Post by Curtis D. Kanyon on May 30, 2009 4:23:04 GMT -6
*The scene opens on the Dirty Deal mobile locker room. The door is wide open and Curtis's duffel bag lays on a bench with a tape on it. Curtis and Ron walk into the room.*
Curtis: The door is already open? What happened here?
Ron: Wasn't me...I think.
*Russell comes in behind them.*
Russell: Everything looks to be here, but I'll help you sue someone if you need to!
Curtis: Wait!
*Curtis runs over the the kitchen area and opens a drawer.*
Curtis: THANK GOODNESS! They didn't steal our sham-wow!
Russell: You care most about the sham-wow?
Curtis: YOU KIDDING!? With it's xtreme clean, it's the only cleaning device for the co-xtreme champions!
Ron: That's right Curtis, nothing like the xtreme power of the sham-wow!
Curtis: See, we can get NCW sponsors, just what co-CEOs needs to be able to do.
*Curtis winks at the camera.*
Curtis: Anyway...
*Curtis walks over and sees his duffel bag with a tape on top of it.*
Curtis: What the hell is this?
Russell: One would surmise some sort of message for you.
Curtis: One would surmise you need to SHUT UP!
*Curtis tosses the tape out the door.*
Curtis: You think I don't know what this is? This is Jack and Jill...I mean...Jason, trying to get in our heads. You think that matters to me? You think what they have to say will have any merit on how I'm going to maim them on Sunday?
Ron: About as much merit as it has on me.
Curtis and Ron: ZERO!
*They fist bump.*
Curtis: You see Russell, I don't sweat those two. Ron doesn't sweat those two. We're going to walk in and out as co-Xtreme champions when all is said and done. Just because Jackhammer makes the jolly green giant look like a midget and Jason makes Lou Ferigno look like an anorexic, doesn't mean they're scary. Quite the opposite. The bigger they are, the harder they fall. And nothing we like more than making people fall.
Ron: That's a lie and you know it!
Curtis: How so?
Ron: We like more making people fall by using weapons.
Curtis: Oh **** yes we do! That's right. Touche good sir, touche.
Russell: STOP WITH THE CURSING! At least when I'm around! You guys are horrible at this!
Curtis: As horrible as Tom Green and his xtreme comedy!
Russell: What the hell are y--
Tom Green: HI EVERYBODY! I'm Tom Green! Check me out as I put foil on my groin and put it in the electric socket!
*Tom Green grabs some foil then starts unzipping his pants. What the hell!?*
Russell: NO! NO DAMNIT!
*Russell runs over to stop him.*
Curtis: See, as co-CEOs, we could even get celebrity appearances! Xtreme ones at that!
Ron: We do rock pretty hard, and thus we know many important people.
Curtis: Who the hell do Jason and Jack know? Some hookers? Jason's got a new bitch every other week and Jack can't keep his woman in line. As for famous people, the best chance they've got of getting close is being mentioned in an Eminem rap for how stupid they are.
Tom Green: Hey guys! I can do that for you know! Look at me everybody! My bum is on the table, my bum is on the table, Jack and Jason are kind of unstable!
Curtis: Dude! You should freestyle. That's amazing.
Tom Green: My bum is on the title, my bum is on th--
*Ron hits Tom Green with the Deal Breaker.*
Ron: NO ONE PUTS THERE BUM ON THE TITLE! Except for me and Curtis...and Amber...but not Russell.
Russell: Amber's bum has been on that...
*Russell sneaks toward the title and tries to lick it, but Ron shoves him away.*
Ron: NO!
Curtis: Jack, you seem to hate me more than usual my friend! You're...back? Weren't you already back? You know, it doesn't matter! What matters is me, kicking your ass! So bring your hate! Bring all your hate boyo! Because I'll match it, and I'll push above it! Maybe I knocked the cobwebs out of your head last week. Well this week, I'm going to knock the life out of you! And once again, it's all legal. With Ron and I working together, and you and Jason working however the hell your going to work, it's a no brainer that we'll be winning. But then again, us teaming up against anyone is a no brainer. You two may be looking at this as a fatal fourway, but no, for Ron and I, we're as thick as thieves. We're in it to win it together. This is as much a tag team match as any other. And you will bow down to our dominance when its all over, not because you'll be humbled...but because you won't be able to stand. Just like Tom.
*Ron pulls Tom up off the floor and Curtis hits him with the Dirty Demolition, flipping him over the table his bum was on earlier.*
Ron: I think he's dead.
Curtis: Then the world is a safer place.
Ron: Is it...?
