Post by Shane Hunt on Apr 6, 2013 11:00:36 GMT -6
The cameras fire up and we're face to face with the returning Paul Star. Paul's dressed in a black NCW hooded jumper, black jeans, and red converse trainers. Behind him is a Zoo. As we look at Paul, we see that he's wearing a cheerful smile.
" Hello NCW, and all my Star Gazers who've missed me so much. It's so exciting to be back in NCW, the place with the best wrestlers and the best fans. "
Paul turns his upper body slightly, and points in the direction of the Zoo.
" So, you're probably wondering what I'm doing at the Zoo. Well, I'm supposed to be meeting Jackhammer here, and I agreed to interview him. As you know, I like to do things a bit different than anyone else. When I found out that my first match was against "The Chi-Town Terror", I thought it'd be fun to interview him myself, rather than one of the regular NCW interviewers doing it. The only problem is, I've never conducted an interview before. I've been the interviewee on many occasions, but never gotten the chance to be the interviewer. Oh well, how hard can it be...? "
Paul beckons the camera to follow him, as he chirpilly says " Come on then, we'd best go find him. "
Paul starts walking, with the camera close behind. He's already got his wristband on, which he received on arrival at the Zoo about an hour earlier. As he gets to the gates, he lifts his arm and flashes the wristband. The attendant in the booth nods, and Paul drops his arm back to his side.
The camera continues following Paul, as he spots something he wants to check out.
" Ah, I just need to look at this for a sec. " exclaims Paul, as he walks over to a rather large map and begins running his finger around it. His finger hovers over a certain point for a couple of seconds, and without saying another words he starts walking off down one of the many paths. The camera starts moving slightly after him, and wobbles from side to side as the cameraman attempts to catch up with Paul.
" Let's talk a bit while we walk. As great as it is for the women to watch my ass moving as I walk, I can imagine it'd be dull for the blokes if I stayed silent until we met up with Jackhammer. "
Paul gives a quick shake of his bottom, before speaking on.
" You're probably wondering where I've been for the past two years. Well, I've been wrestling the Indy scene for the majority of that time, just keeping myself fit and having a lot of fun while doing so. Oh, and I got engaged to Jenny Hunt. In fact, we're getting married in June this year. I can't wait, but I'm not going to go on about that too much. "
Paul stops at a split in the path. In front of him on a patch of grass, is a signpost. He looks up at it, then walks down the left pathway. It's not long before we reach what seems to be the location we were headed toward.
Paul turns to face the camera, a puzzled expression on his face.
" Hmm, he doesn't seem to be here yet. "
Paul looks behind himself, into an eclosure with a glass panelled front. He grins and says " Ah, there you are! "
There's no Jackhammer to be seen, but there is a large Gorilla in the enclosure. Paul steps closer to the enclosure, as the Gorilla sits on the ground scratching its head.
Paul asks the Gorilla " Hello Jacky... You don't mind if I call you Jacky, do you? Jackhammer is such a ridiculous name. " As if it were in fact Jackhammer.
The Gorilla obviously doesn't respond. Paul shrugs, and answers his own question with " I guess that's a yes, then. So Jacky, you're even hairier and uglier than I thought you'd be. Not to worry though, as your disgusting features hopefully won't ruin this interview. Now, it's you and me this weekend at Trauma. How have you prepared for a match which is so massive for you? "
The Gorilla looks down to the ground, and spots a banana. He picks it up, and bites into it. Paul nods, happy with this "answer".
" You've prepared by eating healthy? Well, that's a good start. Have you done anything else to prepare yourself? "
Paul awaits a response, but all he sees is the Gorilla scratching it's nuts with his free hand. Paul's eyes widen, shocked at what he's witnessing from "Jackhammer".
" You've just sat there playing with yourself?? I know you must have watched some tapes featuring me to learn some of my moves, but they weren't that kind of tapes! Jesus man, you've got problems if that's what you do whenever you see me. I hope you don't get the urge to do that in the middle of our match this weekend, because I'm leaving the ring if you start pulling down your pants in front of me. "
Paul takes a breath to compose himself, as he was rather taken aback by the Gorilla's response.
