Post by Keybo Shabaz on Jun 24, 2009 17:49:27 GMT -6
(Everybody wants you by Damone plays in the background, signaling the start of nCws favorite TV show, the Pulse! A highlight clip of nCws finest is shown for an opening montage. Fade in a sound stage, with a large desk and a neon "The Pulse" sign behind it. A man sits at the desk, black suit, gray tie, he shuffles the papers in front of him as the music fades and the camera shifts into position.)
Keybo: Welcome to the hottest show in New Championship Wrestling! That's right, forget O-TV, forget the Fox Line, forget Over the Top, this is where it is at my friends.
The Pulse!
I appreciate your concern people, but Dirty Deal hasn't gotten their hands on me.. yet. But that's not the point, since the more days that pass, the closer we get to yet another Sunday night pay per view extravaganza! That said, it's time for the Rundown!
(Keybo spins in the chair, stopping when he's facing the left side of the desk, looking into camera #2.)
Keybo: Excitement, Drama, Suspense.. sounds like a good weekend at the movies, right? It's also the norm here at New Championship Wrestling!
Hexx vs Adam Knite
nCw World Championship Match
Keybo: And like I predicted, the only thing amazing about this match was that it actually happened. And, just like I predicted, Adam walked away with the title and barely broke a sweat.
Adam Knite 1-0
Shaddix and Jack Hammond vs The Superfans
Keybo: You know, Shaddix and Hammond make a pretty good team all told. If they weren't out to murder one another. Or, well, halfway at that. But the Superfans are showing that they're here to stay, and are stepping closer to tag gold.
The Superfans 2-0
Rob Diamond and Spike Kane
Keybo: And so sayeth the Spiked One, Vengeance is mine! After a vicious beatdown last week, Spike took it out on Robs ankle. Sure, he was disqualified for not breaking the hold after a rope break, but the point was made, wasn't it?
Rob Diamond 3-0
Sexy Jason vs Homeless Harold
Xtreme Rules
Keybo: I can't take anything away from Sexy Jason. The man tries his hardest no matter the odds or the circumstances, but sheer will won't defeat Homeless Harold, and it didn't this week.
Homeless Harold 4-0
Traumas awesomeness only brought you closer to where you really wanted to be, and that is, as always, Collision!
The Ace vs Chris Brock
Unsanctioned Match
Keybo: No rules was exactly that. These two beat the hell out of one another in a parking lot for a good long time. Ace looked like he had it won, but he underestimated the anger he ignited in Brock, and he suffered for it. He'll be sure to 'remember' that next time.
The Ace 4-1
Xavier Williams vs Falcon
Keybo: A night after Spike gave Rob Diamond something to remember for attacking X, Xavier had the chance to do the same for Spike. Unfortunately, that bird is crafty, and he reversed a devastating finisher into a pin for the win.
Xavier Williams 4-2
Night Blade and Perfect Freaks vs Joe Everyman and Burning Angels
Keybo: I hope you didn't try to pee break during this match because that means you missed it. Everyman and Night Blade shrugged off the fact they were in a match and just slugged it out. Allowing Burns to give Nero a Burn Notice and pick up the win.
Everyman and Burning Angels 5-2
Jackhammer vs Curtis Kanyon vs Fergus Callaghan vs Cameron Corvis vs Ron Gibson vs Steve Ramone
Keybo: Well, well, well.. karma does work after all. After blatantly disrespecting me on my show, then accosting me and Sampson at Collision. Dirty Deal got what they deserved from the SFPA. With them out of the way, four men fought for a shot at Sexy Jason. And the winner, was that drunken guy from the pub. Fergus Callaghan.
Jackhammer 5-3
AJ Phoenix vs Davey Ortega
Special Guest Referee: Adam Knite
Keybo: Davey Ortega is back! And better than ever, or well, back up to his old tricks. Using Adam to his advantage to beat AJ Phoenix and seal his spot at the top of the rankings.
