Post by Curtis D. Kanyon on Sept 10, 2009 16:49:35 GMT -6
*We open on the Dirty Deal Mobile locker room still driving in the rain, still hard to see out the windshield.*
Curtis: I swear, this is worse than when I ran the Kessel run in twelve parsecs!
Ron: Man, that was a crazy time.
*A flashback starts. We see Curtis wearing a black vest and has a clean haircut and Ron is dressed up in fur as--*
Ron: No! No flashbacks! We're not that guy with the family!
Curtis: Oh, all right.
Ron: Eyes on the road.
Curtis: You know Ron, we're in this Warfare match, but really, what is it good for? What is war good for man?
Ron: Well, profiteering for one. Inventions. Killing idiots. Survival of the fittest. It's good for a lot of things.
Curtis: You're right, that's the last time I listen to Edwin Starr!
Russell: But he's good.
Ron: Shaddup!
Curtis: So we're on our way to the arena, we can meet up with Rob and make a game plan. Should work out well. I mean, have you seen what we're up against? The guys that want our belts are nothing but filthy porn watchers!
Ron: Yeah...disgusting.
Russell: Totally...
Curtis: ...yeah...And they also lost some guy that means something to them. Hope it wasn't that hit and run...I mean, thing that never happened earlier.
*Another flashback starts.*
Ron: I SAID NO FLASHBACKS!
Curtis: Right, right, sorry. Those boys are lame. I mean, who wants to see them sit around a hotel room and talk about there feelings? And what the **** is a Smurf Bag?
Ron: Idunno.
Russell: I can't say on TV.
Curtis: Liar. You filth! You're unclean! Unclean!
Russell: I do still feel dirty after our stop in the forest. I took like, five showers.
Ron: And you still smell.
Curtis: Like shame.
Ron: Well, and the other thing they always smell like.
Curtis: Yeah, that too.
*Russell starts tearing up.*
Russell: Why do you remind me!? *Sob sob.*
*Russell runs away.*
Amber: Damnit, what did you do to Russell?
Curtis: Nothing he didn't already do to himself.
Amber: It hurts my clients to hear a sobbing man in the other room.
Ron: Shaddup!
Curtis: And then there's that other guy, Jimmy Wang. I'm glad he has little titles in his promo to let us know what he's talking about. It's like Clerks or Fraiser.
Now is the part where we bash Jimmy Zane
Curtis: Like that! Why didn't we think of that?
Ron: Because we're not incoherent and high as a kite.
Russell: SPEAK FOR YOURSELF *SNIFF*
Ron: Damnit Russell!
*Ron picks up a newspaper and rolls it up. He goes off and you hear smacking in the background. Then Ron comes back.*
Curtis: Rob is confusing Jimmy with math, how hard can the guy be? Jimmy doesn't even want to acknowledge us, his sights are only on Rob. And I say let him, because that just means when he ends up getting destroyed by the best damn tag team this world has ever seen, he has no one to blame but himself, well, and the Sindykeate.
Ron: Because they suck.
Now back about Syndicate.
Curtis: We're going to take those boys to school, and when we're done, we'll send them to hell to meet back up with there buddy JW. Because everyone knows that's where he is.
Ron: What does JW stand for anyway?
Curtis: Jerk Wad?
Ron: Jock Washer?
Curtis: Probably one of those.
Ron: Yeah.
Russell: GET CLEAN! GET CLEAN!
Curtis: What is his problem?
*Ron shrugs as the scene fades out.*
Curtis: I swear, this is worse than when I ran the Kessel run in twelve parsecs!
Ron: Man, that was a crazy time.
*A flashback starts. We see Curtis wearing a black vest and has a clean haircut and Ron is dressed up in fur as--*
Ron: No! No flashbacks! We're not that guy with the family!
Curtis: Oh, all right.
Ron: Eyes on the road.
Curtis: You know Ron, we're in this Warfare match, but really, what is it good for? What is war good for man?
Ron: Well, profiteering for one. Inventions. Killing idiots. Survival of the fittest. It's good for a lot of things.
Curtis: You're right, that's the last time I listen to Edwin Starr!
Russell: But he's good.
Ron: Shaddup!
Curtis: So we're on our way to the arena, we can meet up with Rob and make a game plan. Should work out well. I mean, have you seen what we're up against? The guys that want our belts are nothing but filthy porn watchers!
Ron: Yeah...disgusting.
Russell: Totally...
Curtis: ...yeah...And they also lost some guy that means something to them. Hope it wasn't that hit and run...I mean, thing that never happened earlier.
*Another flashback starts.*
Ron: I SAID NO FLASHBACKS!
Curtis: Right, right, sorry. Those boys are lame. I mean, who wants to see them sit around a hotel room and talk about there feelings? And what the **** is a Smurf Bag?
Ron: Idunno.
Russell: I can't say on TV.
Curtis: Liar. You filth! You're unclean! Unclean!
Russell: I do still feel dirty after our stop in the forest. I took like, five showers.
Ron: And you still smell.
Curtis: Like shame.
Ron: Well, and the other thing they always smell like.
Curtis: Yeah, that too.
*Russell starts tearing up.*
Russell: Why do you remind me!? *Sob sob.*
*Russell runs away.*
Amber: Damnit, what did you do to Russell?
Curtis: Nothing he didn't already do to himself.
Amber: It hurts my clients to hear a sobbing man in the other room.
Ron: Shaddup!
Curtis: And then there's that other guy, Jimmy Wang. I'm glad he has little titles in his promo to let us know what he's talking about. It's like Clerks or Fraiser.
Now is the part where we bash Jimmy Zane
Curtis: Like that! Why didn't we think of that?
Ron: Because we're not incoherent and high as a kite.
Russell: SPEAK FOR YOURSELF *SNIFF*
Ron: Damnit Russell!
*Ron picks up a newspaper and rolls it up. He goes off and you hear smacking in the background. Then Ron comes back.*
Curtis: Rob is confusing Jimmy with math, how hard can the guy be? Jimmy doesn't even want to acknowledge us, his sights are only on Rob. And I say let him, because that just means when he ends up getting destroyed by the best damn tag team this world has ever seen, he has no one to blame but himself, well, and the Sindykeate.
Ron: Because they suck.
Now back about Syndicate.
Curtis: We're going to take those boys to school, and when we're done, we'll send them to hell to meet back up with there buddy JW. Because everyone knows that's where he is.
Ron: What does JW stand for anyway?
Curtis: Jerk Wad?
Ron: Jock Washer?
Curtis: Probably one of those.
Ron: Yeah.
Russell: GET CLEAN! GET CLEAN!
Curtis: What is his problem?
*Ron shrugs as the scene fades out.*