Post by Charlie Velez on Mar 8, 2011 18:06:06 GMT -6
I…I don’t believe it.
I can’t believe it. The whole idea of it being true is…well, farfetched. Why would she do it to me; make me choose between the two things that I love the most? Why would she hurt me as much as she’s hurting me right now?
I’ve spent more of my life with her then I have without her; I’ve shared secrets, I’ve expressed my love more to her than I have to anybody else in my life. To my mother, to my father, to my brother…she stands number one in my heart.
So why would she do this to me?
Maybe she thinks that I don’t love her as much as she loves me, that all the things that I’ve done; the times that I’ve left her to wrestle finally took a toll on her, maybe she’s just sick and tired of watching me hurt myself and wants me to stay home. To watch our children grow up, to grow old together…
“Charlie, what the hell was that!?”
Venom screams at me from behind. I’m obviously not in a condition to argue; I just fall on my couch, and let him give it to me.
“You can’t concentrate for three seconds!? What the hell is wrong with you man, you’re the *** damn World Champion; you’re supposed to be better than that man! But no, you have too much stupid **** going on in your life that you can’t pay attention to the *** damn match at hand!”
I would argue, but he has a point. This whole thing has turned my world upside down. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, and I’ve just been physically weak from this whole thing. Being a World Champion doesn’t matter to me anymore…
…and that means she’s winning this fight.
Venom calms down a bit, but I can still see the fire in his eyes. He’s a competitor, one of the best I’ve ever seen, and I know that ever loss, no matter how small the consequences hurt. But we’ve been through a lot together, and he understands that this isn’t me…this is just a shell of my former self.
“So who was that out there, was it her? Was it Annette?”
I can’t bear to look at him; I just let the thoughts run through my head. I know what I saw…
Her face was covered, the hood just covering her face. But it’s something that she owned, her pants, her shoes, they were all items of clothing that she has in her wardrobe. But that’s not even what convinces me…it was her smell. Her aura, the perfume that I bought her for our anniversary…it was all there. The way her hair fell, her scent…
It had to be her.
“I don’t know, but whoever it was is really playing games with me right now.”
“You listen now Charlie, I know you love her, but she’s messing everything up. This is your first World title run, and hell, with the condition you’re in it might be your last! This is supposed to be the pinnacle of your career, the highlight of your LIFE. We’re in our primes Charlie, we’re on top, and you’re going to let HER get in the way!?”
I can’t take it anymore. I thrust up from my seat, and I get in his face. He’s not budging an inch, and our foreheads are against each other.
“Don’t you DARE speak of my wife that way!”
“Look at you man, you’ve gotten soft, you’ve become a shell of yourself! Charlie Velez a few months ago would have laughed and agreed with me, but now you’re just a whiny little bitch!”
I raise my fist up, and my other hand grabs his throat. I shove him against the wall, the back of his head bouncing off the wall. He has this sick smile on his face, nodding his head.
“Yeah, this is the Charlie I know. Punch me, knock my teeth out, give me a black eye, and hurt the only friend you have right now. Do it Charlie…”
I can’t look at him, I try to avoid making eye contact with him but he just continues to scream, continues to urge me punch him, to hurt him, to show him what true power I really have.
“DO IT!”
I swing, punching the wall right next to his face. I let him go, and I just continue to wail away at the wall, trying to make a dent in the concrete. My hands get bloodied, and all the frustration that has been building the past couple of weeks has come out at full force. My hands are numb.
My fingers are bleeding.
My knuckles probably shattered.
I feel to my knees, because I don’t deserve to stand up with my head down. I deserve to be down on my knees, praying to end this misery. To end this all, to finally become the man my father envisioned I would be, the man I expect to be.
The man she wants me to be…
“Charlie, we’re going to get to the bottom of this man. You just need to concentrate on the goal at hand…”
He continues to talk, give me words of encouragement, but I can’t listen. My mind is fogged by these disturbing thoughts, and no matter how much Venom stands behind me, I know I’m all alone.
I’m alone, just me and a championship that’s tearing my life apart.
“I’m at a Crossroads in my life…
Stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Insert any other clever analogy you can to tell everybody how screwed I am.
It didn’t start when I faced Falcon a month ago; hell, Kyle might think that he’s the cause of all this, but you can’t flatter a fool like him for giving him credit for something he had nothing to do with. No, it happened two months prior, when I was facing Dave Holland. When the road to my championship reign started, that’s when it all began. You know, it’s something that I should have prepared myself for; I watched my best friend go through it, I’ve watched my mentor, I’ve watched everybody when they tried to become champion. It tears away at them, it eats them apart, it makes them question if they choose the right profession. I should have been more prepared but…
You live and you learn, huh?