AJ Phoenix 5-4
Week: 5-4
2009: 93-56
Keybo: Every week I inch a little closer to one hundred correct predictions. Of course, I can't get there until I look.. into the Future!
(Keybo spins the chair again, stopping facing the other way. He reaches down and puts on a Sexy Jason wig. The camera switching to #3.)
Keybo: You know that great feeling you get when you sit down in front of the TV and your favorite show is coming on? That's how I feel every Saturday night.
Steve Ramone vs Jackhammer
Keybo: Ramone has been clamoring for bigger competition, and well, he gets a handful this time in the Chi town terror. Jackhammer hasn't been the most focused man recently, but he's still dangerous any way you slice it.
Jackhammer
NAZI vs The Superfans
Keybo: After his moment of glory last week, Hexx teams back up with Mimic to take on the Superfans. This match may be little more than to keep The fans in shape, but it will still be exciting to watch.
The Superfans
Falcon vs Philip Burns
Keybo: The winged one versus the burning one. I expect this match to be full of crazy stunts and unpredictable moves. And I'm sorry Phil, but bird boy wins on the unpredictable scale.
Falcon
Homeless Harold vs Chris Brock[/color]
Keybo: Brock goes from an environment where he could get seriously hurt, to facing a man who could seriously hurt him. Please don't try to kill him Harold, he doesn't deserve it.
Homeless Harold
And so, Trauma ends, leaving that empty feeling in the pit of your stomach as you turn off the light and hit the bed. Only to find that euphoria return the very next night!
The Ace vs Cameron Corvis
Unsanctioned Match
Keybo:[/color] Ace is still without a contract, so he can't officially compete, but I don't think Cam Corvis really cares. Just, watch your head buddy, Ace is a whiley one.
Cameron Corvis
Dirty Deal vs Keybo Shabaz
Handicap Match
Keybo:[/color] Yes, yours truly steps into the ring this week to show those two douchebags just exactly who they are messing with. No, I don't expect to win, but after this has finished, both Curtis and Ron will know that you DO NOT put your hands on the Shabaz.
Dirty Deal
Steve Awesome vs "Bad Luck" Chuck
Keybo:[/color] Awesome makes his return against the one guy who can't seem to get anything right. Come on Steve, you need to be ready for Harold. Come on now.
Steve Awesome
Joe Everyman vs Kristoff Liam Bates
Keybo:[/color] If there ever was a test for my man Everyman, this is it right here. Win this match, and you're all but guaranteed a spot in the X Division hunt. Hell, a good performance might do the same. Come on E..
Kristoff Liam Bates
Night Blade vs Shaddix
Special Guest: Jack Hammond
Keybo:[/color] This is it, winner gets an X Division title shot. And to keep it fair, lil Hammy sits in the middle to make sure everything goes down the way it should. Just watch your back Hammy, don't think either of these guys would hesitate to give you a shot to the back of the head.
Night Blade
Adam Knite and Davey Ortega vs Angel and Nero vs Sexy Jason and Fergus Callghan vs Rob Diamond and Xavier Williams
Keybo:[/color] Wow, this is just a giant cluster. Who will win? Who will end up beating the hell out of their partner instead of their opponent? Who knows? I'm just going to take a random stab at the winner.
Sexy Jason and Fergus Callaghan
(He spins around again, back to the center, and camera #1, losing the Jason wig in the process.)
Keybo: Now, I'd like to welcome to the studio the innovative aviator, Falcon!
("On Deaf Ears" by Spineshank plays as Falcon comes out. The crowd is mixed, half booing at his attitude, but half cheering at his entertainment value. He shakes Keybos hand, then plops himself down on the couch.)
Keybo: Welcome to the show, Falco.
Falcon: Sup Keybo. Any luck with the wrestling thing?
Keybo: I'm working on it. I hear you have some evil match planned for you and Spike at Picture Perfect.
