Post by Curtis D. Kanyon on Sept 8, 2009 13:37:21 GMT -6
*The scene opens to see Curtis sitting on the "porch" of the Dirty Deal mobile locker room. Ron walks up and sits down next to him, with an ice pack held to his chin.*
Ron: ****ing golf clubs.
Curtis: Who knew a golf club would be our undoing? Who knew that bastard She-man could swing like Tiger Woods?
Ron: Prick.
Curtis: So things come and things go. We're not CEO's anymore. But hey, it was fun while it lasted. We made some great matches. We pissed off a bunch of people. And we gave ourselves some secure contracts with lots and lots of money. But best of all Ron, best of all, we got the tag team titles out of the deal. That's all we ever wanted. That's all we needed. And once we got them, we didn't really want the job anymore.
Ron: Except to find great talent, like Cherry Pie.
Curtis: Well of course. But that's not us anymore. We beat the **** out of both those boys and let them know, you don't mess with Dirty Deal. Now they've earned some stripes. Now they know what it feels like to be hurt. They got lucky. But they got unlucky. Because now they're stuck with the desk jobs, while we get to go back to just doing what we love, with the belts we love to do it with.
Russell: HEY!
Curtis: What?
Russell: None of that!
Curtis: I was talking about the tag belts.
Russell: Yeah, having sex with the tag belts!
Curtis: Uh...no. I mean, while wearing it yes. On top of it, yes. Looking at my reflection in it during, yes. But not with it.
Russell: We don't have CEO safety anymore, you idiots'll have to go back to being more censored.
*Ron goes to slap Russell, but his jaw hurts too much for him to move close enough.*
Curtis: Don't worry buddy, I got it.
*Curtis gets up and slaps Russell.*
Russell: The things I do for my job.
Curtis: Anyway, now we can concentrate on only kicking ass. And our first post-CEO title defense is in the Warfare match with Rob Diamond as a partner. And I swear, if he screws this up for us, we will destroy him! But unlike most of the rubes around here, he actually seems to have some talent. We've fought him before, so we know he can go. And we've seen him since, he's gotten dirtier, better. So as long as he doesn't pull a Jason and decide to completely suck, we should be okay.
Ron: Man, does he suck.
Curtis: And now we have to face Jimmy whozit and the Syndickate. Those losers never pinned us, but they want the world to think they did. The Mark Evil rip off is the one who got the duke, they just stood around. And now they want to ride on the coat tails of some cracked out loser. They're going to come out and talk about how we're screwed because we have to face them. Well oh no, that's not how this is going to work. The three of them, they're trapped with us. They will be kicking and screaming and begging to let them run away, but we won't They are ours to play with. To destroy.
Ron: I do like destruction.
Curtis: We've got the weight of the world off our backs now, and we're ready to go out and maim every son of a bitch that wants to step up to us. These are the next, but they're not the last. We don't give a damn about a missing friend, or a jilted lover, or whatever's wrong with the bastard's we're facing.
Ron: If we win, do we win the adult entertainment too?
Curtis: No. If we were CEO's still, we could add that, but not this time.
Ron: Damn.
Russell: You make so much money.
Amber: Plus I'm still here.
Ron: Yeah...but...we see you everyday.
Curtis: And I have a wife. But no harm in looking! And for Syndickate and Jimmy Wang, there is no harm in looking. As long as they don't touch. Because looking at our belts is the closest they're ever going to get. They will get the touch of fists in their face, shoulders in their gut, arms to the back. Not to mention the countless meetings of steel to their flesh. Battle Grounds will be a glorious night of debauchery and blood. And we shall continue to solidify ourselves as the best damn tag team of all time. That's the deal. And they'll have to live with it...
Ron: Or die with it...
Curtis: ...come Sunday.
Ron: Russell, get us a beer.
Russell: I'm not yours to command!
Ron: We lost the monkey, so it's back to you. Do it. We'll let you sleep with Amber finally.
*Russell runs away.*
Amber: Ugh...what?
Curtis: Don't worry, it's a joke.
