Post by Ricky Johnson on Jan 26, 2008 20:29:25 GMT -6
It's been a while, mostly because I'm lazy, but none the less, I'm really not watching anything but Raw and Impact! Smackdown just seems to not have it anymore. Mainly because since Tazz left, They don't have a color commentator.
But anyway, let's get down to brass tacts.
This Sunday is perhaps the most predictable show in WWE HISTORY. and that says a lot. Don't believe me? Watch this and challenge ANY of my predicitions with reasoning better than mine. I DARE You.
MATCH 1: Ric Flair vs. MVP
Flair is going to Wrestlemania. so a loss here is impossible.
Winner: Ric Flair by Pinfall
MATCH 2: Chris Jericho vs. JBL
Since HHH is currently raping Jericho's career by stating that WWE needed to push Jeff Hardy and NOT Chris Jericho, (Which makes a lot of sense, because Hardy is inconsistant, Has mediocre mic skills, and a history of NO-SHOWS, along with a basic move set, while Jericho is awesome on the mic, consistant, and a wide range of moves) Jericho's 'savior' things is gone, the only thing he will save us from now......is JBL's absurd pyro. That's right, WWE cut Christian Pyro to save money, but yet JBL's pyro can level a ****ing city.
Winner: Chris Jericho by DQ
Edge vs. Rey Mysterio
Edge is the only big time heel on Smackdown, anyone else notice this? Having Rey win sets up...what exactly? a re-match with Edge? Rey couldn't beat MVP for the US title, so if he beats Edge, Edge would look weak. However, Edge will make Rey look even more credible.
Winner: Rey Mysterio by DQ
Randy Orton vs. Jeff Hardy
Randy has done nothing but make Jeff look good. From the Matt Hardy stuff, to the Cage Match, to the title/title match, and the Handshake, Jeff has ALL the momentum. Which will look that much sweeter on Randy's resume when he hands Jeff Hardy his Ass.
Winner: Randy Orton by Pinfall.
The Royal Rumble Match.
Triple H is in it. That's all anyone needs to know.
Winner: Triple H
See? I told you.
And now....Ricky goes "Raw" on Triple H/Royal Rumble:
Seriously, I think HHH will be number 1, and will eliminate everyone. he will single-handedly throw out all 29 opponents. Shattering Kane's elimination record and Rey Mysterio's endurance time record, and somehow Bushwacker Luke's record for the shortest stay. He'll probably be thrown out, and He'll start tearing **** up, so Vince will let him back in. **** it, he did it once already, why not twice. I can seriously imagine all this happening.
As soon as JR said on Raw that "The Game is OUT of the Royal Rumble" I knew he was coming back in. and how does he do this? does he go on a winning streak? no. Does he kiss vince's ass to get back? no. Does he Pedigree John Cena on his injured pec, and keep him out longer? No. All of these things, I would have accepted in order to get back in. But what does HHH do? He breaks things. He throws things. He basically had a temper tantrum and got back in.....
WHO BOOKS THIS ****?!
Imagine you get a promotion at work and a co-worker didn't. then the guy trashes the bosses car, and THEN get's promoted. That makes no sense. If I were Hacksaw Jim Duggan, The Highlanders, and Brian Kendrick, I would Start breaking **** too. Since we wanna revert to toddler age solutions to problems.
Statistics show that RR is the second most bought PPV of the year behind WrestleMania, meaning the RR is pretty important. Or so it was until last year.
2007 Royal Rumble winner: The Undertaker. This GURANTEES him a shot at the title of his choosing in the MAIN EVENT of Wrestlemania.
So what match, prey-tell, was the main event of WM23?....
Why John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels of course.
That's basically false advertising.
So the tag line for the winner of the royal rumble should now read....."The winner is in The MAIN EVENT of Wrestlemania....if he's on RAW.
Meh, but I digrees.
AND IN CLOSING....
THE BEST AND WORST ROYAL RUMBLES EVER!
The 2nd Worst RR so far is: 2000: Aside from Mick Foley and the Rock SAVING their matches, 2000 Sucked ass. Aside from the Rock, Kane and the Big Show, who else was gonna win? Al Snow? I could only hope. Albert? Right.
The Worst RR so Far is: 1995.
Bam Bam pushed LT. Stephanie Wyand couldn't do an interview. 1 minute intervals. MANTAUR....Do I need to go on?
The 2nd Best RR so far is: 2004
WWE had a mild laspe in concertration in 2004, pushing actual "wrestlers" in Eddie Guerrero and Chris Benoit *gasp* I said Chris Benoit's name! WWE shall sue me! If you notice when they did highlights of every RR, they skipped 2004....like the **** just didn't happen. So, if you didn't know there was a RR in 2004, let me recap it's greatness.
Match 1: Ric Flair and Batista def. The Dudley Boyz in a tables match
Match 2: Rey Mysterio def. Jamie Noble.
Match 3: Eddie Guerrero def. Chavo Guerrero
Match 4: Brock Lesnar def. Hardcore Holly (worst match)
Match 5: HHH Drew with Shawn Michaels
RR Match: CHRIS BENOIT enters no.1 and wins, last eliminating the Big Show, Benoit lasted a total of 61 minutes
And the BEST RR of all Time so far is: 2001
Hands down, the best RR of all time. Drew Carey, the Honky Tonk Man, Kane sets the new elimination record, Steve Austin becomes first and only man to win 3 RR's. Only ONE bad match on the whole card, that being Ivory vs. Chyna. If you only get one Royal Rumble anthology set ever, get 1998-2002, AKA WWE's best years. Watch the greatness for yourselves.
Ok, I think I'm done, wait, I have another Trivia Question for everyone!
Since Raw's inception in 1993, there have been several times when the WWE title changed hands. But before Raw, the title did switch (albeit for 15 seconds before it was declared Vacant on Saturday night's Main Event. Can you name all 12 title changes on WWE televsion? (remember it's the WWE title.) and no, I am not counting the Jericho victory over HHH in '99, nor the RVD victory over Undertaker in 2002.
Peace, Love, and Chicken Grease.
