Post by Rob Diamond on Mar 18, 2013 12:36:32 GMT -6
One year ago Rob Diamond walked away from New Championship Wrestling with nothing more than a broken heart.
Lost...
Scared...
Alone...
Rob attempted to find a new home, to make his mark somewhere else. He traveld the roads, working the independent scenes, facing down world renowned wrestlers the likes of which no one has ever heard of. He made a name for himself outside of nCw. Finally he had found some peace...
However, it was during one his trips through the mid west that Rob came stumbling piss drunk across what appeared to be the most beautiful woman on the planet. Her name was Katy, she had raven black hair and a set of jugs the size of those mini watermelons that are about the size of grap fruits themselves.
Rob nailed her in what would come to be known as the greatest one night stand the world had ever seen broadcast live on the internet. "Diamond in her butt" went on to win many fan's chocie awards for best celebrity porno and Katy would go on to become extremely pregnant. Choosing, as most women do, the day before a huge match on a pay per view Rob was working to announce the news.
That was a little over 10 months ago...
Rob: THAT BITCH IS A DRUG ADDICT!!!
Today we find Rob Diamond in the midst of the dirtiest custody battle the state of Michigan has ever seen. Rod, looking as sexy as you remember in his plain black tee, leather coat and boot cut skinny jeans with just a little bit of sexy stubble glaring coldly at the still incredibly hot Katy. Her breast popping out of her grey turtle neck as she sat at the table. Between them was the elderly, woman;y judge.
Judge: MR. DIAMOND! If you cannot control yourself I will be forced to hold you in contempt.
Rob:.... Pfft... Whatev...
Katy: Look Judge, Rob can point the finger all he wants, the fact is I passed the drug test, I've got an apartment and a job, the only thing I'm looking for is my child support.
Rob: And the only thing I'm looking for is my damn daughter. Give her over you heroin loving crack whore!
Judge: THAT'S ENOUGH!
The judge slammed both her elderly fists down on the table, the noise sent Rob's attourney, the terribly dressed Mr. Happy, flying backward in his chair and onto the floor.
Judge: Mr. Diamond, I have had enough of your out bursts. Ms. Austin here is correct, she has passed the drug test, she has a home and can provide for this child. As far as the state of Michigan is concerned you have no rights to this child as you've made no attempt to take care of her.
Rob: I've made every-
Judge: Silence Mr. Diamond!
Granny judge face palms for a moment and shakes her head. She pushes her grey hair back out of her face as she looks up at Rob.
Judge: Mr. Diamond, as the judge over seeing this custody dase I have no choice but to side on the part of the mother. You will pay her child support equal to half your weekly income as well as all back child support.
Rob: HALF!!!!!!?
Judge: Those were the terms your attourney agreed to.
Rob whips to his right but Mr. Happy is already on the other side of the room and about to leave.
Judge: This case is ajourned.
And with that the Judge stands up and leaves the room. Katy simply smirks as she follows the judge out. Rob glares coldly from his seat at Mr. Happy.
Rob: WHAT THE F***!!??
Mr. Happy: I thought half was pretty fair.
Rob: I DON'T HAVE A JOB!!!!
Mr. Happy: Exactly, which means you give her half of nothing.
Rob: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!!!!
Mr. Happy drops his head and frowns.
Mr. Happy: I did my best...
Rob: What the Christ...Have we heard back from the Walking Dead about reprising my role from last year?
Mr. Happy: You mean as "Arrow to the head walker"? No I haven't heard from them.
Rob: Dammit. What about RPW?
Mr. Happy: Closed.
Rob: The other NCW?
Mr. Happy: Closed.
Rob: PWA???
Mr. Happy: Closed.
Rob: Son of a bitch... Allright... Sigh...
Suddenly Bane's chant from the Dark Knight Rises begins playing and Rob whips out his trust iPhone. His jaw drops as he sees the screen and quickly answers.
Rob: Well if it isn't my old master. Hello Mr. Helms...
Fade....
Well, well, well if it isn't my old friend New Championship Wrestling. I bet you thought you'd never see my face again, huh? Well here I am, as handsome as ever and ready to get back inside that ring and whip every one of your monkey asses one more time.
Why?
Because it's ***damn fun.
How?
Anyway damn way I can. I mean, seriously, those of you who know me well enough know damn well I will win every single match I can by any means needed.
Ball shot?
Sure.
Fist full of tights?
Hell's to the yeah.
Blind side you with a chair and bash your damn skull in just to watch you bleed?
If you really piss me off I could see that being a possibility. But honestly, number one on my list is to just get back inside the ring. Specifically the nCw ring. Ya see, about a year ago I walked away from this company. There were a variety of reasons and if you really want me to list them off I will, but for now let's just say I was burnt out and fed. So I walked away. Took my little pink ball and went...
Then I got bored.
So I beat some ass here, there and everywhere but you know what? Everywhere I went it just wasn't nCw. There were no Alex Jones' or Andrew Jacobsen's. No Xander's or Knite's. There were no STEVE MOTHER TRUCKING AWESOME'S or Trent Helms. There was no one I knew. No one I cared about. No one I wanted to get in the ring with because compared to some of the people I just named, they were all ****ing nobodies. I mean, let's be honest here. There isn't a promotion on earth like nCw.
