Short and To The Eraser

[Joe Everyman]

All this time to make amends
What do you do when all your enemies are friends

Short and to the eraser, get it? Cause I ramble a lot and never get to the point... no, nothing? I thought it was clever.

But, my promo this week is going to be short and to the point. Why? Because I don't have too much to say. I feel like this was going to be my last shot against Will Washington, but he decided to duck me, once again. So my focus was clearly else where this week. I was hoping he would pop up out of no where so we could finish this. But instead... nothing. Not a match. Not a vignette. Not even a text. Will just disappears like a fart in the wind. So, what does that leave me? The lone Wired match before one of the biggest Road to the Golds to date. I get to be put on the back burner again... just my luck. I have no point to run towards. I keep falling backwards, towards the eraser.

A match like this won't help, either. Because I'm not on a grand stage. I'm not even on Trauma. I'm on the internet pre-show for the handful of people who aren't gathering their friends and getting food for the real show. But, at least I'll be seen by the people who illegally stream the pay per view... not that anyone would do that to us. But, being on Wired, I guess, isn't so bad... when there's other matches on there too. But being the only one... that's tough to swallow. I know people will say I'm just bitching, but anybody would say this. Laszlo did, and he's well respected! So, instead of bitching about this match... I'll just bitch about the people in the match.

Mike Laszlo. I have to give it to you, you are one incredibly talented man when it comes to this wrestling stuff. Every time we've fought, you've gotten the better of me. I've tried to never underestimate you, and you show why in every single match why you should never be underestimated. And I won't be underestimating you in this match either. I know it's just a warm up match for the big show, but I still can't take any chances. You are one brilliant wrestler, and you are going to go far in this company. I'm not going to come out here and make any claims to beating you... I'll explain why later. But for now, good luck.

Davey Ortega. The other male in this match. Davey... I've got a lot of respect for you. Probably more than I have for anybody else in this company. You some how come out and always defy the odds and win. And in this match, against Laszlo and myself, you're going to have to do that again. You know that all three of us can hold our own in this business. We can do great things. I'll have to keep both of my eyes on you and Laszlo at any given time, because I don't know where the next attack will come from. I won't underestimate you either, but I will not give any quarter in this match. And I don't expect you to do any different. This match could mean something, or it could not. We won't know until it's all said and done. But in the mean time... good luck to you too, Davey.

Now, moving onto the women. I'll just lump you all into one ball of Zelda wannabes. It'll be easier than way. Mercedes Vargas, stripper name number one! Charity, stripper name number two! And my partner, Cynthia Warren, not so much of a stripper name. I'll just say this... I'm clearly not a Starlet. I don't know much about any of you. That's why I needed to lump you all together. But first off, Mercedes... what have you done recently? Because with the bigger Starlets, I can name what they've been doing lately. But with you... there's just nothing. Am I missing something big? I apologize if I am, but I just haven't seen anything from you lately. Charity... besides being that stripper from Barney Stinson's mailing list, I'm not sure what to do with you. Apparently you have some cult like following and I'm suppose to pay attention to you or something... but, I just see no need to. If you were all that, you would be challenging for the Starlet's Championship... but you're not. And finally, Cynthia Warren... I know you're my partner and all, but meh. Just meh. There's many more Starlet's in this company that are ten times better than you. Maybe you can prove me wrong, just maybe... but I doubt it.

This match has the potential of being something good, I'll tell you that. With Ortega, Laszlo and I, any match can be good. We can go out there and steal the show. And I really hope it does. I hope our match can out gain our sub-par hype and get out there and be great! Because win, lose or draw, a good match can definitely make up for a lot. And I know I'm not putting much thought or effort in to this match. I just have much bigger things on my plate. Rumors, speculations abound. Could something big be happening soon in the life of the one and only Joe Everyman? I guess you'll just have to wait and see! That should keep the ratings up. But in the mean time, I'm going to go back to my hotel room and spend some time with my fiance and daughter. The good life, I'm livin' it grandly. But on a final note... to everyone in this match, best of luck. None of us desperately need to a Wired win to our belts, so instead of focusing on a victory, let's go out there and just have a good match, ok?

And yes, I realize I've sounded like an underwhelming middle school football coach this week. But... oh well. I've got bigger, better things to focus on.

Now and then I'll try to bend
Under pressure
Wind up snapping in the end