Post by Curtis D. Kanyon on Oct 15, 2009 5:16:54 GMT -6
*We open in on Curtis sitting on the retractable steps in front of the door to the Dirty Deal Mobile Locker Room. He looks up to see the camera. He smirks. Ron runs by.*
Ron: Everybody get down!
Curtis: This is great. We run a deal with Skynet and Ron goes crazy. And maybe there's something to it, I don't know. Is Terminus the real threat? Is he? Can a Filthy Compromise destroy a terminator? I think so.
Ron: GET TO THE CHOPPAH!
Curtis: And Willy? Poor Willy. He really thinks he has a chance? He really believes with all his heart that he can take the best belts in NCW off the best tag team in NCW? No.
*Ron looks to the sky.*
Ron: Come on, I'm here, do it now! Kill me now, come on I'm here!
Curtis: Ron wants Sperminus™ now. He wants them to come to us. But they won't. If they're smart. Rest up now to bring the pain Sunday. But it won't help them much. We're Dirty Deal. We're the alpha males of NCW. No one can dispute that. Our titles prove it. Our dominance over every other champion proves it. Not to mention all the awards we've won. Weekly awards, monthly awards, humanitarian awards, hell, we've even got a few Hammy's! What has Spencer and Terminus done? They both just walked in the door a minute ago and fell into a rag tag tag team! They don't deserve a shot against us, but then again, no one does. Because there's no one left. Management had to make up a new tag team to give us a challenge! And this is the best they could come up with?
*Ron grabs Russell and shakes him.*
Ron: Who is your daddy and what does he do?
Russell: He's...in prison...for what he did.
*Russell starts crying and runs off.*
Curtis: Daddy. Heh. I'm a good dad. I take care of my wife and child. Willy loses his to booze. He throws his child around on TV to look like some sort of good role model. Well smurf you Willy. We all know you're type. The drunk daddy. We can tell with all those crazy ramblings. Talking about the civil war and monkeys and whatever else. And saying you want the tag team belts more now than ever before? There wasn't a before! You didn't have a before! Which is funny because you won't have a future either. Kind of ironic. But Willy, you feel new and refreshed and reinvigorated? What, did you go through vaginal rejuvination? Because that's what it sounds like to me. Get it nipped, tucked, and tightened, doesn't change the fact that you were loose and wrecked because you don't know any better, and it's just going to happen again. No Willy, I don't give a damn how much better you feel now, because after Sunday, you'll feel like ****. A giant sack of ****. And that will be all our fault. We can say we'll beat you up and you can say you'll beat us up. But there is a difference. The difference between--
Ron: The difference is... I'm just going to kill you.
Curtis: ...intensity. And frankly, you're too old to have it. And Terminus...well, he's too dumb to have it.
Ron: What is best in life? Crush your enemies! See them driven before you! And hear the lamentation of the women!
Curtis: That's what I'm talking about Ron! See Willy, we'll mind any damn business we please. We're not here to serve you. We're not here to serve the masses. They think we're stagnant? That we're doing jokes past there prime? Well smurf them. We get results, and in the end, that's what matters. You don't have results. And you won't have the result you want this Sunday. That's a fact. You'll be on the ground, looking up.
Ron: It was the pavement that was his enemy!
Curtis: Terminus is being a quiet punk. Probably off meditating or some ****. Whether man or robot, he will not carry Spencer to a win. Niether man has a shot at taking our greatness away from us. We are devastating. We are destruction in human form. We are many things that's wrong with this country. But at the end of the day...we are winners. And no robotic freak's AI can compute that!
Ron: Everybody get down again!
Curtis: My partner is riled up and ready to go. So am I. This will be a war. You're a team that will be gone before it's even started. We've ended plenty of teams before, why not do it again? Sperminus™, you will lay at our feet on Sunday.
Ron: DYAGAHAGHGH!!!!
*Curtis tries to calm Ron down a bit as the scene fades out.*
Ron: Everybody get down!
Curtis: This is great. We run a deal with Skynet and Ron goes crazy. And maybe there's something to it, I don't know. Is Terminus the real threat? Is he? Can a Filthy Compromise destroy a terminator? I think so.
Ron: GET TO THE CHOPPAH!
Curtis: And Willy? Poor Willy. He really thinks he has a chance? He really believes with all his heart that he can take the best belts in NCW off the best tag team in NCW? No.
*Ron looks to the sky.*
Ron: Come on, I'm here, do it now! Kill me now, come on I'm here!
Curtis: Ron wants Sperminus™ now. He wants them to come to us. But they won't. If they're smart. Rest up now to bring the pain Sunday. But it won't help them much. We're Dirty Deal. We're the alpha males of NCW. No one can dispute that. Our titles prove it. Our dominance over every other champion proves it. Not to mention all the awards we've won. Weekly awards, monthly awards, humanitarian awards, hell, we've even got a few Hammy's! What has Spencer and Terminus done? They both just walked in the door a minute ago and fell into a rag tag tag team! They don't deserve a shot against us, but then again, no one does. Because there's no one left. Management had to make up a new tag team to give us a challenge! And this is the best they could come up with?
*Ron grabs Russell and shakes him.*
Ron: Who is your daddy and what does he do?
Russell: He's...in prison...for what he did.
*Russell starts crying and runs off.*
Curtis: Daddy. Heh. I'm a good dad. I take care of my wife and child. Willy loses his to booze. He throws his child around on TV to look like some sort of good role model. Well smurf you Willy. We all know you're type. The drunk daddy. We can tell with all those crazy ramblings. Talking about the civil war and monkeys and whatever else. And saying you want the tag team belts more now than ever before? There wasn't a before! You didn't have a before! Which is funny because you won't have a future either. Kind of ironic. But Willy, you feel new and refreshed and reinvigorated? What, did you go through vaginal rejuvination? Because that's what it sounds like to me. Get it nipped, tucked, and tightened, doesn't change the fact that you were loose and wrecked because you don't know any better, and it's just going to happen again. No Willy, I don't give a damn how much better you feel now, because after Sunday, you'll feel like ****. A giant sack of ****. And that will be all our fault. We can say we'll beat you up and you can say you'll beat us up. But there is a difference. The difference between--
Ron: The difference is... I'm just going to kill you.
Curtis: ...intensity. And frankly, you're too old to have it. And Terminus...well, he's too dumb to have it.
Ron: What is best in life? Crush your enemies! See them driven before you! And hear the lamentation of the women!
Curtis: That's what I'm talking about Ron! See Willy, we'll mind any damn business we please. We're not here to serve you. We're not here to serve the masses. They think we're stagnant? That we're doing jokes past there prime? Well smurf them. We get results, and in the end, that's what matters. You don't have results. And you won't have the result you want this Sunday. That's a fact. You'll be on the ground, looking up.
Ron: It was the pavement that was his enemy!
Curtis: Terminus is being a quiet punk. Probably off meditating or some ****. Whether man or robot, he will not carry Spencer to a win. Niether man has a shot at taking our greatness away from us. We are devastating. We are destruction in human form. We are many things that's wrong with this country. But at the end of the day...we are winners. And no robotic freak's AI can compute that!
Ron: Everybody get down again!
Curtis: My partner is riled up and ready to go. So am I. This will be a war. You're a team that will be gone before it's even started. We've ended plenty of teams before, why not do it again? Sperminus™, you will lay at our feet on Sunday.
Ron: DYAGAHAGHGH!!!!
*Curtis tries to calm Ron down a bit as the scene fades out.*