" Moving on, do you think you can beat me? "
The Gorilla sniffs its fingers, and goes back to sitting around doing nothing in particular. Paul raises an eyebrow.
" Hmm, I'll take that as a no. I don't blame you for thinking you can't beat me. I mean, I am Paul Star after all. I'm one of the best wrestlers ever to lace up his boots. I'm the fastest, highest flying wrestler in NCW, and as the icing on the cake I'm the best looking wrestler in the fed. Anyway, that's all the time I can be bothered to spend interviewing you. See you later, Jacky. "
Paul flashes a cheeky smile at the camera, as he walks far enough away from the Gorilla that it's not in the cameras view anymore.
" Well Jacky, that was an interesting interview. That Gorilla looked like you, he smelled like you, but the difference between him and you is he's probably a better wrestler than you are. "
The smile sticks for a few more seconds, then is replaced by a more serious expression.
" All joking aside, I saw what you had to say about me the other day. Jesus, you drone on a lot about nothing in particular. I mean, as if I'm riding on your coat tails... I've never met you, and after Saturday night I hope I never have to again. How am I riding on your coat tails and trying to take your glory? I don't need to ride on anyones coat tails. I'm born to be a star, hence my name. I don't need to be carried to the top. I can climb that ladder unaided. I can also fight my own way to glory. I may have to do it at the expense of people such as yourself, and if that's what you meant by me taking your glory then I suppose you're correct. I'll be taking your glory by beating you hands down. There won't be any close calls or back and forths. There'll just be me, beating you down and making you look worthless. After I'm done, you'll be wishing you never crawled out of whatever hole you appeared from to come back to NCW. "
Paul takes a breath, then continues.
" Oh, and you're my worst nightmare, are you? As if! It was more like a dream come true when I saw I'd be against you this week. I was hoping for a nice easy match to show everyone I've not lost it over the past couple of years, and I got just that. I wanted a big, clumsy oaf, and I got a match against the biggest and clumsiest of them all. So Jacky, I'll see you at Trauma where you'll become, sorry to steal your ridiculous catchphrase... Just another victim of an Attitude Injection! "
Paul chuckles to himself, then walks off to see the Penguins. He does love Penguins! Scene end!
" Hello NCW, and all my Star Gazers who've missed me so much. It's so exciting to be back in NCW, the place with the best wrestlers and the best fans. "
Paul turns his upper body slightly, and points in the direction of the Zoo.
" So, you're probably wondering what I'm doing at the Zoo. Well, I'm supposed to be meeting Jackhammer here, and I agreed to interview him. As you know, I like to do things a bit different than anyone else. When I found out that my first match was against "The Chi-Town Terror", I thought it'd be fun to interview him myself, rather than one of the regular NCW interviewers doing it. The only problem is, I've never conducted an interview before. I've been the interviewee on many occasions, but never gotten the chance to be the interviewer. Oh well, how hard can it be...? "
Paul beckons the camera to follow him, as he chirpilly says " Come on then, we'd best go find him. "
Paul starts walking, with the camera close behind. He's already got his wristband on, which he received on arrival at the Zoo about an hour earlier. As he gets to the gates, he lifts his arm and flashes the wristband. The attendant in the booth nods, and Paul drops his arm back to his side.
The camera continues following Paul, as he spots something he wants to check out.
" Ah, I just need to look at this for a sec. " exclaims Paul, as he walks over to a rather large map and begins running his finger around it. His finger hovers over a certain point for a couple of seconds, and without saying another words he starts walking off down one of the many paths. The camera starts moving slightly after him, and wobbles from side to side as the cameraman attempts to catch up with Paul.
" Let's talk a bit while we walk. As great as it is for the women to watch my ass moving as I walk, I can imagine it'd be dull for the blokes if I stayed silent until we met up with Jackhammer. "
Paul gives a quick shake of his bottom, before speaking on.