Falcon: Oh, that I do. I'll reveal it on Collision. I'll put the 'God' part of the God of Xtreme to the ultimate test, that I can assure you.
Keybo: We look forward to it. So, after Spike, what next?
Falcon: You know Keybo. I've sat here and watched many people come and go, a lot of deserving people get their chance at that ultimate prize, and a lot of undeserving people as well. Maybe it's time to stop watching.
Keybo: So, what are you saying?
Falcon: You'll see.
Keybo: Alright, ready for your fan questions?
Falcon: Sure thing.
Keybo: There were a lot, but most of them were unfit for TV. Anyway, Jack Ryan.. aka Talon asks.. Why don't you call me anymore?
Falcon: Jack.. what the hell? We hang out all the time. Who the hell.. let me see that.
(Falcon takes the card from Keybo. Then sighs and chuckles.)
Falcon: Damnit Chris. He's never going to let this go.
Keybo: (laugh) I wouldn't, that look on your face is going up on the webisode. Anyway, Angel Christianson from Minneapolis, MN asks Are you still feeling the burn from what happened in the Xtreme Ladder Match between Prophet, Sexy Jason and yourself? It was the only time you lost a ladder match.
Falcon: Nice to see someone follows my career to such a depth, but the answer is no.. I'm not angry with Prophet for winning that match, I'm only angry at his dumbass because after that match he was too important to find the time to give me a rematch. Hell, if I thought God owed me any favors I'd ask Him to uncripple the poor bastard so he wouldn't have any excuse.
Keybo: You sure you want to do that?
(Falcon definative nod.)
Keybo: Ok, Patty O'Furniture from Belfast, Ireland asks.. oh, it's for me. Who the hell keeps letting these questions through?
Falcon: What does it say?
Keybo: She wants to know when Fergus Callghan is going to be on the show.
Falcon: So book him. Us Boston boys gotta stick together. Go Sox!
(Crowd pop.)
Keybo: Quite. Last one is.. oh damnit it's from Sampson again.
Falcon: Read it anyway.
Keybo: Dude....sorry about the lack of question last week. I cant make your show great every week... Like you've ever actually made it anything. But now I see that coming up you have Falcon? Seriously? Keyblow...man....the bore-o-meter just broke. You know emo isn't even that cool anymore right? These days....when a dude paints his face and wears skinny jeans we just call him gay. Anyway...I guess my question to Falcon is.....why are you such an asshole these days? I remember before, when you were a young up and comer, happy go lucky, willing to work with anyone.....now your just an asshole with an inferiority complex. TAKE YOUR MEDS BIRD BOY!
Falcon: Wow, an emo joke.. and a gay joke. And he wonders why nobody cares what he has to say. As for his innane question, I'll give the simple mind a simple answer. I'm an asshole Sampson because you suck as a person and you have no soul. Got it? Now go find your hand cam that you got at a flea market and rant about how you hate all these people that more talent than you do. KK Thanks, bye.
Keybo: Never has anything been put more precisely. But, I'm telling my question screener to throw all those out from now on. That's all the time we have for this week, I'd like to thank Falcon for stopping by.
Falcon: Sure thing bucky.
Keybo: For the Pulse, I'm Keybo Shabaz.. always remember..
Steel chairs are fun...
Barbed wire is a good time...
And always tip your waitress...
Good night!
("Everybody wants you" by Damone plays again as Ron and Keybo start scuffling on the stage. Security rushes in to stop the fight as we fade out.)
"Hey, join me again next week when my guest in the studio will be the wheelin and dealin master of spades, The Ace! Questions? Comments? Want to take a gamble? Send them in to:
TheShabaz@newchampionshipwrestling.com
Or Call the studio lines at 1-866-555-3737
And I'll see you here next week!"
(Reply with a question, or PM me if it's private. Just like the Fox Line you can ask ridiculous questions, just edit them for TV.)