Post by Adam on Jan 24, 2008 0:35:18 GMT -6
{The scene obese up as we see a very large... incredibly ugly man with a mop and bucket. He is the type of ugly that screams at you "damn, that's one ugly he b*tch" he mops the floors of a local EZ mart oblivious to the store patrons laughing at him behind his back. This man is non other then the legend, Jimmy Turner. A man whose legacy proceeds him, causing "all you can eat" buffets to put up "closed" signs. So how about we let this scene play out.}
::Jimmy lifts his head as he hears the snickers all around him. What could they be laughing at, he silently thinks to himself. Little does he know that the children have taped a "wide load" sign to his buttocks, and it i s he who is the butt of their laughter. Jimmy continues mopping until he hears even more snickers, finally deciding to see what's going on he lifts his head again and faces the children, feeling something odd he reaches behind him and pulls the sign off his butt cheek, now he's furious. Jimmy takes off in hot pursuit of the children but they have already ran out the door and his morbid weight won't allow him to chase them long before he just gives up and crumples up the paper before throwing it to the ground. Jimmy walks back into the EZ mart and begins going back to work.::
Store Manager: Jimmy! What are you doing running through this store like some kinda crazy hippo!?
::Jimmy takes offense to this remark, but he's not stupid, he understands his gut looks more like a water bed then a human stomach. So he just looks at his manager and apologizes for his actions. He knows he needs this job.::
Jimmy Turner: Sorry sir. Those kids.
Store Manager: Those kids were paying customers and you ran them off, along with the items they had picked up off the shelves... now who is going to pay for that stuff they took!?
Jimmy Turner: I don't know.
Store Manger: It was a rhetorical question Jimmy, you're going to pay for it fat @$$!
::Jimmy has heard enough now, the anger boiling in his stomach like a pot of hot dogs is becoming too much. He's heard enough of this mess.::
Jimmy Turner: That's it, I'm sick of you.
Store Manger: If you don't cut the crap Jimmy, you're going to lose your job.
Jimmy Turner: Well don't worry about that, because I quit!
::Suddenly Jimmy takes the mop handle and smashes it over the head of his store manager! The manager lets out a scream of pain as he holds his head. Jimmy lets out a roar and rips his shirt off and wraps it around the managers neck after turning him around. Jimmy is choking him violently before he kicks his manager to the floor and sticks his head into the mop bucket. Jimmy is screaming in delight as the man is struggling to live. Finally the "fight" is broke up as for once cops are in the right place at the right time, the next thing we know Jimmy is in handcuffs and is being carted away.::
----SOMETIME LATER----
::Now we see Leonard Fox being escorted by some cops to a cell.::
Leonard Fox: Is this him?
Cop: Yeap, we had to restrain him, he started eating his bed lining.
::Another cop opens the cell door and walks in. Positioned on a dolly with restraints all around him and a mouth guard over his face we see the enormous Jimmy Turner.::
Jimmy Turner: Hello Clarice.
::Leonard looks mildly annoyed.::
Jimmy Turner: I'm sorry, this place does things to my mind man.
Leonard Fox: So I heard what you did. I've gotta say Jimmy, I'm impressed. I didn't think you had it in you. Maybe you can finally improve on that 0-29 record of yours?
Jimmy Turner: I'd love to! But how am I supposed to get out of here?
Leonard Fox: Well I payed your bail, your first match is going to be at the pay per view Jimmy.... get ready.
Jimmy Turner: Sure thing Mr. Fox!
::With that, our scene goes away, unlike Jimmy's 4th chin.::
::Jimmy lifts his head as he hears the snickers all around him. What could they be laughing at, he silently thinks to himself. Little does he know that the children have taped a "wide load" sign to his buttocks, and it i s he who is the butt of their laughter. Jimmy continues mopping until he hears even more snickers, finally deciding to see what's going on he lifts his head again and faces the children, feeling something odd he reaches behind him and pulls the sign off his butt cheek, now he's furious. Jimmy takes off in hot pursuit of the children but they have already ran out the door and his morbid weight won't allow him to chase them long before he just gives up and crumples up the paper before throwing it to the ground. Jimmy walks back into the EZ mart and begins going back to work.::
Store Manager: Jimmy! What are you doing running through this store like some kinda crazy hippo!?
::Jimmy takes offense to this remark, but he's not stupid, he understands his gut looks more like a water bed then a human stomach. So he just looks at his manager and apologizes for his actions. He knows he needs this job.::
Jimmy Turner: Sorry sir. Those kids.
Store Manager: Those kids were paying customers and you ran them off, along with the items they had picked up off the shelves... now who is going to pay for that stuff they took!?
Jimmy Turner: I don't know.
Store Manger: It was a rhetorical question Jimmy, you're going to pay for it fat @$$!
::Jimmy has heard enough now, the anger boiling in his stomach like a pot of hot dogs is becoming too much. He's heard enough of this mess.::
Jimmy Turner: That's it, I'm sick of you.
Store Manger: If you don't cut the crap Jimmy, you're going to lose your job.
Jimmy Turner: Well don't worry about that, because I quit!
::Suddenly Jimmy takes the mop handle and smashes it over the head of his store manager! The manager lets out a scream of pain as he holds his head. Jimmy lets out a roar and rips his shirt off and wraps it around the managers neck after turning him around. Jimmy is choking him violently before he kicks his manager to the floor and sticks his head into the mop bucket. Jimmy is screaming in delight as the man is struggling to live. Finally the "fight" is broke up as for once cops are in the right place at the right time, the next thing we know Jimmy is in handcuffs and is being carted away.::
----SOMETIME LATER----
::Now we see Leonard Fox being escorted by some cops to a cell.::
Leonard Fox: Is this him?
Cop: Yeap, we had to restrain him, he started eating his bed lining.
::Another cop opens the cell door and walks in. Positioned on a dolly with restraints all around him and a mouth guard over his face we see the enormous Jimmy Turner.::
Jimmy Turner: Hello Clarice.
::Leonard looks mildly annoyed.::
Jimmy Turner: I'm sorry, this place does things to my mind man.
Leonard Fox: So I heard what you did. I've gotta say Jimmy, I'm impressed. I didn't think you had it in you. Maybe you can finally improve on that 0-29 record of yours?
Jimmy Turner: I'd love to! But how am I supposed to get out of here?
Leonard Fox: Well I payed your bail, your first match is going to be at the pay per view Jimmy.... get ready.
Jimmy Turner: Sure thing Mr. Fox!
::With that, our scene goes away, unlike Jimmy's 4th chin.::