That’s something that my opponents are going to learn. You live, and you learn. You live in a life where you start throwing out challenges to opponents like me, you know, the World champion; you’re going to learn a very valuable lesson. I’m the champion for the reason. I’m champion because I’m better than absolutely every other opponent this company has to offer, I stand above a class of mediocre, not too bright superstars in a federation that raves about their history. In a class room of D students, I’m the shining star 'A' student. While all you kids will probably get a job at McDonalds, I’m the one who owns the block where you work. You see, I wasn’t just raised to be better…I was born to be better.
And that’s something that Kyle Braddock should have learned last month when I beat him.
Kyle, you stand up with your nose up in the air, puffing out your chest like you’re worth a damn, like you actually are something. But there’s something you miss, and you seem to miss it a lot. You might think you’re hot ****…
But I’m the hottest.
Every time we’ve stepped in the ring one on one, I’ve beaten you. You’ve tried to get in my head, you try to get under my skin, poking fun at me, questioning my manhood, and I still come out the victor. I still stand out, while you’re on the floor, looking up at the lights wishing that you never stepped in the ring with me. I don’t blame you for coming at me like you have Kyle, I mean; you are a Hall of Famer. People look up to you…stupid, naïve people. People who can’t separate what you’ve done and what you are now. Yeah, you used to be great Kyle. Former World Champion, longest reigning National Champion, multi-time Tag Team Champion. Your resume speaks for itself. But look at you now. You’re a dying star, ready to explode and fade away from the galaxy for all eternity. You’re in your decline phase; you are just…average, facing opponents who overshadow you in every conceivable way. But you continue to fight; swinging and missing like you’re a rookie who just got called up to The Show. You think you belong with the big boys still, but Kyle, you’re past your prime.
Your time is over.
And it’s only a matter of time where I hurt you, and end this miserable end to your career. I’m sorry Kyle, but somebody has to do it, somebody has to take Old Yeller to the back and put him out of his misery.
It’s for the best, I promise.
Alex Jones…Alex…Jones. What can I say about you that I haven’t said about you already? You don’t deserve to be here, that you are not, in fact, the ‘true’ World champion. You can walk out to the ring spouting your trash, or you can go and have interviews with commentators, but no matter what you say, people still know the truth. That you’re delusional, that you’re just a liar who screams to get attention. That’s what you’ve been your whole career though Alex, somebody who just yells and kicks and screams to get attention. You make up these sad stories, you try to make the fans honestly feel bad for you about how you get no respect, when they should just feel bad for you because you absolutely suck. I’ve known you for quite some time, and you would think that there would be a change, you would become more mature, a more standup guy.
But you’re still the whiny little punk who stepped into my company and ruined it.
You’re still the tie-dyed shirt wearing, multi colored hair, emo kid who wants respect that you haven’t earned. You’ve spent weeks telling the world that I don’t deserve to be champion, but let’s be honest Alex, you’re just jealous. You’re just jealous that I came to this company years after you did, and I accomplished more in months than you did in years. You’re jealous that I’m the face this company needs, while you’re still stuck playing second fiddle to friends. You’re jealous that when people talk about the best wrestlers in wrestling, you’re not on the list, but I am. I threw you bone years ago, I believed in Alex Jones, but you let me down. You let yourself down.
You’re the reason why you’re not World Champion.
This is something you and Kyle can learn, you both bitch and moan you talk about how I grew up with a silver spoon in my mouth, that I woke up on third and thought I hit a triple. I’ve worked hard for everything I own. The championship belts I’ve won were because I spent hours at the gym perfecting my craft. The money I’ve earned was because of the way I’ve promoted myself, something you guys can’t do as well as I can. I’m not just a notch above; I’m a whole planet above all of you fools. I am Charlie Velez, the man you all hate to admit you want to be.
So this Sunday at Crossroads I’m going to climb that ladder, and I’m going to grab onto the belt that I’ve earned. The belt that treats me like trash, but I continue to love unconditionally. When I climb the ladder and hold my championship belt up in victory, I’ll look down at you guys, share a wink or two. If your heads aren’t down, maybe I’ll mouth something to you guys, something that you’ll learn years from now when I’m in the Hall of Fame, when I’m the face of this company forever. I’ll mouth the words now, and in my inauguration you guys will be there to just…
Thank Me Later.”
Venom promised to be with me on the ride home, but only for a short while since he has a huge match this Sunday also…
I tried to call him just to speak with her, but she wouldn’t pick up, she wouldn’t return my text messages. I call my brother to see if he was with her, but he just told me that she dropped the kids off because she had important things to take care of…
He told me she had a travel bag.
The evidence is staring me in the face, but I can’t accept that the truth is right in front of me.
The travel bag.
The shoes.
The sweater.
The scent.
It had to have been her out there, costing me match. She had to be the one who’s making me decide to choose between the two things I love the most…
My beautiful Annette, the only woman I’ve ever loved has turned her back on me.