Ron: You'll never be that tainted.
Curtis: But seriously, go get us some dirty movies.
*Amber rolls her eyes as the scene fades out.*
Ron: ****ing golf clubs.
Curtis: Who knew a golf club would be our undoing? Who knew that bastard She-man could swing like Tiger Woods?
Ron: Prick.
Curtis: So things come and things go. We're not CEO's anymore. But hey, it was fun while it lasted. We made some great matches. We pissed off a bunch of people. And we gave ourselves some secure contracts with lots and lots of money. But best of all Ron, best of all, we got the tag team titles out of the deal. That's all we ever wanted. That's all we needed. And once we got them, we didn't really want the job anymore.
Ron: Except to find great talent, like Cherry Pie.
Curtis: Well of course. But that's not us anymore. We beat the **** out of both those boys and let them know, you don't mess with Dirty Deal. Now they've earned some stripes. Now they know what it feels like to be hurt. They got lucky. But they got unlucky. Because now they're stuck with the desk jobs, while we get to go back to just doing what we love, with the belts we love to do it with.
Russell: HEY!
Curtis: What?
Russell: None of that!
Curtis: I was talking about the tag belts.
Russell: Yeah, having sex with the tag belts!
Curtis: Uh...no. I mean, while wearing it yes. On top of it, yes. Looking at my reflection in it during, yes. But not with it.
Russell: We don't have CEO safety anymore, you idiots'll have to go back to being more censored.
*Ron goes to slap Russell, but his jaw hurts too much for him to move close enough.*
Curtis: Don't worry buddy, I got it.
*Curtis gets up and slaps Russell.*
Russell: The things I do for my job.
Curtis: Anyway, now we can concentrate on only kicking ass. And our first post-CEO title defense is in the Warfare match with Rob Diamond as a partner. And I swear, if he screws this up for us, we will destroy him! But unlike most of the rubes around here, he actually seems to have some talent. We've fought him before, so we know he can go. And we've seen him since, he's gotten dirtier, better. So as long as he doesn't pull a Jason and decide to completely suck, we should be okay.
Ron: Man, does he suck.
Curtis: And now we have to face Jimmy whozit and the Syndickate. Those losers never pinned us, but they want the world to think they did. The Mark Evil rip off is the one who got the duke, they just stood around. And now they want to ride on the coat tails of some cracked out loser. They're going to come out and talk about how we're screwed because we have to face them. Well oh no, that's not how this is going to work. The three of them, they're trapped with us. They will be kicking and screaming and begging to let them run away, but we won't They are ours to play with. To destroy.
Ron: I do like destruction.
Curtis: We've got the weight of the world off our backs now, and we're ready to go out and maim every son of a bitch that wants to step up to us. These are the next, but they're not the last. We don't give a damn about a missing friend, or a jilted lover, or whatever's wrong with the bastard's we're facing.
Ron: If we win, do we win the adult entertainment too?
Curtis: No. If we were CEO's still, we could add that, but not this time.
Ron: Damn.
Russell: You make so much money.
Amber: Plus I'm still here.
Ron: Yeah...but...we see you everyday.
Curtis: And I have a wife. But no harm in looking! And for Syndickate and Jimmy Wang, there is no harm in looking. As long as they don't touch. Because looking at our belts is the closest they're ever going to get. They will get the touch of fists in their face, shoulders in their gut, arms to the back. Not to mention the countless meetings of steel to their flesh. Battle Grounds will be a glorious night of debauchery and blood. And we shall continue to solidify ourselves as the best damn tag team of all time. That's the deal. And they'll have to live with it...
Ron: Or die with it...
Curtis: ...come Sunday.
Ron: Russell, get us a beer.
Russell: I'm not yours to command!
Ron: We lost the monkey, so it's back to you. Do it. We'll let you sleep with Amber finally.
*Russell runs away.*
Amber: Ugh...what?
Curtis: Don't worry, it's a joke.
Ron: You'll never be that tainted.
Curtis: But seriously, go get us some dirty movies.
*Amber rolls her eyes as the scene fades out.*
