Post by Jack Ryan on May 8, 2008 8:04:19 GMT -6
Scene: Lowes Multiplex in Chicago, Illinois.
Date: 5/08/08
-Falcon, Talon, Alexis, and Joe Everyman are getting out of their showing of Iron Man. They are laughing and chatting excitedly about how great this movie was, as Talon keeps talking about what he would have done as Tony Stark. Finally Talon notices the camera as Falcon lights up a cigarette. Falcon, Alexis and Everyman move off to the side to discuss the movie, as Talon moves aside to talk face to face to the camera.-
Rob.. you are a funny man. I mean really. I watched that.. and I just laughed and laughed and laughed. Especially at that last couple minutes.. oh wait.. you were being serious then? Man, that fooled me. Well, Rob, you certainly do make it easy. Yes, you are a dork, however, I was not going to go there. I wasn't going to get into your lame comic references, poor card playing skills, or weak analogies. I wasn't going to do what everyone else did and prey on what they would consider weaknesses. I was going to treat you like a man for the first time since you've been here and deal with you as a professional. The key word.. WAS. I was going to do all of that. But you went and just f**ked it all up didn't you? You had to do, what I've heard my entire career, and that's call me a damned clone, and a shadow..the double whammy. Well Rob, I promised you a beating, and that's exactly what I'm going to give you. And all the heroes of Marvel, DC, Star Wars. Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, Stargate SG-1, and whatever else you're into won't be able to save you from getting exactly what you deserve. I don't care who comes to save you.. Spike.. Tyler.. Xavier. It won't make a damn bit of difference to me. You forget that it was just last week Spike Kane in his ultimate lacklusterness couldn't man up enough to wrestle me fairly. Instead, clocking me one with a tire iron. That's fine, if he wants to bitch out whenever he is faced with a challenge, so be it. I'll just take out all of my rage on you. So, sorry, but that's just what I have to do.
-He reaches into his jacket pocket, pulling out two worn playing cards. The first is the King of Diamonds.. the second is the Duece of Diamonds.-
You want a corny poker reference? Here it is. You, Rob, are King-Duece suited. One high card, with an absolute worthless kicker. Basically, you have one shot at pairing up that King, or you might as well muck, cut your losses and save yourself for the next hand. Do you think Social Distortion is going to let you ride their backs forever? Their not just going to sit there and let you hold on to the coattails of whatever career Spike thinks he has left in him. It's sad Rob. We, the Enemies, all know how talented you can be, so why would you forsake all that for a half moments of glory and a meager measure of self serving vengeance? We did everything we could to encourage you, but you saw it all blurred and distorted. You chose to see the remarks as sarcastic, chose to take the word of a few as the word of the many. You had the world at your feet, and you gave it all away.. for what? The notion that Spike, Tyler and Xavier consider you a friend? Because that's all it is Rob, nothing more. By the way, don't embarass yourself further by trying to use another lame dream sequence to ridicule my way of doing things. You just end up making my job easier.
-He puts the cards away, taking out from a different pocket two different cards. The first is a Wolverine card from Marvel VS, the other he holds back for a second.-
So.. this is you Rob? The ultimate invincible Marvel badass huh? I certainly hope so. I hope that you can find that will inside you and be a real man for a change. All you've done since you've been here is follow someone else. First Angel, now Spike Kane.. who's next? Going to become a lackey of Vertigo Dirtmurder when he makes his glorious return? God, I hope not. Oh by now you're chomping at the bit to see what this is aren't you? -Gambit is the other card- What? You were expecting the daughter of Bret Hart in a yellow raincoat weren't you? Well, if you can make s**t up, so can I. I'd like to think of myself as Gambit. Annoying to some, suave and charasmatic to others, but all around somebody you just don't f**k with. But in thinking about all of that made me realize something. You're Cyclops.. not Wolverine. You're vain, whiney, annoying as hell, full of false nobility... oh and nobody wants to be you, EVER. Whether it's X-men Legends 1 or 2, it's still the same. I whoop ass, deliver the best lines, and get the chicks. You sit in the corner combing your perfect hair, waiting for someone to talk to you. What? You thought you were the only nerd here? Oh please, you're not the only visitor to the VG cats. Get over yourself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to rejoin my friends for a day full of festivities. You have three days to find who you really are Robert, or maybe I'll just play Mephisto and retcon your whole existance. Fold or Die Diamond... fold or die..
