Post by Jabari Woodhead on Jul 31, 2011 8:55:12 GMT -6
(The Scene opens up with Christian Schweizer and Hans standing in a bleak and empty room. The only thing in the room besides the men is a black leather couch)
Hans: The New Championship Wrestling camera crew should be here any minute now.
Christian Schweizer: No they won’t. I fired them after the little stunt they pulled last week. We are better off using my phone as a camera than relying on those incompetent asses. You know as well as anyone else that s*** talking is the number one weapon I have in my matches. I have the ability to get into my opponents head long before the match even begins. Before the match even starts I have already beaten him and he knows it and then all it takes is a swift, stiff kick to the head and then it’s all over. Luckily I was able to find a new camera crew on short notice.
Hans: Oh really? Do they even have camera equipment?
Christian Schweizer: Yeah, one guy has a Flip camera so we can shoot in high def and they have a guy who has a boom mic.
Hans: A random guy you found has a boom mic?
Christian Schweizer: Yeah he used to work in the movie industry in Canada.
Hans: What kind of movies?
Christian Schweizer: Mostly low budget movies in houses. He did win an award for sound for one of his movies.
Hans: That's just great. Where are these guys at?
(Three guys then walk into the room)
Christian Schweizer: See the guys are here. They are much more reliable than those idiots that nCw lets us use. How's it going guys.
Man 1: It's going great eh. It's nice to have work again eh.
(Hans leans close to Christian)
Hans: Where did you find this guy?
Christian Schweizer: This is the Canadian guy.
Hans: No I meant the big one.
(The camera pans to the meat head standing in front of Christian and Hans)
Christian Schweizer: Oh that guy. He used to be my body guard when I was playing soccer. He's the one with the camera. Franz are you ready to start shooting.
Franz: Ja
Christian Schweizer: Good let’s get this show on the road.
Man1: Where do you want me to put the mic eh?
Christian Schweizer: Bob, you can stand anywhere as long as you are out of the shot.
Bob: Okay coach.
Christian Schweizer: Hans turn the phone off and then we can start shooting this thing for real.
Hans: Okay, Christian.
(Hans turns the phone's camera off and the scene fades to black then fades back in with a new, clearer picture)
Christian Schweizer: Good it’s working. Let's do this. I would just like to thank Jason Blair for beating me last week. It was truly the best thing for my career. Sure I haven't been here very long but I was really starting to think that I could go undefeated forever. I was starting to get a big head because I made it look so easy with wins over the Russian cabby who know one remembers and a win against Freakke. Jason, you let me taste defeat for the first time and I thank you because now I can learn to accept defeat and can come back the next week even better like I will this week. However I also feel bad for you because I hate losing. It is seriously the worst thing ever. I hate losing and losing last week to you really pissed me off. It pissed me off so bad that I actually went to Leonard Fox himself and demanded a match this week against you so I could get my revenge for what happened last week. He wouldn't let me face you one on one because he didn't want me to single handedly destroy any sort of reputation or respect you have already gained here so he put us in a little tag team match at Picture Perfect. We both got to pick our tag team partner and I truly question what you were thinking in picking Mike Machado.
(Christian clears his throat before continuing)
Christian Schweizer: Jason Blair, you could have picked anyone in New Championship Wrestling and you pick Mike Machado. If I didn't know any better I would think that you were trying to let Jackhammer and I win this week. This is on such a level that I don't even know really what to say. I guess this would be like the Dallas Cowboys have the ability to choose either John Elway or Tony Romo and them picking Tony Romo over a hall of famer. You would be better of teaming up with Caleb Lockwood, Chuck Moss, Mark Evil or any of the other dozen homeless f***s that inhabit the nCw roster. You are better off using Hexx or Mimic as your tag team partner than using Machado.
(Christian clears his throat and takes a drink of water)
Christian Schweizer: The difference between you and I is that instead of picking someone mediocre I went out and found the biggest, baddest son of a bitch that nCw has to offer. I went out and picked the man simply known as Jackhammer. I picked him because he definitely gives my team an advantage with his size, speed and strength. You guys might as well not even show up because between my in ring intelligence and Jackhammer's freakish strength there is absolutely no way that you can beat us on Sunday.