" You're probably wondering where I've been for the past two years. Well, I've been wrestling the Indy scene for the majority of that time, just keeping myself fit and having a lot of fun while doing so. Oh, and I got engaged to Jenny Hunt. In fact, we're getting married in June this year. I can't wait, but I'm not going to go on about that too much. "
Paul stops at a split in the path. In front of him on a patch of grass, is a signpost. He looks up at it, then walks down the left pathway. It's not long before we reach what seems to be the location we were headed toward.
Paul turns to face the camera, a puzzled expression on his face.
" Hmm, he doesn't seem to be here yet. "
Paul looks behind himself, into an eclosure with a glass panelled front. He grins and says " Ah, there you are! "
There's no Jackhammer to be seen, but there is a large Gorilla in the enclosure. Paul steps closer to the enclosure, as the Gorilla sits on the ground scratching its head.
Paul asks the Gorilla " Hello Jacky... You don't mind if I call you Jacky, do you? Jackhammer is such a ridiculous name. " As if it were in fact Jackhammer.
The Gorilla obviously doesn't respond. Paul shrugs, and answers his own question with " I guess that's a yes, then. So Jacky, you're even hairier and uglier than I thought you'd be. Not to worry though, as your disgusting features hopefully won't ruin this interview. Now, it's you and me this weekend at Trauma. How have you prepared for a match which is so massive for you? "
The Gorilla looks down to the ground, and spots a banana. He picks it up, and bites into it. Paul nods, happy with this "answer".
" You've prepared by eating healthy? Well, that's a good start. Have you done anything else to prepare yourself? "
Paul awaits a response, but all he sees is the Gorilla scratching it's nuts with his free hand. Paul's eyes widen, shocked at what he's witnessing from "Jackhammer".
" You've just sat there playing with yourself?? I know you must have watched some tapes featuring me to learn some of my moves, but they weren't that kind of tapes! Jesus man, you've got problems if that's what you do whenever you see me. I hope you don't get the urge to do that in the middle of our match this weekend, because I'm leaving the ring if you start pulling down your pants in front of me. "
Paul takes a breath to compose himself, as he was rather taken aback by the Gorilla's response.
" Moving on, do you think you can beat me? "
The Gorilla sniffs its fingers, and goes back to sitting around doing nothing in particular. Paul raises an eyebrow.
" Hmm, I'll take that as a no. I don't blame you for thinking you can't beat me. I mean, I am Paul Star after all. I'm one of the best wrestlers ever to lace up his boots. I'm the fastest, highest flying wrestler in NCW, and as the icing on the cake I'm the best looking wrestler in the fed. Anyway, that's all the time I can be bothered to spend interviewing you. See you later, Jacky. "
Paul flashes a cheeky smile at the camera, as he walks far enough away from the Gorilla that it's not in the cameras view anymore.
" Well Jacky, that was an interesting interview. That Gorilla looked like you, he smelled like you, but the difference between him and you is he's probably a better wrestler than you are. "
The smile sticks for a few more seconds, then is replaced by a more serious expression.
" All joking aside, I saw what you had to say about me the other day. Jesus, you drone on a lot about nothing in particular. I mean, as if I'm riding on your coat tails... I've never met you, and after Saturday night I hope I never have to again. How am I riding on your coat tails and trying to take your glory? I don't need to ride on anyones coat tails. I'm born to be a star, hence my name. I don't need to be carried to the top. I can climb that ladder unaided. I can also fight my own way to glory. I may have to do it at the expense of people such as yourself, and if that's what you meant by me taking your glory then I suppose you're correct. I'll be taking your glory by beating you hands down. There won't be any close calls or back and forths. There'll just be me, beating you down and making you look worthless. After I'm done, you'll be wishing you never crawled out of whatever hole you appeared from to come back to NCW. "
Paul takes a breath, then continues.
" Oh, and you're my worst nightmare, are you? As if! It was more like a dream come true when I saw I'd be against you this week. I was hoping for a nice easy match to show everyone I've not lost it over the past couple of years, and I got just that. I wanted a big, clumsy oaf, and I got a match against the biggest and clumsiest of them all. So Jacky, I'll see you at Trauma where you'll become, sorry to steal your ridiculous catchphrase... Just another victim of an Attitude Injection! "
Paul chuckles to himself, then walks off to see the Penguins. He does love Penguins! Scene end!