-He walks away dramatically to rejoin the trio as the camera slowly fades out.-
Date: 5/08/08
-Falcon, Talon, Alexis, and Joe Everyman are getting out of their showing of Iron Man. They are laughing and chatting excitedly about how great this movie was, as Talon keeps talking about what he would have done as Tony Stark. Finally Talon notices the camera as Falcon lights up a cigarette. Falcon, Alexis and Everyman move off to the side to discuss the movie, as Talon moves aside to talk face to face to the camera.-
Rob.. you are a funny man. I mean really. I watched that.. and I just laughed and laughed and laughed. Especially at that last couple minutes.. oh wait.. you were being serious then? Man, that fooled me. Well, Rob, you certainly do make it easy. Yes, you are a dork, however, I was not going to go there. I wasn't going to get into your lame comic references, poor card playing skills, or weak analogies. I wasn't going to do what everyone else did and prey on what they would consider weaknesses. I was going to treat you like a man for the first time since you've been here and deal with you as a professional. The key word.. WAS. I was going to do all of that. But you went and just f**ked it all up didn't you? You had to do, what I've heard my entire career, and that's call me a damned clone, and a shadow..the double whammy. Well Rob, I promised you a beating, and that's exactly what I'm going to give you. And all the heroes of Marvel, DC, Star Wars. Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, Stargate SG-1, and whatever else you're into won't be able to save you from getting exactly what you deserve. I don't care who comes to save you.. Spike.. Tyler.. Xavier. It won't make a damn bit of difference to me. You forget that it was just last week Spike Kane in his ultimate lacklusterness couldn't man up enough to wrestle me fairly. Instead, clocking me one with a tire iron. That's fine, if he wants to bitch out whenever he is faced with a challenge, so be it. I'll just take out all of my rage on you. So, sorry, but that's just what I have to do.
-He reaches into his jacket pocket, pulling out two worn playing cards. The first is the King of Diamonds.. the second is the Duece of Diamonds.-
You want a corny poker reference? Here it is. You, Rob, are King-Duece suited. One high card, with an absolute worthless kicker. Basically, you have one shot at pairing up that King, or you might as well muck, cut your losses and save yourself for the next hand. Do you think Social Distortion is going to let you ride their backs forever? Their not just going to sit there and let you hold on to the coattails of whatever career Spike thinks he has left in him. It's sad Rob. We, the Enemies, all know how talented you can be, so why would you forsake all that for a half moments of glory and a meager measure of self serving vengeance? We did everything we could to encourage you, but you saw it all blurred and distorted. You chose to see the remarks as sarcastic, chose to take the word of a few as the word of the many. You had the world at your feet, and you gave it all away.. for what? The notion that Spike, Tyler and Xavier consider you a friend? Because that's all it is Rob, nothing more. By the way, don't embarass yourself further by trying to use another lame dream sequence to ridicule my way of doing things. You just end up making my job easier.
-He puts the cards away, taking out from a different pocket two different cards. The first is a Wolverine card from Marvel VS, the other he holds back for a second.-
So.. this is you Rob? The ultimate invincible Marvel badass huh? I certainly hope so. I hope that you can find that will inside you and be a real man for a change. All you've done since you've been here is follow someone else. First Angel, now Spike Kane.. who's next? Going to become a lackey of Vertigo Dirtmurder when he makes his glorious return? God, I hope not. Oh by now you're chomping at the bit to see what this is aren't you? -Gambit is the other card- What? You were expecting the daughter of Bret Hart in a yellow raincoat weren't you? Well, if you can make s**t up, so can I. I'd like to think of myself as Gambit. Annoying to some, suave and charasmatic to others, but all around somebody you just don't f**k with. But in thinking about all of that made me realize something. You're Cyclops.. not Wolverine. You're vain, whiney, annoying as hell, full of false nobility... oh and nobody wants to be you, EVER. Whether it's X-men Legends 1 or 2, it's still the same. I whoop ass, deliver the best lines, and get the chicks. You sit in the corner combing your perfect hair, waiting for someone to talk to you. What? You thought you were the only nerd here? Oh please, you're not the only visitor to the VG cats. Get over yourself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to rejoin my friends for a day full of festivities. You have three days to find who you really are Robert, or maybe I'll just play Mephisto and retcon your whole existance. Fold or Die Diamond... fold or die..
-He walks away dramatically to rejoin the trio as the camera slowly fades out.-