But I refuse to turn my back on her.
I can’t believe it. The whole idea of it being true is…well, farfetched. Why would she do it to me; make me choose between the two things that I love the most? Why would she hurt me as much as she’s hurting me right now?
I’ve spent more of my life with her then I have without her; I’ve shared secrets, I’ve expressed my love more to her than I have to anybody else in my life. To my mother, to my father, to my brother…she stands number one in my heart.
So why would she do this to me?
Maybe she thinks that I don’t love her as much as she loves me, that all the things that I’ve done; the times that I’ve left her to wrestle finally took a toll on her, maybe she’s just sick and tired of watching me hurt myself and wants me to stay home. To watch our children grow up, to grow old together…
“Charlie, what the hell was that!?”
Venom screams at me from behind. I’m obviously not in a condition to argue; I just fall on my couch, and let him give it to me.
“You can’t concentrate for three seconds!? What the hell is wrong with you man, you’re the *** damn World Champion; you’re supposed to be better than that man! But no, you have too much stupid **** going on in your life that you can’t pay attention to the *** damn match at hand!”
I would argue, but he has a point. This whole thing has turned my world upside down. I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, and I’ve just been physically weak from this whole thing. Being a World Champion doesn’t matter to me anymore…
…and that means she’s winning this fight.
Venom calms down a bit, but I can still see the fire in his eyes. He’s a competitor, one of the best I’ve ever seen, and I know that ever loss, no matter how small the consequences hurt. But we’ve been through a lot together, and he understands that this isn’t me…this is just a shell of my former self.
“So who was that out there, was it her? Was it Annette?”
I can’t bear to look at him; I just let the thoughts run through my head. I know what I saw…
Her face was covered, the hood just covering her face. But it’s something that she owned, her pants, her shoes, they were all items of clothing that she has in her wardrobe. But that’s not even what convinces me…it was her smell. Her aura, the perfume that I bought her for our anniversary…it was all there. The way her hair fell, her scent…
It had to be her.
“I don’t know, but whoever it was is really playing games with me right now.”
“You listen now Charlie, I know you love her, but she’s messing everything up. This is your first World title run, and hell, with the condition you’re in it might be your last! This is supposed to be the pinnacle of your career, the highlight of your LIFE. We’re in our primes Charlie, we’re on top, and you’re going to let HER get in the way!?”
I can’t take it anymore. I thrust up from my seat, and I get in his face. He’s not budging an inch, and our foreheads are against each other.
“Don’t you DARE speak of my wife that way!”
“Look at you man, you’ve gotten soft, you’ve become a shell of yourself! Charlie Velez a few months ago would have laughed and agreed with me, but now you’re just a whiny little bitch!”
I raise my fist up, and my other hand grabs his throat. I shove him against the wall, the back of his head bouncing off the wall. He has this sick smile on his face, nodding his head.
“Yeah, this is the Charlie I know. Punch me, knock my teeth out, give me a black eye, and hurt the only friend you have right now. Do it Charlie…”
I can’t look at him, I try to avoid making eye contact with him but he just continues to scream, continues to urge me punch him, to hurt him, to show him what true power I really have.
“DO IT!”
I swing, punching the wall right next to his face. I let him go, and I just continue to wail away at the wall, trying to make a dent in the concrete. My hands get bloodied, and all the frustration that has been building the past couple of weeks has come out at full force. My hands are numb.
My fingers are bleeding.
My knuckles probably shattered.
I feel to my knees, because I don’t deserve to stand up with my head down. I deserve to be down on my knees, praying to end this misery. To end this all, to finally become the man my father envisioned I would be, the man I expect to be.
The man she wants me to be…
“Charlie, we’re going to get to the bottom of this man. You just need to concentrate on the goal at hand…”
He continues to talk, give me words of encouragement, but I can’t listen. My mind is fogged by these disturbing thoughts, and no matter how much Venom stands behind me, I know I’m all alone.
I’m alone, just me and a championship that’s tearing my life apart.
“I’m at a Crossroads in my life…
Stuck between a rock and a hard place.
Insert any other clever analogy you can to tell everybody how screwed I am.
It didn’t start when I faced Falcon a month ago; hell, Kyle might think that he’s the cause of all this, but you can’t flatter a fool like him for giving him credit for something he had nothing to do with. No, it happened two months prior, when I was facing Dave Holland. When the road to my championship reign started, that’s when it all began. You know, it’s something that I should have prepared myself for; I watched my best friend go through it, I’ve watched my mentor, I’ve watched everybody when they tried to become champion. It tears away at them, it eats them apart, it makes them question if they choose the right profession. I should have been more prepared but…
You live and you learn, huh?