So I here I am.
Back where I belong.
Home.
Ready to make ya'll SUCK IT one more time.
Lost...
Scared...
Alone...
Rob attempted to find a new home, to make his mark somewhere else. He traveld the roads, working the independent scenes, facing down world renowned wrestlers the likes of which no one has ever heard of. He made a name for himself outside of nCw. Finally he had found some peace...
However, it was during one his trips through the mid west that Rob came stumbling piss drunk across what appeared to be the most beautiful woman on the planet. Her name was Katy, she had raven black hair and a set of jugs the size of those mini watermelons that are about the size of grap fruits themselves.
Rob nailed her in what would come to be known as the greatest one night stand the world had ever seen broadcast live on the internet. "Diamond in her butt" went on to win many fan's chocie awards for best celebrity porno and Katy would go on to become extremely pregnant. Choosing, as most women do, the day before a huge match on a pay per view Rob was working to announce the news.
That was a little over 10 months ago...
Rob: THAT BITCH IS A DRUG ADDICT!!!
Today we find Rob Diamond in the midst of the dirtiest custody battle the state of Michigan has ever seen. Rod, looking as sexy as you remember in his plain black tee, leather coat and boot cut skinny jeans with just a little bit of sexy stubble glaring coldly at the still incredibly hot Katy. Her breast popping out of her grey turtle neck as she sat at the table. Between them was the elderly, woman;y judge.
Judge: MR. DIAMOND! If you cannot control yourself I will be forced to hold you in contempt.
Rob:.... Pfft... Whatev...
Katy: Look Judge, Rob can point the finger all he wants, the fact is I passed the drug test, I've got an apartment and a job, the only thing I'm looking for is my child support.
Rob: And the only thing I'm looking for is my damn daughter. Give her over you heroin loving crack whore!
Judge: THAT'S ENOUGH!
The judge slammed both her elderly fists down on the table, the noise sent Rob's attourney, the terribly dressed Mr. Happy, flying backward in his chair and onto the floor.
Judge: Mr. Diamond, I have had enough of your out bursts. Ms. Austin here is correct, she has passed the drug test, she has a home and can provide for this child. As far as the state of Michigan is concerned you have no rights to this child as you've made no attempt to take care of her.
Rob: I've made every-
Judge: Silence Mr. Diamond!
Granny judge face palms for a moment and shakes her head. She pushes her grey hair back out of her face as she looks up at Rob.
Judge: Mr. Diamond, as the judge over seeing this custody dase I have no choice but to side on the part of the mother. You will pay her child support equal to half your weekly income as well as all back child support.
Rob: HALF!!!!!!?
Judge: Those were the terms your attourney agreed to.
Rob whips to his right but Mr. Happy is already on the other side of the room and about to leave.
Judge: This case is ajourned.
And with that the Judge stands up and leaves the room. Katy simply smirks as she follows the judge out. Rob glares coldly from his seat at Mr. Happy.
Rob: WHAT THE F***!!??
Mr. Happy: I thought half was pretty fair.
Rob: I DON'T HAVE A JOB!!!!
Mr. Happy: Exactly, which means you give her half of nothing.
Rob: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!!!!
Mr. Happy drops his head and frowns.
Mr. Happy: I did my best...
Rob: What the Christ...Have we heard back from the Walking Dead about reprising my role from last year?
Mr. Happy: You mean as "Arrow to the head walker"? No I haven't heard from them.
Rob: Dammit. What about RPW?
Mr. Happy: Closed.
Rob: The other NCW?
Mr. Happy: Closed.
Rob: PWA???
Mr. Happy: Closed.
Rob: Son of a bitch... Allright... Sigh...
Suddenly Bane's chant from the Dark Knight Rises begins playing and Rob whips out his trust iPhone. His jaw drops as he sees the screen and quickly answers.
Rob: Well if it isn't my old master. Hello Mr. Helms...
Fade....
Well, well, well if it isn't my old friend New Championship Wrestling. I bet you thought you'd never see my face again, huh? Well here I am, as handsome as ever and ready to get back inside that ring and whip every one of your monkey asses one more time.
Why?
Because it's ***damn fun.
How?
Anyway damn way I can. I mean, seriously, those of you who know me well enough know damn well I will win every single match I can by any means needed.
Ball shot?
Sure.
Fist full of tights?
Hell's to the yeah.
Blind side you with a chair and bash your damn skull in just to watch you bleed?
If you really piss me off I could see that being a possibility. But honestly, number one on my list is to just get back inside the ring. Specifically the nCw ring. Ya see, about a year ago I walked away from this company. There were a variety of reasons and if you really want me to list them off I will, but for now let's just say I was burnt out and fed. So I walked away. Took my little pink ball and went...
Then I got bored.
So I beat some ass here, there and everywhere but you know what? Everywhere I went it just wasn't nCw. There were no Alex Jones' or Andrew Jacobsen's. No Xander's or Knite's. There were no STEVE MOTHER TRUCKING AWESOME'S or Trent Helms. There was no one I knew. No one I cared about. No one I wanted to get in the ring with because compared to some of the people I just named, they were all ****ing nobodies. I mean, let's be honest here. There isn't a promotion on earth like nCw.
So I here I am.
Back where I belong.
Home.
Ready to make ya'll SUCK IT one more time.