(The scene fades to black)
Hans: The New Championship Wrestling camera crew should be here any minute now.
Christian Schweizer: No they won’t. I fired them after the little stunt they pulled last week. We are better off using my phone as a camera than relying on those incompetent asses. You know as well as anyone else that s*** talking is the number one weapon I have in my matches. I have the ability to get into my opponents head long before the match even begins. Before the match even starts I have already beaten him and he knows it and then all it takes is a swift, stiff kick to the head and then it’s all over. Luckily I was able to find a new camera crew on short notice.
Hans: Oh really? Do they even have camera equipment?
Christian Schweizer: Yeah, one guy has a Flip camera so we can shoot in high def and they have a guy who has a boom mic.
Hans: A random guy you found has a boom mic?
Christian Schweizer: Yeah he used to work in the movie industry in Canada.
Hans: What kind of movies?
Christian Schweizer: Mostly low budget movies in houses. He did win an award for sound for one of his movies.
Hans: That's just great. Where are these guys at?
(Three guys then walk into the room)
Christian Schweizer: See the guys are here. They are much more reliable than those idiots that nCw lets us use. How's it going guys.
Man 1: It's going great eh. It's nice to have work again eh.
(Hans leans close to Christian)
Hans: Where did you find this guy?
Christian Schweizer: This is the Canadian guy.
Hans: No I meant the big one.
(The camera pans to the meat head standing in front of Christian and Hans)
Christian Schweizer: Oh that guy. He used to be my body guard when I was playing soccer. He's the one with the camera. Franz are you ready to start shooting.
Franz: Ja
Christian Schweizer: Good let’s get this show on the road.
Man1: Where do you want me to put the mic eh?
Christian Schweizer: Bob, you can stand anywhere as long as you are out of the shot.
Bob: Okay coach.
Christian Schweizer: Hans turn the phone off and then we can start shooting this thing for real.
Hans: Okay, Christian.
(Hans turns the phone's camera off and the scene fades to black then fades back in with a new, clearer picture)
Christian Schweizer: Good it’s working. Let's do this. I would just like to thank Jason Blair for beating me last week. It was truly the best thing for my career. Sure I haven't been here very long but I was really starting to think that I could go undefeated forever. I was starting to get a big head because I made it look so easy with wins over the Russian cabby who know one remembers and a win against Freakke. Jason, you let me taste defeat for the first time and I thank you because now I can learn to accept defeat and can come back the next week even better like I will this week. However I also feel bad for you because I hate losing. It is seriously the worst thing ever. I hate losing and losing last week to you really pissed me off. It pissed me off so bad that I actually went to Leonard Fox himself and demanded a match this week against you so I could get my revenge for what happened last week. He wouldn't let me face you one on one because he didn't want me to single handedly destroy any sort of reputation or respect you have already gained here so he put us in a little tag team match at Picture Perfect. We both got to pick our tag team partner and I truly question what you were thinking in picking Mike Machado.
(Christian clears his throat before continuing)
Christian Schweizer: Jason Blair, you could have picked anyone in New Championship Wrestling and you pick Mike Machado. If I didn't know any better I would think that you were trying to let Jackhammer and I win this week. This is on such a level that I don't even know really what to say. I guess this would be like the Dallas Cowboys have the ability to choose either John Elway or Tony Romo and them picking Tony Romo over a hall of famer. You would be better of teaming up with Caleb Lockwood, Chuck Moss, Mark Evil or any of the other dozen homeless f***s that inhabit the nCw roster. You are better off using Hexx or Mimic as your tag team partner than using Machado.
(Christian clears his throat and takes a drink of water)
Christian Schweizer: The difference between you and I is that instead of picking someone mediocre I went out and found the biggest, baddest son of a bitch that nCw has to offer. I went out and picked the man simply known as Jackhammer. I picked him because he definitely gives my team an advantage with his size, speed and strength. You guys might as well not even show up because between my in ring intelligence and Jackhammer's freakish strength there is absolutely no way that you can beat us on Sunday.
(The scene fades to black)