That’s something that my opponents are going to learn. You live, and you learn. You live in a life where you start throwing out challenges to opponents like me, you know, the World champion; you’re going to learn a very valuable lesson. I’m the champion for the reason. I’m champion because I’m better than absolutely every other opponent this company has to offer, I stand above a class of mediocre, not too bright superstars in a federation that raves about their history. In a class room of D students, I’m the shining star 'A' student. While all you kids will probably get a job at McDonalds, I’m the one who owns the block where you work. You see, I wasn’t just raised to be better…I was born to be better.
And that’s something that Kyle Braddock should have learned last month when I beat him.
Kyle, you stand up with your nose up in the air, puffing out your chest like you’re worth a damn, like you actually are something. But there’s something you miss, and you seem to miss it a lot. You might think you’re hot ****…
But I’m the hottest.
Every time we’ve stepped in the ring one on one, I’ve beaten you. You’ve tried to get in my head, you try to get under my skin, poking fun at me, questioning my manhood, and I still come out the victor. I still stand out, while you’re on the floor, looking up at the lights wishing that you never stepped in the ring with me. I don’t blame you for coming at me like you have Kyle, I mean; you are a Hall of Famer. People look up to you…stupid, naïve people. People who can’t separate what you’ve done and what you are now. Yeah, you used to be great Kyle. Former World Champion, longest reigning National Champion, multi-time Tag Team Champion. Your resume speaks for itself. But look at you now. You’re a dying star, ready to explode and fade away from the galaxy for all eternity. You’re in your decline phase; you are just…average, facing opponents who overshadow you in every conceivable way. But you continue to fight; swinging and missing like you’re a rookie who just got called up to The Show. You think you belong with the big boys still, but Kyle, you’re past your prime.
Your time is over.
And it’s only a matter of time where I hurt you, and end this miserable end to your career. I’m sorry Kyle, but somebody has to do it, somebody has to take Old Yeller to the back and put him out of his misery.
It’s for the best, I promise.
Alex Jones…Alex…Jones. What can I say about you that I haven’t said about you already? You don’t deserve to be here, that you are not, in fact, the ‘true’ World champion. You can walk out to the ring spouting your trash, or you can go and have interviews with commentators, but no matter what you say, people still know the truth. That you’re delusional, that you’re just a liar who screams to get attention. That’s what you’ve been your whole career though Alex, somebody who just yells and kicks and screams to get attention. You make up these sad stories, you try to make the fans honestly feel bad for you about how you get no respect, when they should just feel bad for you because you absolutely suck. I’ve known you for quite some time, and you would think that there would be a change, you would become more mature, a more standup guy.
But you’re still the whiny little punk who stepped into my company and ruined it.
You’re still the tie-dyed shirt wearing, multi colored hair, emo kid who wants respect that you haven’t earned. You’ve spent weeks telling the world that I don’t deserve to be champion, but let’s be honest Alex, you’re just jealous. You’re just jealous that I came to this company years after you did, and I accomplished more in months than you did in years. You’re jealous that I’m the face this company needs, while you’re still stuck playing second fiddle to friends. You’re jealous that when people talk about the best wrestlers in wrestling, you’re not on the list, but I am. I threw you bone years ago, I believed in Alex Jones, but you let me down. You let yourself down.
You’re the reason why you’re not World Champion.
This is something you and Kyle can learn, you both bitch and moan you talk about how I grew up with a silver spoon in my mouth, that I woke up on third and thought I hit a triple. I’ve worked hard for everything I own. The championship belts I’ve won were because I spent hours at the gym perfecting my craft. The money I’ve earned was because of the way I’ve promoted myself, something you guys can’t do as well as I can. I’m not just a notch above; I’m a whole planet above all of you fools. I am Charlie Velez, the man you all hate to admit you want to be.
So this Sunday at Crossroads I’m going to climb that ladder, and I’m going to grab onto the belt that I’ve earned. The belt that treats me like trash, but I continue to love unconditionally. When I climb the ladder and hold my championship belt up in victory, I’ll look down at you guys, share a wink or two. If your heads aren’t down, maybe I’ll mouth something to you guys, something that you’ll learn years from now when I’m in the Hall of Fame, when I’m the face of this company forever. I’ll mouth the words now, and in my inauguration you guys will be there to just…
Thank Me Later.”
Venom promised to be with me on the ride home, but only for a short while since he has a huge match this Sunday also…
I tried to call him just to speak with her, but she wouldn’t pick up, she wouldn’t return my text messages. I call my brother to see if he was with her, but he just told me that she dropped the kids off because she had important things to take care of…
He told me she had a travel bag.
The evidence is staring me in the face, but I can’t accept that the truth is right in front of me.
The travel bag.
The shoes.
The sweater.
The scent.
It had to have been her out there, costing me match. She had to be the one who’s making me decide to choose between the two things I love the most…
My beautiful Annette, the only woman I’ve ever loved has turned her back on me.
But I refuse to turn my back on her.