone I've agreed to do a storyline with or have an opponent. I'm booked against DDK this week, and to say "I quit" (which I was planning to just post a two-word RP this week saying that) would be unfair to him - especially if he had begun working on a piece.
With that said, I'm asking nCw to limit me in terms of matches for the time being, just until I can get everything sorted out. Everyone in life has things going on - some more than others. "Mr. Showtime" Johnny Holliday has established a great foundation in nCw already (even if his Win/Loss record doesn't say so), and I don't feel like just ending it. I knew going in that the weekly show basis was going to kick my ass when I joined and found a full-time job, but I'll figure it out.
I'm not asking to not be booked. I'm asking like...well, for the time being, maybe I write segments for Holliday for the show, so things continue, and if I have the ability to RP for matches, I will. I don't know if it would be deemed annoying to ask me every week if I want a match or not, especially if a storyline is going to go in motion.
So, staff, if you've got an idea on how to handle this while not completely killing off what I've started with Holliday, shoot me an idea. I'd love to hear it and try to make it work.
My goal is to have Holliday become tag-champs in the future with Carvetti. I also share the same goal to have Holliday become World Champ eventually (though, I think that's everyone's ultimate goal, no?).
DDK - I'm not going to no-show, and I'll give you a challenge. I don't like being booked and then no-showing. It's not fair to you. Don't worry about that.
Yeah, I'm going through a lot, but we're human beings. We survive. Adapt. move on. I guess, pardon my possible absenteeism from time-to-time as I try to adapt to these major situations, and Alex Jones - we'll work that storyline out, I promise.
---
With all sincerity,
J.P. Salazar (hey...my manager's name is Jon Salazar...gee, I wonder where the name came from...?)