*Curtis turns to look at the camera. He then charges forward and delivers a Dirty Demolition to the cameraman. The feed then cuts out.*
Curtis: The door is already open? What happened here?
Ron: Wasn't me...I think.
*Russell comes in behind them.*
Russell: Everything looks to be here, but I'll help you sue someone if you need to!
Curtis: Wait!
*Curtis runs over the the kitchen area and opens a drawer.*
Curtis: THANK GOODNESS! They didn't steal our sham-wow!
Russell: You care most about the sham-wow?
Curtis: YOU KIDDING!? With it's xtreme clean, it's the only cleaning device for the co-xtreme champions!
Ron: That's right Curtis, nothing like the xtreme power of the sham-wow!
Curtis: See, we can get NCW sponsors, just what co-CEOs needs to be able to do.
*Curtis winks at the camera.*
Curtis: Anyway...
*Curtis walks over and sees his duffel bag with a tape on top of it.*
Curtis: What the hell is this?
Russell: One would surmise some sort of message for you.
Curtis: One would surmise you need to SHUT UP!
*Curtis tosses the tape out the door.*
Curtis: You think I don't know what this is? This is Jack and Jill...I mean...Jason, trying to get in our heads. You think that matters to me? You think what they have to say will have any merit on how I'm going to maim them on Sunday?
Ron: About as much merit as it has on me.
Curtis and Ron: ZERO!
*They fist bump.*
Curtis: You see Russell, I don't sweat those two. Ron doesn't sweat those two. We're going to walk in and out as co-Xtreme champions when all is said and done. Just because Jackhammer makes the jolly green giant look like a midget and Jason makes Lou Ferigno look like an anorexic, doesn't mean they're scary. Quite the opposite. The bigger they are, the harder they fall. And nothing we like more than making people fall.
Ron: That's a lie and you know it!
Curtis: How so?
Ron: We like more making people fall by using weapons.
Curtis: Oh **** yes we do! That's right. Touche good sir, touche.
Russell: STOP WITH THE CURSING! At least when I'm around! You guys are horrible at this!
Curtis: As horrible as Tom Green and his xtreme comedy!
Russell: What the hell are y--
Tom Green: HI EVERYBODY! I'm Tom Green! Check me out as I put foil on my groin and put it in the electric socket!
*Tom Green grabs some foil then starts unzipping his pants. What the hell!?*
Russell: NO! NO DAMNIT!
*Russell runs over to stop him.*
Curtis: See, as co-CEOs, we could even get celebrity appearances! Xtreme ones at that!
Ron: We do rock pretty hard, and thus we know many important people.
Curtis: Who the hell do Jason and Jack know? Some hookers? Jason's got a new bitch every other week and Jack can't keep his woman in line. As for famous people, the best chance they've got of getting close is being mentioned in an Eminem rap for how stupid they are.
Tom Green: Hey guys! I can do that for you know! Look at me everybody! My bum is on the table, my bum is on the table, Jack and Jason are kind of unstable!
Curtis: Dude! You should freestyle. That's amazing.
Tom Green: My bum is on the title, my bum is on th--
*Ron hits Tom Green with the Deal Breaker.*
Ron: NO ONE PUTS THERE BUM ON THE TITLE! Except for me and Curtis...and Amber...but not Russell.
Russell: Amber's bum has been on that...
*Russell sneaks toward the title and tries to lick it, but Ron shoves him away.*
Ron: NO!
Curtis: Jack, you seem to hate me more than usual my friend! You're...back? Weren't you already back? You know, it doesn't matter! What matters is me, kicking your ass! So bring your hate! Bring all your hate boyo! Because I'll match it, and I'll push above it! Maybe I knocked the cobwebs out of your head last week. Well this week, I'm going to knock the life out of you! And once again, it's all legal. With Ron and I working together, and you and Jason working however the hell your going to work, it's a no brainer that we'll be winning. But then again, us teaming up against anyone is a no brainer. You two may be looking at this as a fatal fourway, but no, for Ron and I, we're as thick as thieves. We're in it to win it together. This is as much a tag team match as any other. And you will bow down to our dominance when its all over, not because you'll be humbled...but because you won't be able to stand. Just like Tom.
*Ron pulls Tom up off the floor and Curtis hits him with the Dirty Demolition, flipping him over the table his bum was on earlier.*
Ron: I think he's dead.
Curtis: Then the world is a safer place.
Ron: Is it...?
*Curtis turns to look at the camera. He then charges forward and delivers a Dirty Demolition to the cameraman. The feed then cuts out.*